Slugs are slugs way before a female Ovys. The male or his sperm have nothing to do with slugs. There are numerous people(Jerry aka SnakesRKewl being the one I remember off the top of my head) that have stated they can actually palpate slugs along with viable follicles and there is a clear difference in how they feel.
As for what is really going on we don't have a clue. We are playing with the Phenotypes of these animals and have very little understand what is going on with the rest of the Genotype.
To the OP-
I commend you on getting your life together and making the changes that you want to make to improve it.
Also for coming on here and laying it all out there and apologizing.
Good luck in your journey and we look forward to seeing what comes.