My very first love CRUSHED me when he broke up with me. I was a walking zombie, I lost tons of weight because I couldn't eat. I took sleeping pills when I didn't have to work, so that I could just sleep away my days. I found no joy in ANYTHING.

Then one day, a very wise person told me "depression cannot hit a moving target". In other words - MAKE yourself get out and do things, stay busy, even when you don't want to. For me, it was volunteering in my community. I'd wake up days and NOT want to go and fulfill my obligation of volunteering, but I kept at it. I volunteered my BUTT off - and you know what? During that time, I learned to love myself. I came out of that funk, and I grew from that experience. I learned that the next time a relationship didn't work out, I'd be fine. Because I really do like the person that I am, and I LOVE giving my time to others who are less fortunate than myself. While I received compliments for giving my time, there really was a selfish motive behind it - I did it, because it made me feel like I had worth. And I knew that I was making a difference in people's lives.

In Atlanta we have a volunteer organization called Hands On Atlanta, which has volunteer opportunities all over the city. From mentoring a child, to helping drive loved ones to see their incarcerated loved ones (often HOURS away) through a church sponsored program, to cleaning up someone's yard. I also became a "buddy" to a person with HIV/AIDS. After he lost his battle with AIDS, it was very hard to get another buddy, but I did. And lost her as well. But I know that my non-judgemental friendship made a difference in their lives.

These days I volunteer with Canine Assistants that trains service dogs for the physically disabled. In fact, I have a dog laying at my feet right now that will go to work with me tomorrow to get work place experience before he's placed.

I'm very sorry that you're dealing with these struggles in your life right now - but I think if you practice "depression can't hit a moving target", you'll start to feel better.