Being married vs. being single

[Mike41793]

There are far too many cows out there giving away the milk for free, and at my age, none of them want to get married either

CLASSIC Slim quote right there ladies and gentlemen.

However, i would avoid comparing any women to livestock. It has NOT worked out well from my experiences.

[Slim]

Hey Slim were/are you in the military?

Yes, Sir. Retired after 23 years active duty in the Air Force, then worked for them for 4 years as a USAF Civilian.

[Slim]

However, i would avoid comparing any women to livestock. It has NOT worked out well from my experiences.

Difference is, my friend, I don't make that comparison when they have their hearing aids in...

[Kodieh]

I've been married for two years now, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. While there are times I just want to be alone an play D3 or work the reptiles over for cleaning and feeding, my wife enjoys the animals too and is a gamer as well. I think that you have this idealized version of marriage where you don't find someone into things you like.

Mark my words, if you're still into keeping in 5 years or so then you're going to run into a girl who keeps just like you and has some same interests as you. You won't be able to help it, and you'll probably forget that you don't want to be married.

It's one of those things that in your point of few, everyone actively looks for love. When the actuality is that love just...happens and I frankly find it surprising that arranged marriages still work. But, I guess most couples who were arranged understand some form of no freedom or choice and also understand that there is no option. What's done is done and you make life the best with it. You're from a generation who knows the freedoms of the world and the options you have when it comes to life and love.


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[mues155]

Teenage relationships are crazy dude dont use them as examples!
Well ok sometimes they dont get better lol!
But yeah your way young yet, you'll find a nice girl someday.

Sometimes its hard though, my "baggage" is all of my pets.
Some guys dont like that stuff. I'm sure it'd be harder to find a girl who liked it, especially reptiles.
It is nice being single because no one can tell you what you have do, which pet you can have, if you can leave laundry on the floor, etc.

Luckily for me, I found a boyfriend that is just as messy around the house, likes animals even more (I didnt think it was possible), and has pets himself. Granted our house is pretty much a zoo but hey I love it that way. Never a dull moment.

I would say though with relationships, just dont settle for "pretty good", and pick someone you just have fun with and wont ask you to change.
At least if you dont find that special person you wont be dissapointed then.

[dart]

I had the same views at your age. 13 years later, and the one thing I can tell you is, once you met "her" everything you ever thought changes. I never wanted marriage, DEFINITELY no kids and no commitments. Once I met my wife, everything changed. I now have a wife and child and I can tell you, I've never been happier. Think however you want to now, hell, you're only 17. Be a teenager, do stupid stuff and have fun while it lasts. Because, once you meet "her" your world will get turned upside down.

[Mike41793]

i dont remember what this quote was from or who it was from but i remember reading it. I always thought it applied to me:
"For a marriage to work the couple doesnt have to like the same stuff, they just have to hate the same stuff."

So for me, i dont need to find a girl who likes the Patriots. I just need to find a girl who hates the Jets.

[JaGv]

i been there too saying stuff like that about not wanting to graduate to have kids or get married most of it was out of anger or the tought about not being able to do what ever you want..

now im 21 graduated about to be a father and talking about marriage those were things i never tought i'd be doing would i change them? no, not for anything in the world im looking forward to being able to hold my baby girl in 4 months and being resposible for my own little family and eventualy a husband to my girlfriend so we can live our life how we want..

just enjoy you life when ever you ready things will just fall into place

[olstyn]

I see a few things going on here. First off, almost everyone resists their parents' vision of what their life should be, especially as a teenager. That's fine. You're your own person, and you have to make your own decisions. Weigh the input they give you and decide for yourself, but don't assume that your opinion will never change, and allow yourself to re-evaluate from time to time.

Speaking as a 33 year old who got married less than 2 months ago, circumstances change as your life progresses. For a long time, I thought marriage was just a straight-up bad idea for me, but eventually I realized that the girl I'd been with for a long time was the only person I ever wanted to be with. Gradually my opinion of marriage changed, and after 10 years together, we're finally married, and now my expectation is that the ring on my left hand will be there until I die.

My advice to you is this: don't cave in. Don't let your parents make your life decisions for you, but also don't assume a final outcome one way or the other. Your opinion may never change, and you may be single for your whole life, or it could go the other way. At 17, you have a lot of life still to experience. I'd just say try to make the best decisions you can. As long as you can look back and not regret too many of the choices you made, you're doing alright, married or not.

[Egapal]

So after a heated discussion with my parents, I've decided (planned already a few years back) that I won't get married. Mind you, I'm 17, and I might change my mind, but as of now, I'm firmly stating I'll be staying single for the rest of my life. I've been in relationships (well, teenage ones) and I can 100% say that they're not my cup of tea. I'm more kept to myself, and have a hard time expressing myself, not to mention I'm not very fond of my looks. Back to the main point(s)! I believe if you're not married (just an assumption, and based off my cousins who recently got married) you have more 'freedom' and not bound by anyone or anything (well, except the law of course). I won't have to live by anyone else rules, I'll be free to do what I want, when I want, won't have to worry about saving money for kids or another person, won't be putting up with in-laws (LOL), and I'll be able to live comfortably and be able to expand and start my hobbies. My parents on the other hand (mind you they're an arranged marriage, it was the norm in India back in the day) and they're completely opposed to such an idea. And my grandma even worse. She threatened to send my to India and get a wife and to beat me with a pan if I say such a thing again haha. Back to the point once again, my parents believe you obtain 'better morals', you're not lonely (don't really care about this, seeing as I don't have many friends, and hardly any close ones), happy and you get to sire the next generation. We've been butting heads about this topic ever since my cousin got married last year, and my uncles have even started making bets about if I'm getting married or not. Especially to another Indian, haha. I told them that race doesn't play a part in falling in love, but, I'm still a firm believer that I won't get married.

So, after all my dabbling nonsense, comes the main point(s):

-Are you going to get married or are you going to stay single?
-Do you believe that you have to be married to experience 'true happiness'?
-Do you believe getting married restricts you from doing certain things?

and there's some more, but, I can't think of it. So what's your take on the marriage topic?

There is a time and a place for everything. I got married last year after six years with my now wife. We are expecting our first child this fall. Before I met her I had a string of 6 month relationships going back to when I was your age. I am 33 now. Don't take it as an insult but you are 17. You don't know anything. Good news is that your not suppose to know anything. You are suppose to spend the rest of your life getting a clue. At nearly twice your age, I know twice as much as you. Whats two times zero? Here is my advice. You say you don't want a wife and kids. Don't stay with anyone for more than 6 months or so unless you think this is the person I want to be with forever. Life is too short to waste time with people who aren't right for you. Now you might find that you never find anyone that makes you feel like settling down is better than being single and that's OK. The key is not to settle. I can tell you that it is possible to find the person who changes your mind. So stop telling your parents you never want to settle down. Tell them you are going to wait till you find the love of your life before you do settle down. Surely they don't want to pressure you to settle.