All Women Should Read This

[I-KandyReptiles]

This happened 6 years ago, when I had just turned 14. I was shocked when I called, and had my mom call as well and they told her the same thing.

Her boyfriend at the time called him later pretending to be the police and told him there was a warrant out for his arrest and to bring himself in. I'm no sure if he did or not, but I hope he did.

He was a family friend.

[wilomn]

If it bugs you, go talk to a detective at least. There may not be a statute of limitations since you were underage, or it may not have expired. From what I've seen, most of the time these guys are not one time offenders.

It's also totally cool if you just want to let it go, it's no easy thing to deal with, as if you didn't already know that.

[iCandiBallPythons]

Alot of women think cc is the best resort for situations like this but guns jam, knowing how to defend yourself and immobilize an assaillant hand to hand is fail safe

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[TheSnakeGeek]

Alot of women think cc is the best resort for situations like this but guns jam, knowing how to defend yourself and immobilize an assaillant hand to hand is fail safe

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even if the gun does fail, having a heavy chunk of steel to bash someones face in with would be a little better than just your hands.

[youbeyouibei]

Alot of women think cc is the best resort for situations like this but guns jam, knowing how to defend yourself and immobilize an assaillant hand to hand is fail safe

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Using your brain is a failsafe, not empty hand tactics or weapons or any other tool in and of itself. I'm not a small guy and am in fair physical shape. I also carry guns, plural, for a living working in law enforcement. I'm also versed in various disciplines of martial arts as well as the use and application of various types of weapons, both small arms and long guns along with a variety of other weapons such as a Taser and various other force options. That said, I don't tempt fate by going into places I shouldn't when I'm off duty nor do I have a need to prove anything by being an idiot and inviting trouble when there is no need to. Being aware of your surroundings and trusting your instincts/6th sense/whatever you want to call it will serve you better than any type of martial arts or weapon ever will. That said, defense in depth: multiple tools at your disposal, should you need them; OC spray/pepper spray, Taser, kubaton, gun, knife/edged weapons, etc. As far as hand to hand combat goes, you're going to lose 70%+ of your endurance in the first minute of a fight, unless your conditioning is on par with an Olympic athlete.

My goal is to end the encounter as quickly and decisively as possible if I'm unable to avoid it or get away from the threat. I want to break that person's intent and train of thought, send them into the OODA loop: Observe, Orient, Decide and Act while I'm already at the ACT! stage of things, whether that be to run like hell, discharge as many rounds as it takes to stop their aggressive action or to engage them in empty hand techniques as a last resort if all else fails. Again, I have no desire to prove anything in a fight with someone and will absolutely opt to avoid the encounter altogether if possible and when possible, provided no one else is in mortal danger. As a cop when I'm working, that's a slightly different ball game but again, I don't rush into things to prove a point or otherwise try to show off/be a hero. I wait for my backup and while I might seek out the criminal element, I try to do it intelligently and again, trust my gut. Off duty, unless my life or someone else's is in mortal danger, I'll be an awesome witness and testify against the dirt bag(s) at trial later on rather than try to be a hero. My goal is to live, whatever the circumstances. For a woman, if that means complying with the rapist, do what it takes to live through the encounter so you can send the sob up after you testify. No one can or should ever judge someone in that situation for doing what they have to in order to live through the encounter. Sometimes fighting back will get you killed while going along will at least allow you to live and far be it from me to judge anyone who did what they had to in order to survive. Just my two cents. A great book for anyone, male or female, is by Gavin de Becker, "The Gift of Fear"; it talks about the importance of trusting your instincts and realizing that there are predators in the world, four-legged and otherwise.

To the OP: Thanks for posting this; there is a lot of great information in there and it never hurts to reiterate it, regardless of how often it's been shared. Thanks for sharing this!

[iCandiBallPythons]

You can also drop a big chunk of steel rendering it useless and can even be turned against victim.

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[BrandiR]

He was a family friend.

No he wasn't.

[I-KandyReptiles]

No he wasn't.

Obviously not. But before this we had trusted him.

[OctagonGecko729]

Alot of women think cc is the best resort for situations like this but guns jam, knowing how to defend yourself and immobilize an assaillant hand to hand is fail safe

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Pull up a video on youtube of a 1000-5000 round glock torture test and take note of how many times it jams. Then take note that most self defense cases end in under 10 rounds fired. Not to mention that your probably better off carrying around a toy gun then nothing, just introducing a handgun into the situation will occassionally make people run. Knowing how to defend yourself and immobolize an assaillant hand to hand is absolutely not fail safe.

All of these self defense hand to hand techniques while good are not full proof, nothing is.

In the end you could be a master gunslinger and BJJ master and still end up getting raped or killed. Sometimes things just come down to luck of the draw. I would advocate women to carry a handgun, pepper spray, a knife, and take MMA/self defense classes, and learn about attacker's psychology but in the end none of those things 100% insure that you will be unharmed when you get into an engagement with a attacker.

[OctagonGecko729]

Obviously not. But before this we had trusted him.

First off, I am really sorry that this happened to you, no one should ever have to go through that and I really do not even want to imagine how this must have effected you. I know you've probably heard it a hundred times but I mean it.

It is also depressingly common that victims of sexual assault know their attacker personally. An upwards of 80% of sexual assault victims were raped/molested by a family member or friend.