I understand that it's hard to stop following the methods that you're used to. Clearly, it has been working for you. However, the members here are highly experienced and have provided a lot of good advice that will benefit your snakes. In the end it's your choice to take it or leave it. They are your snakes after all. But I guarantee that the advice given here has prevented the injury and/or death of many other snakes.
Anyway, back to your girl. I've personally handled the snake before. She's really sweet. I've plucked her out of her old tank no problem and never experienced 'cage aggression' from her in the past. Like I originally stated, she's most likely stressed and needs time to settle down. I know it's hard not to handle her, but can you try leaving her alone for a week and see what happens then?
And I don't know if you have already answered or addressed this, but what size tank is she in? Perhaps it's too big for her? I know you said she has 2 hides and lots of greenery, but is it possible that she still feels too 'open'? Tighter spaces may help her settle and become less aggressive. You can put rolled up wads of paper towel or news paper into her tank. Even covering her cage w/ a sheet may help. And is she housed separately from your male?
I wish you luck.
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