Quote Originally Posted by Inknsteel View Post
I'm going to play a little devil's advocate here, because I have been divorced and successfully co-parenting my kids for 9 years now...

Does your ex husband smoke? And if not, do you really think that he doesn't know? You say that you KNOW he doesn't know, even though you have no communication with him. Are you just taking your daughter's word that he doesn't know? How can you be so sure about that? I guarantee that if he is not a smoker and is ever around your daughter, he knows. A non-smoker can smell a smoker from a block away. And if he IS a smoker, she's just following the example that's been set forth by her primary parent.

I don't know your situation or why you don't speak to your ex, but I can tell you that you will likely be met with resentment and hostility if you haven't had an active role in parenting this child and you try to step in and do it now. If you want to be an active parent and have any input into how she is being raised, you have to be able to put aside your personal differences and maintain an open line of communication. You don't have to be friends, but you have to be able to have a civil conversation wherein both parties hold the child's best interests above their own...
Well, it turns out you are correct. My ex does in fact know that our daughter is smoking and in fact he is ok with it. I was just going on what I THOUGHT I knew here. I know since I am not there I really ultimately have no say in what my child is allowed to do. However, I am a concerned mother and just want what is best for my daughter. I do not agree with letting her smoke and I let him know that, but since he is there and I am not, what can I do really? I just had to let him know my concerns and I also had to let my daughter know that I love her and care about her.