Any childfree by choice?

[Jazi]

I also hate it when people say "You're young, you'll change your mind", people don't know what goes on in my mind, and need to stop acting like they do. I had this view when I was 13. I had it when I was 17. I had it when I was 21, and I still have it today. It's not going away.

x2 That's a really annoying point of view. I grew up hearing stories of abuse, I've known I wanted to adopt abused kids since I was a very very young child. Before I even hit the double digits. This has not changed in more than 10 years. Am I still growing, is my brain still going to change and mature over the years? Yes. But I'm confident in saying that I do not and will not want kids.

[heathers*bps]

I, honestly, could not even begin to imagine life without my daughter. But I highly respect all of you for sticking with your decisions regardless of how other people thought and/or said. I get a lot of questions when people find out I have one child and got myself fixed, lol. Really, who's business is it anyway?
I wish you all the best of luck in whatever you choose. I still think about adopting or atleast fostering, as I adore children ( well some ) and I find it very noble of people willing to open their homes and their hearts to other peoples children

[Xotik]

I'm 24, and until recently, I didn't really want kids. Now I kinda do, but my living situation demands that I keep a tight control of my reproductive organs so that they do not perform their intended purpose. Unfortunately I am also a very high risk pregnancy candidate. Along the same lines as other members, I have genetic issues, and a few previous injuries that would be severely exacerbated by carrying a full term pregnancy.

I've been entertaining the idea of adopting, but because I would rather get married to someone first, I've pushed it to the back burner of my brain.

And I agree with Raptor - most babies are ugly

[GoingPostal]

I'm 26, no kids, don't want any. I don't want to babysit, hold your kid, or be around babies, they just don't do it for me at all. My b/f doesn't want kids either and we have been together for 8 years so my family has almost given up, my sister sold all her baby crap but my brother reproduced again and has 2 year old twins so they are always trying to get me to hold a baby or be around them like it will rub off. I've always said I don't want kids and always got told I'd change my mind. Pets are enough work and expense, I watch my sisters' kids at least once a month and thankfully they are grown enough to be cool (5 and 8) but it's still a long couple hours and I'm glad to get away lol.

[Royal Hijinx]

I am 36 and have no kids. When I was married, we were unable to due to health reasons, but we were also busy professionals and did not want them.

The other issue I have personally, is I really cannot relate to the way when someone has a kid it becomes EVERYTHING and they seem to lose their own personality and identity.

This makes it hard dating at my age, since a lot of girls have kids. I have no problem, and I have met some cool kids, but what I find is that the girls put up this front that the kid is first and foremost, and that comes across as VERY difficult to make me part of their life. I am not a fan of being told upfront that I am second fiddle. I can handle when the kids and the relationship are of equal importance.

[bubblz]

I grew up in the system and helped raise other peoples kids most of my life, both fosters and relatives. As far as I'm concerned I did my time and then some. For anyone who wants to adopt, especially older kids to teenagers foster first. When things work out you can always adopt the child you foster. But once those papers are signed there's no going back.

My sister recently adopted a family of 3 siblings (currently 10,12 & 16) it was suppose to be four, that she's had for over 3yrs. She was having issues with one of the teenagers and she went to another foster before hand. But the other teenager didn't really speak up during the process, just went with the flow. For what ever reason changed her mind afterwards and REALLY started showing her *ss. To a point where she's been living with me for the past couple of months because she can't go back to their house.

It's a situation that could happen regardless (foster/adopted/blood) but in most cases adoptions work out better when you foster first.

[PitOnTheProwl]

I didnt read through everything posted here BUT
I wouldnt give our son up for anything. We are 36 and he is 17 so we are also almost free LOL
Would I do it again if it could be done over? NO!
I couldnt get on the table fast enough when I found out our health insurance covered my vasectomy for free!!
My wife and I just think there are two major problems on this planet:
1 over populated, the human race is a deadly cancer and doesnt know when to stop destroying everything we touch.
2 over breeding, I understand that my great grandparents had a huge family but that was because they had a farm. Why does anyone have more than one child now anyway? Just because you can?

I personally dont want to be alive in another 50 or so years just because I dont want to see the mess our planet will be in and I feel guilty that our kids are going to have to live in it.

[Redneck_Crow]

I don't plan to ever have kids. I can't stand them, to be honest. Due to where I live, I've gotten a lot of flack for it. One woman out right threatened to punch me when I said that I find babies to be ugly. Another guy couldn't understand why I "[didn't] want to spread [my] genetics".

I also hate it when people say "You're young, you'll change your mind", people don't know what goes on in my mind, and need to stop acting like they do. I had this view when I was 13. I had it when I was 17. I had it when I was 21, and I still have it today. It's not going away.

When I was 12 I told my parents that I never wanted kids. Same thing in my twenties and thirties. I'm 56 now, and no kids. No regrets either.

We don't all want the same thing. Some folks are too dense to comprehend it.

[AK907]

Wow, just when I felt like the only person to not want kids. I agree, it gets very old having people constantly hounding me about not wanting children.

I don't like kids, never have, probably never will, especially kids nowadays since you are no longer allowed to discipline them. They are absolutely out of control! I could rant all day about this subject, but I will leave it at this: I wasn't too good to get my butt beat (even in public) as a kid. I deserved 99.9% of them and I deserved a lot more than I actually got and I turned out just fine. Bruises are abuse, a smack on the the hind end to get their attention followed by a stiff, "No!" isn't.

My wife, however, wants kids someday. Someday we may have kids, but it will not be anytime soon, we have both agreed to that. It will be when we are both older (I'm 27, she is 20) and we are more financially stable. We refuse to be a welfare whores like so many low life, drug addicted breeders out there that can't keep their legs closed and have 7 kids, all of which WE pay for with OUR paycheck. If we do it we are going to do it right!

[roseyoungblood]

Wow, there were far more responses than I imagined! All of you who posted hit the nail on the head. I have had a few friends here and there who have kids, and I've made clear my no babysitting rule. They've mostly understood, but usually by the time the kid is 3 we've parted ways, due to schedule conflicts, lack of things in common, etc. One friend I quit talking to because I felt she was borderline (verbally) abusive toward her kid, and I couldn't criticize, because "you (I) don't have kids, you (I) just don't understand." She once told me, after screaming at her toddler--this happened all the time--to never have kids. She looked so miserable. A year later, she was pregnant again. I had been through a legit pregnancy scare around this time and was considering keeping it if it came to be, but my experience with her led me to follow her advice. I really couldn't just stand by and watch, but she wasn't exactly something to go running to SRS about, either.

I also can't imagine coming home from my job only to have to spend the rest of the night cooking, cleaning, and getting a toddler/child to bed. Neither can I imagine staying home, cooking, cleaning and talking to no one but a child all day long. Some people can do it, and do it well, I'll leave it to them