This is a family friendly forum, so perhaps in the future, keep these types of comments rated G.
Sorry to hear about the poor rat. I really don't like to feed live either, but my snakes are my pets and must be fed what they will take, and a majority will take FT or live, but a few just wont.
It does sound like this was just a fluke accident, but I would have been just as torn up about it too. I hate to see an animal suffer.
My advice is to gas the animal before you attempt to feed her. Prekill is just about the next best thing to feeding live. I strongly believe that time and patience will help switch her to eating prekilled rats and in time perhaps FT.