# Site General > Off-topic Cafe > Introduce Yourself! >  Thought I'd better introduce myself as things seem to be a bit shaky .

## Zincubus

Hey ..  I'm getting the distinct feeling of "unwelcomeness" in this forum for some reason ... Something I've NEVER come across in all my years of frequenting forums . 

I've had a few 'biting' comments thrown my way since I ventured in here a few weeks ago and I really don't understand what the issue is .... I've admitted MANY times in here that I'm not an expert on anything but I have had many years of successful snake keeping .... I currently own 17 snakes of different types and in all my time I've never had a snake die on me . I had one with an RI many years ago and was lucky enough to be able  to cure it myself by nebulising F10 for a couple of weeks. 

Any advice I have suggested / posted has either been from my experiences or my friends .

Just think you need to cut the new guys a bit of slack .... I' m a real nice guy

Currently have .

1 Snow Boa - 7' adult -  the featured Snow Boa in John Berry's Designer Boa Morphs .
1 Dwarf Hypo Burmese Python
2 HC Albino Royal Pythons ( unrelated pair )
1 Pastel Royal Python
1 Rhino- nosed rat snake
1 Red Mountain Bamboo rat snake. 
I Imperial Pueblan Hybrid ( King x Milk)
1 Amel Stripe aduit Corn snake 
1 Banded Cali King 
1 Albino Striped Cali King
1 Desert King 
4 Garter snakes ( I Melanistic 'Black' and 3 Albino Chequered Garters)


I have Aspergers ( form of autism ) and have worked in education for 19 years helping autistic teenagers to survive the torture of secondary / high school .

I'm a real nice guy ..honestly !!

Please excuse my obsessiveness  any poor spelling / grammar ....it comes with Aspergers , sadly .

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## Vypyrz

> Any advice I have suggested / posted has either been from my experiences or my friends .


Some people either forget, or fail to realize, that there are no "set in stone" rules to reptile keeping, and that most everything that is suggested, or recommended is based on someones experience, and they are quick to criticize any suggestion, recommendation, or opinion that is different, or not in keeping with the status quo. 

It looks like you have a nice collection... :Good Job:

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MontyAndMelissa (04-16-2015)

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## Ransack

How do you like the Garter snakes? I am thinking of getting some in the future?

Also don't sweat the people flipping out, everybody is an expert, lol.

Edit: If you are talking specifically about the soaking snake thread, really don't sweat it. I actually don't soak my snakes but if my snake is covered in crap, I'm washing it, not up for debate.

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_Sonny1318_ (04-07-2015)

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## Zincubus

> How do you like the Garter snakes? I am thinking of getting some in the future?
> 
> Also don't sweat the people flipping out, everybody is an expert, lol.
> 
> Edit: If you are talking specifically about the soaking snake thread, really don't sweat it. I actually don't soak my snakes but if my snake is covered in crap, I'm washing it, not up for debate.


Actually there's been a few times that I've felt a bit uncomfortable to be honest .. I wouldn't mind if I'd come in here all guns blazing , saying I was an expert but anything I've said or suggested was done in good faith with a view to help or share an experience . I just saw an undesirable pattern emerging . I won't stay where I'm not made welcome . 
I've already decided not to post any advice or make any further suggestions as my confidence is simply not high enough to take any further criticism / questioning .

I'll just offer the odd opinion ( positive only ) on the various beaut snake pictures that regularly appear in here .

As to my Garter snakes I'm actuality reluctant to share my view on them to be honest . I'll keep it simple . They are real entertainers and seem to have no faults ..

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_AbsoluteApril_ (02-21-2016)

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## Running Elk

Since you brought it up...

This is coming from a recent post of yours, the tone of which really got under my skin. I can't speak for everyone, but I'm going to go out on a limb here based on what I observed. I saw this post and wanted to reflect a bit.

It's not that you come off as pretending to be an 'expert'. It's acting morally superior because you don't agree with some of the practices other people use. It's okay to disagree, but when you come in, guns blazing, calling people out for being 'morally inferior' because they don't do things the same way as you, you're only going to make enemies, even from people who do agree with you. Talking of "lowering yourself" to practices that you know many people use, and then chalking it up to cultural inadequacy is a very strong notion that is going to GREATLY upset a lot of people.

For example, I feed frozen as much as I can to any of my snakes who will take frozen, which is currently all of them. Some of my newer snakes have come to me eating live, and I have to work them over to frozen -- usually starting with live (if I really have to), then pre-killed (from a spinal dislocation, which seems to be the fastest method -- I think thumping and gassing are less ethical methods), and then to frozen. I raise show mice and have had most types of rodents available in the pet trade at some point or another -- so I value rodents as animals. I do think feeding frozen is a better option in many ways, personally. Had your 'debate' on the issue been simply that -- a constructive debate, asking people politely why they choose to feed live in order to come up with answers/feedback to your questions concerning cultural differences that DO exist, I might have sided with you, seeing as I feed frozen at all costs and have worked painstakingly to convert all of my snakes to frozen. But when you come in accusing people of being lesser than you, and being somehow morally inept, I can't side with you on account of the rudeness and arrogance. 

You're entitled to your own opinions, but use some tact. Humble your voice. That's how you get respect.

A lot of the people in this forum are American. Our animal ethics are culturally different than European animal ethics. It's just a different culture, for better or for worse. A lot of reptile people are conservative, perhaps partially because the AR movement here is associated with being far-left (somehow -- some of us lefties still keep animals and understand the different between animal welfare and animal rights. Any good keeper cares about the welfare of their animals -- most/all of the people on this forum have a deep love and respect for snakes that brings us together so that we can learn, teach, and share our passion). This is going to make the reception of judgmental-sounding AResque rhetoric even more negative. We're (Americans) fighting a loosing battle against policies that want to essentially outlaw any pet except cats and dogs, pretty much. Opening a very condescendingly worded thread about 'morally inferior' animal welfare practices is going to irritate a red-hot rash that already exists -- not a good idea. Save your judgmental anti-live feeding rant for the Irish forum. People (Americans) are sensitive to that kind of lingo, because here the same people that spout that rhetoric also support things like the Lacey Act. With the mass banning of reptiles being a constant threat, coming on here with AR rhetoric is going to cause tension -- as the reptile community is currently the most at risk from proposed ignorant AR policies. 

I am autistic as well. I understand how difficult it is to communicate with other people in a way that's not rude or awkward. I understand that you probably don't think you're being rude, but you are. Tact is something I've had to learn and still struggle with, so I get it -- I honestly do. But if you want to feel welcome, ask questions that aren't loaded, get to know people, and respect that husbandry practices differ slightly among different cultures and different keepers. You don't have to like the practices that everyone here uses, but understand that we all have the utmost interest in our animals' welfare and success, even if our methods vary from person to person. This should be a place to share our passion and expertise/experience, as well as a safe place to ask questions and not feel judged. 

If you're seriously inquiring as to the hostile/cold reception you perceive getting from members here, I hope that this post helps you.

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_Albert Clark_ (04-10-2015),AmandaJ (04-09-2015),amozo (04-09-2015),DC+loki (04-08-2015),Megg (02-21-2016),Rainstar (04-07-2015),SamSimon (03-15-2016),SnakeBalls (04-07-2015)

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## M.P.C

welcome to the forum again. after reading threw that frozen vs live debate you started running elk is 100% correct, you CANNOT come onto a forum to start a discussion and then talk down to everyone that dosent side with your point of view.... thats going to get alot of  people against you real real fast and then you have no one to blame but your self not everyone else for taking offense to the way you were talking to and down to them, one should NEVER start a discussion about anything if they arent open to the other side of the discussion

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_Albert Clark_ (04-10-2015),Running Elk (04-07-2015)

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## Zincubus

Well ..... To be fair I have already apologised for any rudeness , inconsiderate comments or misunderstandings -   in the appropriate threads .
As I mentioned , I have never and could never hurt any creature and just find live feeding abhorrent . It is clearly partly a cultural thing as well as a personal issue .  I've also mentioned above that I'm Autistic and sometimes run into bits of bother on many other forums  .... being obsessive and having pretty extreme views on just about everything is clearly part of the issue .

Also the other day I promised to avoid  any of the existing and any NEW threads concerning  LIVE feeding and I  have stuck  rigidly to my word .

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DC+loki (04-08-2015),Running Elk (04-07-2015)

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## Zincubus

> welcome to the forum again. after reading threw that frozen vs live debate you started running elk is 100% correct, you CANNOT come onto a forum to start a discussion and then talk down to everyone that dosent side with your point of view.... thats going to get alot of  people against you real real fast and then you have no one to blame but your self not everyone else for taking offense to the way you were talking to and down to them, one should NEVER start a discussion about anything if they arent open to the other side of the discussion


Part of my problem is clearly the way I phrase things in text as I am absolutely fine,  face to face with somebody .

I also don't mean to " talk down " to anyone ..... I'm known for treating everyone equal in life and I'd treat the poor homeless guy sat begging in the town exactly the same as I'd treat my best friend ...

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Running Elk (04-07-2015)

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## Asherah

You don't happen to be Sheldon Cooper in disguise as a snake owner do you? These threads are Big Bang Theory-ish. 
 :Smile:  

I've been watching things unfold quietly from the sides and feel like coming out of my lurking status. 

In all seriousness just take a step back and give yourself a moment to reflect and gather yourself. You have a condition that makes it difficult for you to catch the tone of a conversation so therefore it makes it doubly important that you really evaluate and think about what your saying. You are aware of this condition, but it seems as if you are using it as a catch all excuse for behaving badly rather than taking responsibility for the issues. Your comments are in general lacking empathy and totally refusing to see anyone else's side of the conversation. That doesn't make it a debate that makes it you ranting about a cause that you have suddenly turned into a "holier than thou" trip. 

You don't agree with live feeding? Great, don't feed live, but that doesn't mean that others will choose to do the same thing you did. It does not give you the right to belittle people for their choices.

You feel you are being attacked. Terribly sorry about that sensation, but you must also take some responsibility for that, considering the comments you also made. Some of those were not very nice either. 

I'm not saying you are totally in the wrong, you were trying to start a debate that didn't go so well, but you aren't totally in the right here either.

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Herpo (02-21-2016),Running Elk (04-07-2015)

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## John1982

A forum would be entirely boring if everyone shared the same opinions. That said, it seems like you've already pinpointed the problem in your posts. You just have to work on that delivery a bit because we're ALL mere mortals here. 




> and I've NEVER had lower myself to feeding LIVE !


As live is an acceptable option for folks in the states it's going to remain a viable suggestion for getting people's snakes to feed. I think you would make a valuable asset for offering advice on getting those snakes to take f/t if you can do it without belittling others while pushing your agenda. It sounds like it was unintentional though so maybe just work on not getting so defensive. If a lot of folks are getting heated about something you say maybe it's a clue for you to go back and reread it a couple times.

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AmandaJ (04-09-2015),DC+loki (04-08-2015),Running Elk (04-07-2015)

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## Zincubus

Well I won't be frequenting the LIVE feeding threads so I've taken the main issue out  of the equation . I spent many, many hours worrying and fretting after things got a bit heated the other day as I actually hate any kind of ill feeling  .

Part of the problem started when someone said something about me having a big brain and they were clearly being sarcastic judging by the tone of their post. Another guy suggested in a PM that I was a fool for having my beliefs on feeding . Things like that tend to make me get a little tetchy ...... I never try to start a battle but I certainly won't run from one either .

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## jclaiborne

I was bored so I spent about 5 minutes flipping through some of the posts you have made and already see why things are a "bit shakey".  Everyone has already pointed it out to you so there is no need to dive into that anymore, but honestly this thread that you created seems like you are looking for people to go "aww he really is a nice guy" etc.  Anyone can create a thread and apologize/justify their actions.  A change in attitude will speak louder than you talking about yourself.  Just my 2 cents.

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## Zincubus

> I was bored so I spent about 5 minutes flipping through some of the posts you have made and already see why things are a "bit shakey".  Everyone has already pointed it out to you so there is no need to dive into that anymore, but honestly this thread that you created seems like you are looking for people to go "aww he really is a nice guy" etc.  Anyone can create a thread and apologize/justify their actions.  A change in attitude will speak louder than you talking about yourself.  Just my 2 cents.


Fair points .... although you notice I started this thread  about 3 months ago ..... nothing to do with the recent eruptions ...

As to a change in attitude ..... maybe difficult as I will never change my stance on live feeding ..... as an Autistic Aspie I'm kinda " wired up" differently than you "normal" folk and so if something riles me I maybe select the wrong wordings or phrases to make a point. Also as I mentioned , if someone antagonises me I rarely back down. I'd also bet many of my ' suspect' posts were written in the early hours or very late in the evening when  I wasn't thinking quite as rationally as I should .

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## Zincubus

> It looks like you have a nice collection...


Thanks , I'm up 18 now as I've recently added a beautiful female adult Blizzard Corn snake ...

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## PitOnTheProwl

> Well I won't be frequenting the LIVE feeding threads so I've taken the main issue out  of the equation . I spent many, many hours worrying and fretting after things got a bit heated the other day as I actually hate any kind of ill feeling  .
> 
> Part of the problem started when someone said something about me having a big brain and they were clearly being sarcastic judging by the tone of their post. *Another guy suggested in a PM that I was a fool for having my beliefs on feeding* . Things like that tend to make me get a little tetchy ...... I never try to start a battle but I certainly won't run from one either .


Staring off, IF someone is attacking you privately that is a battle for one of us MODs to handle.
That is something that is sad and cowardly, IF they had to PM it then they know its something that shouldn't have been said in the first place.

Second, you have to be armed to stand in the battle. Im not going to has it up here but I am just trying to get the point into your thick head that if you have no experience with it then you have no credibility talking about it. You don't see me posting about thermo quantum physics for a reason, I am just plain white trash redneck and proud of it.  :Salute: 

As far as hurting another animal, you should really look at how those f/t are made. Im not just talking about the kill either.  :Wink: 

There are no "ill feelings" here. This is part of a job here for the members and I don't take anyone here that I do not personally know to heart.

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Citrus (04-20-2015)

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## Zincubus

> Staring off, IF someone is attacking you privately that is a battle for one of us MODs to handle.
> That is something that is sad and cowardly, IF they had to PM it then they know its something that shouldn't have been said in the first place.
> 
> Second, you have to be armed to stand in the battle. Im not going to has it up here but I am just trying to get the point into your thick head that if you have no experience with it then you have no credibility talking about it. You don't see me posting about thermo quantum physics for a reason, I am just plain white trash redneck and proud of it. 
> 
> As far as hurting another animal, you should really look at how those f/t are made. Im not just talking about the kill either. 
> 
> There are no "ill feelings" here. This is part of a job here for the members and I don't take anyone here that I do not personally know to heart.


You see , you've just referred to my " thick head " .... that's kinda the thing that I was talking about and the type of comment that winds me up especially that considering my tested IQ - the comment couldn't be more incorrect .

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## PitOnTheProwl

> You see , you've just referred to my " thick head " .... that's kinda the thing that I was talking about and the type of comment that winds me up especially that considering my tested IQ - the comment couldn't be more incorrect .


Maybe you need to learn the meaning of some common phrases first....................... 
Take it how you want but you are hardheaded and STUBORN. 
Im done trying to get on level ground with you.
For some reason all you want to do is bump heads and I can promise you that mine is a lot harder.

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## 200xth

> You see , you've just referred to my " thick head " .... that's kinda the thing that I was talking about and the type of comment that winds me up especially that considering my tested IQ - the comment couldn't be more incorrect .


So you don't like that, but you have no problem starting things off telling everyone they are unreasonable, wrong, insensible, barbaric, and you'd have to lower yourself to do things they do like feed live?

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## DVirginiana

> You see , you've just referred to my " thick head " .... that's kinda the thing that I was talking about and the type of comment that winds me up especially that considering my tested IQ - the comment couldn't be more incorrect .


Being thick-headed has nothing to do with intelligence; it has to do with you not getting a point when others have explicitly explained it to you and continuing to say/do something when you've been given evidence to the contrary.  It means you're stubborn, not stupid.

If you really are bothered by the negative commentary as much as you say you are and legitimately can't understand why your comments come off as judgmental, then maybe you should just stay away from live-feeding threads.  I'm not trying to tell you you can't comment on them or anything like that, just that it sounds like you'd be happier if you didn't since you can't seem to find a happy medium of expressing yourself in a way that this community finds acceptable on that issue.

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Running Elk (04-09-2015)

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## Lizardlicks

Oh for god....

My Daughter is autistic, eight of my best friends are on the spectrum, and most of them have told me that I have aspie traits enough that I should consider going to get a formal diagnosis.  Absolutely none of that prevents me or them from carefully considering reasoned stances and adding new points of view to our assessment matrix.  Please, don't use your diagnosis as a way to excuse being a condescending jerk, it makes the rest of us look bad.

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_200xth_ (04-08-2015),AmandaJ (04-09-2015),anicatgirl (04-08-2015),_HVani_ (04-08-2015),_jclaiborne_ (04-08-2015)

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## Asherah

"normal"

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## Zincubus

> Maybe you need to learn the meaning of some common phrases first....................... 
> Take it how you want but you are hardheaded and STUBORN. 
> Im done trying to get on level ground with you.
> For some reason all you want to do is bump heads and I can promise you that mine is a lot harder.


With all due respect , again this could simply be a cultural thing , but if someone over here in the UK referred to you having a thick head or as " being thick " it would be taken as an serious insult .

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## Zincubus

Error ....

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## Zincubus

> Being thick-headed has nothing to do with intelligence; it has to do with you not getting a point when others have explicitly explained it to you and continuing to say/do something when you've been given evidence to the contrary.  It means you're stubborn, not stupid.
> 
> If you really are bothered by the negative commentary as much as you say you are and legitimately can't understand why your comments come off as judgmental, then maybe you should just stay away from live-feeding threads.  I'm not trying to tell you you can't comment on them or anything like that, just that it sounds like you'd be happier if you didn't since you can't seem to find a happy medium of expressing yourself in a way that this community finds acceptable on that issue.





> Being thick-headed has nothing to do with intelligence; it has to do with you not getting a point when others have explicitly explained it to you and continuing to say/do something when you've been given evidence to the contrary.  It means you're stubborn, not stupid.
> 
> If you really are bothered by the negative commentary as much as you say you are and legitimately can't understand why your comments come off as judgmental, then maybe you should just stay away from live-feeding threads.  I'm not trying to tell you you can't comment on them or anything like that, just that it sounds like you'd be happier if you didn't since you can't seem to find a happy medium of expressing yourself in a way that this community finds acceptable on that issue.




As I just explained in the UK calling someone " thick headed " is the same as calling someone " thick " or " stupid" .... that's why I took offence at the " thick" comment .

As to " staying away from the live feeding threads " it is something I said I would do a couple of days ago and I have successfully avoided ALL  the live feeding threads since . I've mentioned this point repeatedly in recent posts .

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## Zincubus

> Oh for god....
> 
> My Daughter is autistic, eight of my best friends are on the spectrum, and most of them have told me that I have aspie traits enough that I should consider going to get a formal diagnosis.  Absolutely none of that prevents me or them from carefully considering reasoned stances and adding new points of view to our assessment matrix.  Please, don't use your diagnosis as a way to excuse being a condescending jerk, it makes the rest of us look bad.


As you know so many autistics you will be aware of the fact that we / they are all so very , different and behave / react to things very differently whilst at the same time sharing a basic umbrella of Autustic traits ....

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## anicatgirl

OK cookie I've read a lot of what has been said over the last while, and here's my  :twocents:  

I get that lots of people are different. Culturally, experience wise, etc. No one here is really out to get you, I promise (except for maybe those PMs, some folks are jerks). Much of this site is debate and education, whether about feeding, or proper temps (which seems to vary slightly), to the "can my snake love me" bit. I get that you maybe process stuff differently than some people. But don't automatically assume that if someone says "thick headed" or something that it means what you think it means coming from them. There are likely to be some translation errors in slang terms and the like. Ask, don't assume  :Roll Eyes (Sarcastic): 

I also get that you're intelligent, but that being said, it would really help your case if it didn't sound like there was some moral high ground to hold here. Due to the differences in culture or whatever that's how it reads sometimes. And you, like the rest of people, would be offended if I said I held the moral high ground for any reason, in regard to how you keep your snakes.

Anyhow, just my thoughts, cause I've been pondering the situation for awhile.

Looking forward to seeing some pics introducing your scaly family  :Very Happy:  :Snake:

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SnakeBalls (04-08-2015)

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## Zincubus

> OK cookie I've read a lot of what has been said over the last while, and here's my  
> 
> I get that lots of people are different. Culturally, experience wise, etc. No one here is really out to get you, I promise (except for maybe those PMs, some folks are jerks). Much of this site is debate and education, whether about feeding, or proper temps (which seems to vary slightly), to the "can my snake love me" bit. I get that you maybe process stuff differently than some people. But don't automatically assume that if someone says "thick headed" or something that it means what you think it means coming from them. There are likely to be some translation errors in slang terms and the like. Ask, don't assume 
> 
> I also get that you're intelligent, but that being said, it would really help your case if it didn't sound like there was some moral high ground to hold here. Due to the differences in culture or whatever that's how it reads sometimes. And you, like the rest of people, would be offended if I said I held the moral high ground for any reason, in regard to how you keep your snakes.
> 
> Anyhow, just my thoughts, cause I've been pondering the situation for awhile.
> 
> Looking forward to seeing some pics introducing your scaly family


Well thank you for at least understanding my problems and issues , somewhat .. 
On this forum I seem to be on the defensive all the time which isn't at all pleasant ...  It makes a nice change to get a normal response .

On the point about photos .... I think I've already posted a few up in here in various threads . There's certainly a couple of my  Snow Boa and maybe a couple of others . ...  I'd be reluctant to post any more in the future as I appear to be public enemy No1 and I daren't even imagine some of the comments the photos ' may' receive .

I have apologised repeatedly for any upset I have caused in the live feeding threads and as I promised days ago I have refrained from participating in all the live feeding threads .

Thank you !

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## Zincubus

I'm seriously  considering just being a lurker and observing the interesting threads but not contributing . It will probably suit all concerned parties .

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## Zincubus

> You don't happen to be Sheldon Cooper in disguise as a snake owner do you? These threads are Big Bang Theory-ish. 
>  
> 
> I've been watching things unfold quietly from the sides and feel like coming out of my lurking status. 
> 
> In all seriousness just take a step back and give yourself a moment to reflect and gather yourself. You have a condition that makes it difficult for you to catch the tone of a conversation so therefore it makes it doubly important that you really evaluate and think about what your saying. You are aware of this condition, but it seems as if you are using it as a catch all excuse for behaving badly rather than taking responsibility for the issues. Your comments are in general lacking empathy and totally refusing to see anyone else's side of the conversation. That doesn't make it a debate that makes it you ranting about a cause that you have suddenly turned into a "holier than thou" trip. 
> 
> You don't agree with live feeding? Great, don't feed live, but that doesn't mean that others will choose to do the same thing you did. It does not give you the right to belittle people for their choices.
> 
> ...




Funnily enough Big Bang is possibly my fave comedy series ... I only find American comedy series funny as the British comedy series are 99% garbage in comparison . Sheldon is obviously my favourite TV character and I can relate to him so very easily  :Smile:

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## anicatgirl

I understand being on the defensive. I've gotten some ridiculous responses on my Facebook from PETA people, which you may or may not know of. "Animal rights activists" really using their status to destroy pets and such. Any of their BS puts me on the defensive.

Aaaanywho. Just post a thread of photos  :Very Happy:  I and a bunch of other people would look at them. And anyone who has mean things to say to pretty snakes should just get off the forum. You kinda jumped deep into the debate pool and skipped the "Look guys here are my awesome reptiles!!!" part. 

I know you've apologized. I've read. And to you that is correct and totally makes sense. Some people may have a hard time believing it because of what they have perceived as your "attitude." Just prove them wrong if you choose to continue posting. Keep an open mind friend  :Good Job:

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## SnakeBalls

Let me ask you this Zinc....do you like fishsticks?

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## Zincubus

> I understand being on the defensive. I've gotten some ridiculous responses on my Facebook from PETA people, which you may or may not know of. "Animal rights activists" really using their status to destroy pets and such. Any of their BS puts me on the defensive.
> 
> Aaaanywho. Just post a thread of photos  I and a bunch of other people would look at them. And anyone who has mean things to say to pretty snakes should just get off the forum. You kinda jumped deep into the debate pool and skipped the "Look guys here are my awesome reptiles!!!" part. 
> 
> I know you've apologized. I've read. And to you that is correct and totally makes sense. Some people may have a hard time believing it because of what they have perceived as your "attitude." Just prove them wrong if you choose to continue posting. Keep an open mind friend


Thanks .. A quick look at my profile will show that I've received many thanks on my previous post history with just a minority of 'dislikes ' .
I certainly never set out to earn  this cartoon- like  ' bad guy ' label I have acquired over LiveFeedGate .

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anicatgirl (04-08-2015)

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## Zincubus

> Let me ask you this Zinc....do you like fishsticks?


To be honest again .... I have no idea what they are. .. ..

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## anicatgirl

Weeelll they are basically compressed, breaded, and either baked or fried fish. In the unnatural form of about 2cm by 10cm stick of "fish". I dunno how this applies lol, SnakeBalls. 

What do you like to eat? On that note. You may have to educate some on your home  :Confused:

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## Zincubus

> Weeelll they are basically compressed, breaded, and either baked or fried fish. In the unnatural form of about 2cm by 10cm stick of "fish". I dunno how this applies lol, SnakeBalls. 
> 
> What do you like to eat? On that note. You may have to educate some on your home


Ahh ... We in the UK call them Fish Fingers and they are something I do have occasionally ... 

I like ' many ' autistics have a very narrow list of things I eat . 
I have the same breakfast and supper and usually the  same  dinners / lunch EVERYDAY !
I have a different evening meal as I have that meal with my good wife and she likes a bit of variety  :Smile: 

No idea why we are discussing food though  :Smile:

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## anicatgirl

Meh. Curiosity on my part. I enjoy talking to people from different places.  :Very Happy:

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## SnakeBalls

A simple experiment/joke, just trying to lighten the situation  :Smile:

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## Zincubus

> A simple experiment/joke, just trying to lighten the situation


Ah .... I'm not familiar with that series ... Family Guy / American Dad ??

The only cartoons I enjoy are pretty old apart from possibly Duckman and to a lesser extent The Simpsons ..

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## HVani

> A simple experiment/joke, just trying to lighten the situation


My favorite episode of South Park.   :Smile:

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## Zincubus

> Meh. Curiosity on my part. I enjoy talking to people from different places.


Sorry ..  My last sentence about discussing food wasn't meant for you ,  it was really aimed at SnakeBalls who has just explained.

----------

anicatgirl (04-08-2015)

----------


## Running Elk

> I was bored so I spent about 5 minutes flipping through some of the posts you have made and already see why things are a "bit shakey".  Everyone has already pointed it out to you so there is no need to dive into that anymore, but honestly this thread that you created seems like you are looking for people to go "aww he really is a nice guy" etc.  Anyone can create a thread and apologize/justify their actions.  A change in attitude will speak louder than you talking about yourself.  Just my 2 cents.


Actually, if he's somewhat socially inept (due to his autism) as he stated in the first post (I am too, for similar/the same reasons) then I can vouch that when you get yourself into a social situations that become too hot for you to handle, and have anxiety over it, sometimes the only thing you can think to do is apologize. It sounds like he experienced anxiety over the reaction to his F/T thread. It's not easy to know how to 'do the right thing' in social situations when you view the world/function very differently from most people. I can't speak for him, but in my situation, there isn't a social que that naturally makes sense -- it was something I had to work very hard to learn and have to think about very hard to know how to react to. Most social norms/situations absolutely are baffling. When you upset people, you don't always know why or what it is you did, but you do feel bad and you don't want to upset people.

I apologize constantly to people. I often say or do 'abnormal' things in a social situation, or state a bold opinion with bluntness that's considered rude, and by the time it's over and people have forgotten/gotten over it...I haven't, and I blurt out an apology that makes it way more awkward. Sometimes I apologize for that apology. 

I agree with your point, actions speak louder than words, but this post might be sincere albeit awkward, and not a ploy for attention or forgiveness. Saying sorry is also awkward, it'd probably be easier for him to just leave and go to a different forum. I feel like apologizing and showing interest in people not being angry with him is probably a fairly sincere gesture. He also wanted suggestions, and seemed interested in feedback as to why people felt the way they did. It takes cojones to open yourself up knowing you might get torn apart for it.

If I thought he was just a jerk I wouldn't have even bothered to reply to this thread (if he was just a jerk I'm not sure he would have bothered to post it). But when someone doesn't innately do very well in social situations explaining what they did that was upsetting is key for improvement. And he asked, because if he's anything like me, sometimes you have to ask to know. Much of what I've learned came from awkward asking.

----------

AmandaJ (04-09-2015),anicatgirl (04-09-2015),Creepy Alien (02-21-2016),Zincubus (02-28-2016)

----------


## Running Elk

But that putting the world 'live' in all caps though. Ugh, that drives me nuts for come reason.  :twocents:

----------


## Zincubus

> But that putting the world 'live' in all caps though. Ugh, that drives me nuts for come reason.



My reason for capitalising 'live' was just to highlight the 'act' to be honest . The recent thread " Mouse bit my snake " has some interesting comments in it . Considering it is apparently so safe and natural and risk free it's kinda odd how many seem quite at ease giving out advice on how to treat the bites on the snake - almost as though these things are common place.  Quite a few gory stories surfaced in there , just a pity they didn't contribute to the live feeding threads I was struggling in , I'm guessing peer pressure .

----------


## Zincubus

> Actually, if he's somewhat socially inept (due to his autism) as he stated in the first post (I am too, for similar/the same reasons) then I can vouch that when you get yourself into a social situations that become too hot for you to handle, and have anxiety over it, sometimes the only thing you can think to do is apologize. It sounds like he experienced anxiety over the reaction to his F/T thread. It's not easy to know how to 'do the right thing' in social situations when you view the world/function very differently from most people. I can't speak for him, but in my situation, there isn't a social que that naturally makes sense -- it was something I had to work very hard to learn and have to think about very hard to know how to react to. Most social norms/situations absolutely are baffling. When you upset people, you don't always know why or what it is you did, but you do feel bad and you don't want to upset people.
> 
> I apologize constantly to people. I often say or do 'abnormal' things in a social situation, or state a bold opinion with bluntness that's considered rude, and by the time it's over and people have forgotten/gotten over it...I haven't, and I blurt out an apology that makes it way more awkward. Sometimes I apologize for that apology. 
> 
> I agree with your point, actions speak louder than words, but this post might be sincere albeit awkward, and not a ploy for attention or forgiveness. Saying sorry is also awkward, it'd probably be easier for him to just leave and go to a different forum. I feel like apologizing and showing interest in people not being angry with him is probably a fairly sincere gesture. He also wanted suggestions, and seemed interested in feedback as to why people felt the way they did. It takes cojones to open yourself up knowing you might get torn apart for it.
> 
> If I thought he was just a jerk I wouldn't have even bothered to reply to this thread (if he was just a jerk I'm not sure he would have bothered to post it). But when someone doesn't innately do very well in social situations explaining what they did that was upsetting is key for improvement. And he asked, because if he's anything like me, sometimes you have to ask to know. Much of what I've learned came from awkward asking.


Thank you so much for taking the time to write all that !  It's a wonderful post and very insightful .

----------


## anicatgirl

Well I offered my advice simply as what I know to treat any snake wounds. Mine has never been hurt by a feeder. But I also make sure I know how to deal with injuries before they happen.

----------


## Zincubus

> Well I offered my advice simply as what I know to treat any snake wounds. Mine has never been hurt by a feeder. But I also make sure I know how to deal with injuries before they happen.


Funnily enough I was actually thinking of a couple of the other contributors  , one mentioned that he's treated many other far worse bites than the one shown .......   it's very wise to be prepared as you are .

----------


## John1982

> The recent thread " Mouse bit my snake " has some interesting comments in it . Considering it is apparently so safe and natural and risk free it's kinda odd how many seem quite at ease giving out advice on how to treat the bites on the snake - almost as though these things are common place.  Quite a few gory stories surfaced in there , just a pity they didn't contribute to the live feeding threads I was struggling in , I'm guessing peer pressure .


If you reread the first post in that thread you'll see that the OP was not monitoring the feed very closely. Besides this, that bite is about the equivalent of a skinned knee on a kid. Just because you treat something doesn't make it a life threatening catastrophe. Superficial damage that heals completely after a few sheds doesn't much count in my book. 

Now, pictures like that would make acceptable ammunition for your anti-live campaigns. At least it's a "wound" that occurred during a feeding time strike unlike your last choice. Just have to find a way to spin this out of proportion and make it seem like that snake is on death's door.

----------

_jclaiborne_ (04-09-2015)

----------


## Foxton

> My reason for capitalising 'live' was just to highlight the 'act' to be honest . The recent thread " Mouse bit my snake " has some interesting comments in it . Considering it is apparently so safe and natural and risk free it's kinda odd how many seem quite at ease giving out advice on how to treat the bites on the snake - almost as though these things are common place.  Quite a few gory stories surfaced in there , just a pity they didn't contribute to the live feeding threads I was struggling in , I'm guessing peer pressure .


It's only interesting because you can find something that fits your agenda. So do you really care about the snake that got a small nibble or because you think you can take advantage of it to score imaginary internet points?

----------

_jclaiborne_ (04-09-2015)

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## Zincubus

> If you reread the first post in that thread you'll see that the OP was not monitoring the feed very closely. Besides this, that bite is about the equivalent of a skinned knee on a kid. Just because you treat something doesn't make it a life threatening catastrophe. Superficial damage that heals completely after a few sheds doesn't much count in my book. 
> 
> Now, pictures like that would make acceptable ammunition for your anti-live campaigns. At least it's a "wound" that occurred during a feeding time strike unlike your last choice. Just have to find a way to spin this out of proportion and make it seem like that snake is on death's door.


It's nothing to do with spinning anything out of proportion I was just passing an opinion on the various posts in the thread  ....  We could say that you are actually making light of the situation if we are playing that game .  If I did want to add fuel to the fire I could have posted something provocative but I refrained from doing that very thing , as I promised I wouldn't get involved in any live feeding discussions . Incidentally , there's also a post mentioning many , worse bites to a keeper's snakes and there's another post describing the many varying injuries seen caused by rodent bites.


 If I'm being totally honest , I'm still bemused by the whole live feeding thing ..... experienced people worry about their snakes , what and when to feed , where best to feed , the humidity and temperature levels , the substrate , the amount of room they have and even  types of lighting etc etc etc . 

So we all go through all this trouble and worry to keep out precious animals healthy and happy and then some go and drop a live , proven killing machine ( adult rat ) who's going to fight for it's life INTO an enclosed area WITH the snake .

----------


## Zincubus

> It's only interesting because you can find something that fits your agenda. So do you really care about the snake that got a small nibble or because you think you can take advantage of it to score imaginary internet points?


Well if you'd read my previous posts you'd see that I promised to not get involved in any more live feeding debates as this forum as obviously this isn't the place to discuss such sensitive matters . I absolutely care about the health of the snake , that's my main priority, it was just lucky that it took a lump out of it's side rather than puncturing  one of its eyes which was just as possible.

----------


## Zincubus

> Now, pictures like that would make acceptable ammunition for your anti-live campaigns. At least it's a "wound" that occurred during a feeding time strike unlike your last choice. Just have to find a way to spin this out of proportion and make it seem like that snake is on death's door.


As I said at the time , that horrendous injury to the Royal python ( in the photo I posted ) actually  WAS an injury from live feeding - albeit unattended which I'm fairly certain some still do given the time constraints of our modern lives .

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## John1982

> As I said at the time , that horrendous injury to the Royal python ( in the photo I posted ) actually  WAS an injury from live feeding - albeit unattended which I'm fairly certain some still do given the time constraints of our modern lives .


Wrong, just because the keeper thought it was a feeding doesn't make it so. A proper feeding of live includes a snake in hunt mode, appropriate prey(size and type), appropriate offering method, appropriate supervision. I'm 100% certain some of these integral pieces of the puzzle were missing and wouldn't be surprised if all were. If you don't have time to turn off the stove, have a bowl of cereal.   

Since you seem to know so much about the situation surrounding the original photo please post a link so I can enlighten myself. I found the bit on the irish forums but they just posted the pictured saying it was from some american forum with no further details. They didn't even know if it was a rat or mouse injury - just some rodent.

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_200xth_ (04-09-2015),_jclaiborne_ (04-09-2015),PitOnTheProwl (04-09-2015)

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## John1982

I think you'll find it challenging to find the original source for most of these "feeding massacre" pictures. Out of millions of snake photos on the internet there are only a handful of these chewed up shots available. The pickings for anti-live propaganda pictures are so slim that available material has been regurgitated to the extent that the original source is all but impossible to locate. If and when you do find some I think you'll see that in every occurence a rodent was left for an extended period of time with the snake, unsupervised. Again, this is not a "feeding" as any responsible keeper knows.

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_200xth_ (04-09-2015),AmandaJ (04-09-2015)

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## scalrtn

I have absolutely no problem with live feeding, but I do have a problem with people who post live feeding videos to YouTube or Vimeo, particularly with heavy metal music playing in the background (where an animal's death is apparently being celebrated).  I also have a problem with people feeding captive ball pythons to North American kingsnakes, whether they post videos or not.  That's just my opinion, you're entitled to yours.

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## goddessbaby

Zinc,  welcome to the forum. I read every post and I think running elk has had some particularly insightful things to say on this thread. I hope you continue to enjoy the forum and share your photos. I spend most of my time here keeping my opinion to myself on husbandry/feeding but feel free to comment on pictures/questions. I think it's unfair to bring a live vs f/t debate to this thread when the OP has stated numerous times that he has avoided commenting on those threads specifically for this reason. Everyone has an opinion, any animal can kill another animal. There's no need to shove it in the OP's face when there has already been posts where people provided input on how to set a positive tone and get positive feedback going forward.

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## 200xth

> a live , proven killing machine ( adult rat ) who's going to fight for it's life INTO an enclosed area WITH the snake .


More irrational fear mongering from a person who has never once fed a live animal to a snake.

Attempting to scare newbies into agreeing with you because they don't know better and it makes you feel better is a pretty poor thing to do.

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## jclaiborne

Here are my thoughts on live feeding.  At this point I don't do if for a simple reason.  My Tegu and Childrens Python both readily accept F/T so it is easier for me to keep a stock pile in the freezer.  When I first started keeping snakes as a kid there really wasn't any place around me that sold F/T so I had to feed live (which meant weekly trips to the shop to get a mouse).  Before I even got my first snake the store owner told me that feeding live wasn't just throwing the mouse/rat in the tank and walking away.  He said "you have to watch and be ready to interject if something goes wrong, and possibly take a bite from either animal.  If you aren't willing to do that, then maybe you want something different."  So from the beginning I was lucky enough to have a reptile shop around me that actually cared.  So for about 5 years I was feeding live and didn't have one accident.  There is a right and wrong way to do everything.

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AmandaJ (04-09-2015)

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## SCWood

On am off-note, thank you to everyone who is patient and acknowledges the fact that, yes, Aspergers DOES effect the way we communicate. For the longest time, I have been afraid to mention it and I know some of my posts about my animal care come on strong or seem awkward but I can't help it x.x So, thank you for your educated, non-judgmental responses. 

1.2 Normal
1.1 Red-tail
0.1 Albino corn

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## Stewart_Reptiles

*Can we please not turn this thread to another f/t vs live debate?

BTW this is not a request but a first and FINAL warning any additional feeding posts in this thread will be removed and merged to the already existing one.

*

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anicatgirl (04-09-2015),PitOnTheProwl (04-09-2015)

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## Zincubus

> On am off-note, thank you to everyone who is patient and acknowledges the fact that, yes, Aspergers DOES effect the way we communicate. For the longest time, I have been afraid to mention it and I know some of my posts about my animal care come on strong or seem awkward but I can't help it x.x So, thank you for your educated, non-judgmental responses. 
> 
> 1.2 Normal
> 1.1 Red-tail
> 0.1 Albino corn


Nice to hear from you ... it's certainly not easy admitting that you / we are different from the " norm "  but I've always been upfront about my Aspergers and most seem to understand or at least cut me a bit of slack , sadly not everyone .

Thankfully there are positives that come with the many negatives as regards to Aspergers .

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## SCWood

Yes! I had a recent diagnosis and was startled to say the least...luckily, my workplace is familiar with it and they actually kind of suspected it already and they don't treat me any differently ^^

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## Zincubus

> Yes! I had a recent diagnosis and was startled to say the least...luckily, my workplace is familiar with it and they actually kind of suspected it already and they don't treat me any differently ^^


Well  funnily enough , there is a website purely for us   " weirdos "       :Smile:  

I've sent you the link via PM .

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## Drake Moonslayer

Welcome to the forums. You should create a post with the pictures of your collection. I would love to see them. Dont stress out over the negative comments. Unfortunatly everywhere you go there are going to be some negative people and/or negative comments made towards you or a thought or idea you may have. In my experience it is better to just ignore them and move on. You should not stop posting just because of a negative situation. I would say doing what you said in staying away from the type of posts and/or conversations that you think might be stressful to yourself or that may start a battle even unintentionally might be the best course of action. But everyone has different knowledge with reguards to the care of their animals and your knowledge may help others and/or at least provide other views, options and experiences that people newer to reptiles may not have and may need.

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## PitOnTheProwl

> Nice to hear from you ... it's certainly not easy admitting that you / we are different from the " norm "  but I've always been upfront about my Aspergers and most seem to understand or at least cut me a bit of slack , sadly not everyone .
> 
> Thankfully there are positives that come with the many negatives as regards to Aspergers .


There are some of us that treat everyone equally.
Everything in life consists of choices to everyone.
I don't treat anyone special, here or in my real life.

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_jclaiborne_ (04-09-2015)

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## dr del

> I have absolutely no problem with live feeding, but I do have a problem with people who post live feeding videos to YouTube or Vimeo, particularly with heavy metal music playing in the background (where an animal's death is apparently being celebrated).  I also have a problem with people feeding captive ball pythons to North American kingsnakes, whether they post videos or not.  That's just my opinion, you're entitled to yours.


Just an informational post about the different culture over here;

While live feeding videos don't annoy me in themselves the tone of them is vital over here. Feeding live is *legal* but celebrating the death aspect or using it in a way designed for entertainment is actually *illegal*. Bit of a minefield to judge but if you post a video cheering the snake on and denigrating the mouse, then cheer when the snake kills it, could result in you being prosecuted and prevented from keeping any animal ever again.

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## Zincubus

> Zinc,  welcome to the forum. I read every post and I think running elk has had some particularly insightful things to say on this thread. I hope you continue to enjoy the forum and share your photos. I spend most of my time here keeping my opinion to myself on husbandry/feeding but feel free to comment on pictures/questions. I think it's unfair to bring a live vs f/t debate to this thread when the OP has stated numerous times that he has avoided commenting on those threads specifically for this reason. Everyone has an opinion, any animal can kill another animal. There's no need to shove it in the OP's face when there has already been posts where people provided input on how to set a positive tone and get positive feedback going forward.


Thank you for the kind words ...  I will try and post a few pix  :Smile: 

Here's my proven adult male Snow who's probably the jewel in my collection , certainly the costliest and most valuable money-wise. 

He's the poster- boy Snow Boa of the well respected John Berry Designer Boa Morph books .

He's around 6  years old and approaching 7' long and very calm and friendly .

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_AlexisFitzy_ (02-21-2016)

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## Zincubus

This next one is a unique looking Hybrid . Listed as an Imperial Peublan . 

As I understand he's a mix of a Cali King and a Pueblan Milk .    Has a lovely calm temperament and  he's a CB12.

----------

_AlexisFitzy_ (04-16-2015),PitOnTheProwl (04-09-2015)

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## Zincubus

Next in line is my beautiful Dwarf Hypo Burmese python ... currently about 20" and around 12 month sold . Lovely temperament .

----------

_AlexisFitzy_ (04-16-2015),John1982 (04-09-2015)

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## PitOnTheProwl

I saw that king on your photobucket. 
He is sexxxxxy!!  :Bowdown:

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_AlexisFitzy_ (02-21-2016),Zincubus (04-09-2015)

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## Zincubus

> I saw that king on your photobucket. 
> He is sexxxxxy!!


I've got high hopes for him , he's a beautifully calm and friendly boy and around 24" but when he's much bigger I've been advised by a friend in the TV business that he will be in demand for snake placement in TV plays / commercials and the like - even media events .

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## John1982

I'll always have a soft spot for burms and your hypo is a looker.

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Zincubus (04-09-2015)

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## Drake Moonslayer

I have always been partial to Ball Pythons but you have some beautiful snakes and that is an amazing Imperial Peublan

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## Zincubus

> I'll always have a soft spot for burms and your hypo is a looker.


Thank you ... He's a lovely little lad . I've always loved Burms and Hypo ones in particular but I really can't manage a huge Burm and just got lucky when I came upon this little Dwarf . His Dwarf mum is only 8'  and Dwarf dad is only 5' so I'm hopeful for him staying around 6' .

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## Zincubus

Last up for the time being is my lovely little Rhino Ratsnake .... he's about 6 months old and hasn't developed his adult bright greenish colour as yet.
He's rather cute though , non the less  :Smile:

----------

_AlexisFitzy_ (02-21-2016)

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## Zincubus

> I have always been partial to Ball Pythons but you have some beautiful snakes and that is an amazing Imperial Peublan


Thank you .... he could prove to be priceless as there will NEVER be one exactly the same as him .

Designer morphs are the future  :Smile:

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_AlexisFitzy_ (02-21-2016)

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## M.P.C

> This next one is a unique looking Hybrid . Listed as an Imperial Peublan . 
> 
> As I understand he's a mix of a Cali King and a Pueblan Milk .    Has a lovely calm temperament and  he's a CB12.


That is an absolutly amazing looking snake.... are you saying its a mix of a king snake and a milk snake?  Or is pueblan milk  a  type of king snake  ive some how neglected

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## Zincubus

> That is an absolutly amazing looking snake.... are you saying its a mix of a king snake and a milk snake?  Or is pueblan milk  a  type of king snake  ive some how neglected


Yes it's a mix of a King x Milk  known as an Imperial Peublan  for some reason .

Many people hate hybrids but when they look like this one , I really don't see the problem.

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## Zincubus

> I'll always have a soft spot for burms and your hypo is a looker.


Just found another couple  of him . Crazy to see a Burm not much bigger than a biro / ballpoint pen.

----------

_AlexisFitzy_ (02-21-2016)

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## John1982

> That is an absolutly amazing looking snake.... are you saying its a mix of a king snake and a milk snake?  Or is pueblan milk  a  type of king snake  ive some how neglected


All milk snakes are king snakes but not all king snakes are milk snakes. They're both in the Lampropeltis genus with milk snakes being further classified into the species triangulum. There are plenty of milk snake subspecies but they're all L. t. something-or-other.

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PitOnTheProwl (04-09-2015)

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## anicatgirl

So glad you finally decided to put pics up here!!! They are lovely!!! The Snow Boa was something I hadn't seen before. And that Pueblan is super neat, what a color mix. But I think my fav so far is the Burm. Wow. I want one of those... The full size ones are pretty big, but that dwarf is gorgeous and a good size...  :Bowdown:  :Bowdown:  :Bowdown:

----------


## Zincubus

> So glad you finally decided to put pics up here!!! They are lovely!!! The Snow Boa was something I hadn't seen before. And that Pueblan is super neat, what a color mix. But I think my fav so far is the Burm. Wow. I want one of those... The full size ones are pretty big, but that dwarf is gorgeous and a good size...


Thank you for those kind words  - everyone has been really nice about them as you can see  :Smile: 

 I will try and post the others up at some  stage . 

As regards the Snow Boa he really is spectacular looking ..  I love the kind of motley mix of brilliant white and vibrant yellow tones .. He was the totally white as a hatchling and the brightest , whitest the breeder had ever seen ..... Apparently the Snows all start off totally white and the yellow comes as they age . I prefer it myself as ALL white snakes look rather washed out and bland to my mind .
In Royal / Ball pythons the all white BEL ones do nothing for me at all but I LOVE the Albinos and Pieds !!

Just a matter of taste I guess .

----------

anicatgirl (04-10-2015)

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## jclaiborne

Nice looking collection!  On a side note did I read somewhere that you are in Ireland?

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## Zincubus

> Nice looking collection!  On a side note did I read somewhere that you are in Ireland?


Manchester , England .  ... My son lives in Florida though ...   I frequent the Reptile Community forum ( Irish forum ).

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## Zincubus

> So glad you finally decided to put pics up here!!! They are lovely!!! The Snow Boa was something I hadn't seen before. And that Pueblan is super neat, what a color mix. But I think my fav so far is the Burm. Wow. I want one of those... The full size ones are pretty big, but that dwarf is gorgeous and a good size...


Thank you ..... Here's another shot of the Snow Boa ...

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_AlexisFitzy_ (02-21-2016)

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## Zincubus

Just found a rather poor photo of one of my two Albino Royals .....

----------

_AlexisFitzy_ (02-21-2016)

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## Zincubus

My other obsessions ( still can't edit ) .....  All types of Music , football / soccer , Movies and TV , MotoGP and frequenting forums .

Did I mention I'm an Aspie ( Aspergers ) plus I'm obsessive  :Smile:

----------


## Boomerang

I too have seen some people here lose their mind over nothing -simple questions or simple opinions- and I can't help but wonder if they've ever had to communicate with another human outside of the internet.  It's always amazing to see a person who considers themselves an adult act like a 5 year old who had their candy taken away.  There are pathetic humans everywhere and they love frequenting online forums, apparently they love to let their inner idiot shine a lot.

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## Boomerang

> My other obsessions ( still can't edit ) ..... 
> 
> Did I mention I'm an Aspie ( Aspergers ) plus I'm obsessive



Yes, you have said so many times.......

----------


## MontyAndMelissa

> Hey ..  I'm getting the distinct feeling of "unwelcomeness" in this forum for some reason ... Something I've NEVER come across in all my years of frequenting forums . 
> 
> I've had a few 'biting' comments thrown my way since I ventured in here a few weeks ago and I really don't understand what the issue is .... I've admitted MANY times in here that I'm not an expert on anything but I have had many years of successful snake keeping .... I currently own 17 snakes of different types and in all my time I've never had a snake die on me . I had one with an RI many years ago and was lucky enough to be able  to cure it myself by nebulising F10 for a couple of weeks. 
> 
> Any advice I have suggested / posted has either been from my experiences or my friends .
> 
> Just think you need to cut the new guys a bit of slack .... I' m a real nice guy
> 
> Currently have .
> ...


Honestly,  people on this forum can be jerks, especially to newbies. Being a newbie is a good thing in my opinion,  I love seeing new people on the forum searching for answers and information.  Some of the more veteran owners think they know it all and know EXACTLY how a snake should be cared for, when there is actually a bit of leeway. What works best for you works best for you. There are some things that need to be avoided for your snakes safety,  but as far as everything else goes,  there is no ONE way to do anything.

----------


## couscous74

I just found this subforum and thread and ...

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## Zincubus

Well , we appear to be back to square one again .....

I've  had my knuckles rapped , so to speak and I will now endeavour to stay with the guidelines / rules of the forum in future .

I would reiterate that , at no time have I , nor will I ever intend to upset or antagonise any "innocent" party / parties our there .


However , it does feel that every little thing I post now is being scrutinised and quite often criticised ...
As I've said previously ...... I'm a real nice guy .

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## PitOnTheProwl

Why are you back to square one?
We all are here to express, learn and expand our knowledge.
Sometimes its not what you type but how you type it.  :Good Job:

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## Lizardlicks

Number of dudes I've had tell me they were "nice guys": I've lost count at this point.

Number of those dudes that turned out to be actually nice guys: exactly none of them.

I mean, that's probably not relevant, but still, lived experience.  Niceness is determined through actions, how you treat other people.  I can tell you right now whether you intend it to show up or not, the snide sort of condescending tone that pops up in most of your posts when there's a dispute in husbandry practices is what rubs people the wrong way.  Maybe try to watch for that and you're interactions will go smoother?

----------

_cristacake_ (02-21-2016),_Galaxygirl_ (02-21-2016),Megg (02-21-2016),Zincubus (02-21-2016)

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## Zincubus

> Number of dudes I've had tell me they were "nice guys": I've lost count at this point.
> 
> Number of those dudes that turned out to be actually nice guys: exactly none of them.
> 
> I mean, that's probably not relevant, but still, lived experience.  Niceness is determined through actions, how you treat other people.  I can tell you right now whether you intend it to show up or not, the snide sort of condescending tone that pops up in most of your posts when there's a dispute in husbandry practices is what rubs people the wrong way.  Maybe try to watch for that and you're interactions will go smoother?


The trouble is I just don't 'see' what you're clearly seeing ... similarly I apparently mispronounce some words , by putting the emphasis on the wrong part of the word or something like that - just to give an example of my difficulties   - its just part of Aspergers .

I've never , ever , been accused of being condescending in the real world so that's kinda strange to hear you suggest it . 


I certainly would never want to appear condescending that's for certain . 

As to the other point ..... I truly  am a nice guy  :Smile: 

You don't manage to work with autistic teenagers for 20 years by being anything other than being patient and caring  , understanding , dedicated to helping and genuinely nice .... anything other than the above and the kids themselves would sense it and see through any facade .

Thank you so much for trying to help out ..

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## distaff

The internet can be a harsh experience.

I left a political forum a few months ago over how another departing member was treated.  Decided I'd had enough of being around smug, nasty, narrow minded people.  This place is a welcome retreat compared to THAT place (...pit of vipers, metaphorically speaking  :Razz: )

Not everyone is going to get along.
Try not to let someone else's snark bother you.

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_cristacake_ (02-21-2016),Zincubus (02-21-2016)

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## JoshSloane

The Internet is rife with miscommunication. Sometimes it is helpful just to sit back and digest other people's posts, consider different view points and tone before firing back a reply. Communicating is hard enough in person, let alone on a forum.

Even Pitontheprowl and I manage to agree on things now and again. :Good Job:

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_cristacake_ (02-21-2016),PitOnTheProwl (02-21-2016),Zincubus (02-21-2016)

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## PitOnTheProwl

> Even Pitontheprowl and I manage to agree on things now and again.



 :Handshake:

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## Zincubus

> The Internet is rife with miscommunication. Sometimes it is helpful just to sit back and digest other people's posts, consider different view points and tone before firing back a reply. Communicating is hard enough in PERSON , let alone on a forum.
> 
> :


Ive just been reading through these last posts again and when I got to yours I read PERSON as PRISON  !!



See what I'm up against , fellas ?!?!?

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## DVirginiana

> Ive just been reading through these last posts again and when I got to yours I read PERSON as PRISON  !!
> 
> 
> 
> See what I'm up against , fellas ?!?!?


HA.  I guess it would make sense either way.  I mean, communicating with people in person is hard, but I imagine it would be doubly so in prison.

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Zincubus (02-22-2016)

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