My fiance's father passed away last night

[Albert Clark]

My future father-in-law died last night. He died in the rehab wing of a nursing home. They found him unresponsive in his room and called 911. They gave him CPR all the way from the rehab center to the emergency room of the hospital and they continued to give CPR once he arrived at the ER of the hospital. No one knows how long he went without breathing. He had many serious health problems and fell twice here at home and fractured some bones. I feel like this all my fault because I had two nervous breakdowns while taking care of him, I couldn't cope. My anxiety and bipolar always cause me to fail. I tried my best and it just wasn't good enough. I have a very strong feeling of guilt over all of this. My fiancé has no family left, he was adopted by his father and mother. He has no siblings but I am going to be strong for him because he has been here for me through some of my worst days. Together, my fiancé and I will get through this and move on in life. We are looking to get our own house as soon we can. I am taking medical transcription classes online because I want to do this from home as a job. I guess life just has to go on.

My deepest sympathy goes out to you and your fiance' over the loss. It's always painful to lose a loved one and never gets easy to deal with. However you have to know that all of your emotions at this point are normal and part of the grieving process. Although you may feel like it's all your fault it most certainly is not! We have no control over fate. It is a part of life and death. You said you tried your best... and that's all we have is our best to offer. We do our best bc that is the most that we can do. The rest is out of our hands and that's the way you have to look at it. Grieving is a process and takes us through a gamut of emotions all of which is normal and takes time. Stay strong for you first and everything else will follow. Stay in peace and not pieces too.