Holiday trouble with my family :/ Snake related

[Kaorte]

Just thought you should know that cracked me up





I'm so sorry that your parents reacted the way they did. In my opinion is was waaaay out of line. However, people being individuals they are entitled to their opinions

I would play my best dead pan whenever it comes up (especially in a "HOW COULD YOU DO THIS!" manner). It doesn't sound like they're willing to listen to the reasonable side of it, and until the emotional reaction ebbs a bit it may be a futile effort. You seem to be taking it very well and maturely (good on you!!). You're not doing anything illegal, or unsafe, and at the very least they could respect you as an adult doing something you enjoy. They don't have to like it, but this reaction they had is negative to the point of bizarre to me

Lol glad you caught my joke


I'm sorry too. I really had wished to expose the truth once I had moved and was taking care of myself 100%. I figured once I was on my own two feet, they would respect my choices a little more.

In the meantime, I am going to let my mother be the one to approach me. I just don't feel comfortable talking to her about it unless she is willing to understand. I will gladly answer all of their questions to the best of my ability, but until they find some evidence that suggests I am doing something illegal or unsafe, I will not be changing my ways.

[aldebono]

I'm so glad to move. I currently live in a 500sqft apartment which works out just fine, but I can't really have guests for long periods, and all of my reptiles are in my living room. Its a little frustrating sometimes, but we make it work.

We must live in the same house! One bedroom, one bath and zero storage space. Is your "Laundry room" in a closet in your kitchen? Add two dogs and my young brother-in-law who stays 2 nights a week going to college classes. It's a little crowded.

My mom gripes about feeding the rats off too. I just remind her about the cute baby cows and little fluffy chicks that she eats. It's no different to raising your own livestock for slaughter. I started raising rats to know they have had a great life where they were healthy and loved before serving their purpose.

[Kaorte]

We must live in the same house! One bedroom, one bath and zero storage space. Is your "Laundry room" in a closet in your kitchen? Add two dogs and my young brother-in-law who stays 2 nights a week going to college classes. It's a little crowded.

My mom gripes about feeding the rats off too. I just remind her about the cute baby cows and little fluffy chicks that she eats. It's no different to raising your own livestock for slaughter. I started raising rats to know they have had a great life where they were healthy and loved before serving their purpose.

Sounds similar! But yours sounds much more complete. We have the bare minimum. Only appliances are the fridge an the oven/stove. No washer dryer, no dishwasher. I only have two closets. One is very large in the front of my house and has my bikes, supplies, sewing machine, rat food, cleaning stuff, incubator, cat litter, basically everything. The other closet I have is tiny and has my clothes. its crowded. its small. But I love it. I will miss my place when I move, but dang I can't wait for 3 bedrooms and 1500 square feet! My dog and cat will thank me later

[sorraia]

I'm sorry you have to deal with this, and wish I could offer some advice that would help. I have gotten criticism for my choice in pets. I grew up having a lot of pets, always have, and have received criticism from my family, though not quite as bad as what you experienced. Like you, I mostly just avoid the topic with certain people I know would react badly. I’m just waiting for some of those family members to find out about the snakes I have now… They may not react badly (my in-laws were surprisingly cool with it and even wanted to see the snakes! I was nervous about them, because my MIL tends to be more like you described your mother: manicures, pedicures, hair just so, appearances are important, etc), but past experience has me weary. My parents have at least been accepting, even if they don’t like it. My dad’s response is, “Well if it makes you happy” and my mom’s response is “Yuck! Just keep them away from my granddaughter.” Not the greatest response, but at least not condescending either. Hopefully in time your mother will come around and at least accept your interests, even if she doesn't like it or understand.

[barbie.dragon]

That is not motherly worrying. If she wants to cut you off from money that's just her over reacting. If she was worried for your safety she wouldn't threaten to cut you off like that. WHen I got my first snake my mom was of course very worried and would double check to see if I washed my hands ect. But she didn't try to kick me out of the house or take away my cell phone and so forth. And cutting your health care? How is that worrying for your health? To be honest with you, don't talk to your mom, talk to your dad. She's obviously very emotional and being irrational (not a bad thing, just a side effect of super emotional behavior) and convincing her is an impossible task. Just talk to your father and ignore her. And why is she mad that you didn't tell her about the snakes? If she ever brings it up tell her that she wouldn't support you anyways and that you are afraid of telling her anything. Show proof that you did not spend "her" money on your reptiles. Receipts and everything. After her anger dies out the facts will be the only thing standing and she won't have much to say

[Zombie]

As far as business goes I am unsure of your local laws. But I do know here that if you make any profit 3 out of 5 years doing your hobby, you will be considered a business and held to that standard. If you are not profitable in that same time frame, you can remain hobby status.

You are supposed to report the sales on your taxes. It is taxable income. That's why I got my business license and went right for it. We get to write off all our herp expenses too. As a hobby you can write things off as well (keep your receipts), but it would just bring you to a total of 0 if you spent more than you earned. As a business, money I have spent more than what I have earned becomes a part of my return. Just food for thought

[Kaorte]

That is not motherly worrying. If she wants to cut you off from money that's just her over reacting. If she was worried for your safety she wouldn't threaten to cut you off like that. WHen I got my first snake my mom was of course very worried and would double check to see if I washed my hands ect. But she didn't try to kick me out of the house or take away my cell phone and so forth. And cutting your health care? How is that worrying for your health? To be honest with you, don't talk to your mom, talk to your dad. She's obviously very emotional and being irrational (not a bad thing, just a side effect of super emotional behavior) and convincing her is an impossible task. Just talk to your father and ignore her. And why is she mad that you didn't tell her about the snakes? If she ever brings it up tell her that she wouldn't support you anyways and that you are afraid of telling her anything. Show proof that you did not spend "her" money on your reptiles. Receipts and everything. After her anger dies out the facts will be the only thing standing and she won't have much to say

Agreed. I don't think she really intends to cut me off like that and I think my dad will be able to convince her otherwise since after all, he is the one making the money, not her.


I wish I could show her with receipts that I didn't use her money, but I don't keep all my receipts and the bank account received direct deposits from my parents and my job. The money they gave me was always budgeted and it always went to bills/school. I never had any leftover to spend on animals. It just wasn't possible.

[Kaorte]

As far as business goes I am unsure of your local laws. But I do know here that if you make any profit 3 out of 5 years doing your hobby, you will be considered a business and held to that standard. If you are not profitable in that same time frame, you can remain hobby status.

You are supposed to report the sales on your taxes. It is taxable income. That's why I got my business license and went right for it. We get to write off all our herp expenses too. As a hobby you can write things off as well (keep your receipts), but it would just bring you to a total of 0 if you spent more than you earned. As a business, money I have spent more than what I have earned becomes a part of my return. Just food for thought

I am in Chicago. I have been doing a bit of research on getting an LBL or a home business license. I think I will have to talk to a city of Chicago representative before I make any final decisions.

What constitutes "profit"? Does this just mean animals you have sold, or does it factor in maintenance costs, new animals you've purchases, and food for those animals? Cause in that case, I won't be making profit for a while

I didn't know I could write those expenses off on my taxes. Even as a hobby? I don't know if that makes total sense to me, but I can see where that would be beneficial.

I am very interested in becoming a small business in the future. I don't think I will be making any profit in the next 2 years, but once my smaller females are breeding age, they could potentially throw me a profit. I don't think my parents understand the business potential with these animals. I'm not in it for the money, but its in the back of my mind and I am conscious of it.

[Zombie]

Yes, the expenses of feeding them, snake purchases, etc that you buy for the hobby would be write offs. Check with your tax professionals (even h&r block) and ask them. Sales of snakes and what not would be considered taxable income. If you have to report that income on your taxes then you should be able to report the costs to make those profits, make sense? Which would constitute wether you make a profit or not. If your expenses exceed your sales, then your non profitable. If you are doing it as a hobby that's where your expenses stop, bring you to 0. If you are a business, then the expenses beyond that go into the negative and become a part of your tax return hope this makes sense...

[Kaorte]

Yes, the expenses of feeding them, snake purchases, etc that you buy for the hobby would be write offs. Check with your tax professionals (even h&r block) and ask them. Sales of snakes and what not would be considered taxable income. If you have to report that income on your taxes then you should be able to report the costs to make those profits, make sense? Which would constitute wether you make a profit or not. If your expenses exceed your sales, then your non profitable. If you are doing it as a hobby that's where your expenses stop, bring you to 0. If you are a business, then the expenses beyond that go into the negative and become a part of your tax return hope this makes sense...

Ah I see where you are going. I can see where that would be beneficial. My cousin does my taxes for me, so I will ask her about it