How do you guys do it.

[shescountry89]

You're a good person and you have a lot of support from the good people on this forum! You may feel like you're dealing with this alone, but trust me you're not. We are all here for you!

You have to remind yourself that the pain you may be feeling, no matter how bad, is only matched by the beauty that still exists all around you! It may not seem like it now, but it's moments like these that will make you stronger in the long run! The troubling times that test one's heart and soul will end up doubling the strength of your resolve, courage, and compassion! You'll get through this and you'll come out on the other side stronger then ever!

Try to focus on the things that make you happy. Try to discover new things that will bring you happiness. You're much stronger then you realize and you can take this pain and turn it into positive forces.

It's hard for others to see into our individual "mental prisons". Your roommate most likely cares for you but just doesn't understand how deep these holes we can fall into get... You say you don't have anyone but just look at the positive responses you've received just in the last hour! You've been there for us in the past and now we are all here for you now! We may not be sitting there right next to you but we all offer our virtual shoulders you can cry on anytime you need to! .. As for the insomnia - I know all about that! Olstyn has it right - try to exercise before going to bed. It can be extremely hard to fall asleep when you have a lot on your mind. The best thing you can do is to try and sleep ONLY when you are really exhausted. Exercise is also a great way to release some pent up negative energy!

Just keep pushing forward. It will be worth it in the end. I promise.

I am trying to focus, more than ever. I am glad to have everyone on here, I feel stupid for venting my problems online but... i really have no other choice. I know everyone has problems, but there are sometimes in my life, like right now where my faith in everything is broken. As for sleep, it will probably be coming soon. At least I hope so.

I am going back to my apartment, don't have internet there yet.

[wilomn]

Time for tough love Chica.

You are enabling your mother to be greedy and self-centered by continuing to go to her with your problems only to have her dump hers on you. It's not about fault or blame or any of that crap, some people just aren't good at being parents. The reasons, for now, don't matter. You got short changed. Get over it.

You're young, fairly good looking and have a decent brain. You also know how to work people. Don't deny it, your bar posts make it evident. You're not the first and are far from the last, but if you can't be honest with yourself, you will be miserable.

Since you do have a working brain, what you need is some guidance. Do you have grandparents that you're on good terms with? Any family at all that would lend you a shoulder? I have no doubt that you will be fine in a fairly short time. You're going through a lot of stuff right now and some of it probably for the first time. We learn by doing, by the mistakes we make and the successes we achieve. Right now you're doing a lot for the first time. It will be uncomfortable and hard and make you want to give up. Welcome to The World.

There are people here who will offer advice, heh, and some like me who will want to be helpful but know that the only way for you to really get through this and be better for it, is to just do it. Do it the best you can, learn from your mistakes and build on your successes. You're only 21. It's OK to not know all the answers and feel just the way you do. It's OK to complain about it, a bit, and ask for help and just vent.

Then, when you're done with that, move on. Make a list of what you want to do in the next 30, 60, 90 days and do that. Don't rely on your mother for anything. If you don't put her in a position where she can let you down, you won't feel so bad. If your dad can help, great. Maybe show him this thread and let him see what you're really going through. He may not know. Sometimes us guys, while we mean well and try hard, just don't see what you women do, what you need. It's OK to spell it out for him, us. Occasionally.

Try keeping a journal or just writing things down and working them out. Remember though, if you put it online it never goes away. If it's on your computer, someone can find it. If you put things down you want no one to ever know, and it's OK to do that, use paper. Then destroy it when you're done. Writing your problems and then burning the paper, safely, can also help let go of anxiety and fear.

I think you'll be OK. Don't give up, don't give in.

[WingedWolfPsion]

Why? Because if you give up, 'they win'.
Go ahead and get angry. You didn't deserve all of that, after all.

Get something to eat, and start taking care of yourself. If you have to fight to make it, so be it--fight!

[Nate]

What ties you down to the area you're currently in? Family? School?

[BallsUnlimited]

I have a secret.
I am one of those people, that no matter the smile on my face & how happy I am.

I am completely broken inside

I should be happy, I just moved out & into my own apartment.
I am finally away from everything, on my own.
I am getting a restraining order on my ex.
I haven't slept more than 3 hours in 2 days, i'm having nightmares.
My family is falling apart.
& I feel like I don't have anyone to talk to.
My roomate doesn't understand, because she has a amazing family.
People who support her, a mother who doesn't say
"Get over it" When you come to her balling, and in pain and doesn't want to talk to you because she is to busy moving far away from you with her new boyfriend.

I am losing my composure, I am so tired that I am not cooherant.
I feel like my animals are all I have, and I don't know how much more I can take.

My ex has threatened my life, and has made me paranoid so I don't want to go anywhere.

I am 21 years old, and just want to give up everything. I don't have anyone.
Someone please tell me why I should even try anymore.

516 322 1563 gimme a call if you need to talk. Ive been to hell and back and trust me i know how you feel.

[Elise.m]

When I went through the dark time of my life, I completely shut down. I've always had the ability to just shut down within a week, and not care about anything. Trust me, you do not want to do this. Because when you come out of it, everything hits you like a ton of bricks and all the emotions come back even more powerful than they were.

Since you need someone to talk to, have you tried therapy? I know everyone is squeamish at the word therapist, but they can help. My BF was like my therapist, I don't know how he pulled it off but he did. Without being able to talk to someone, it will eat you alive, and you'll dwell on these things for days on end.

If you need someone to talk to, I come from a shattered home. I'm not a pro, but I have shoulders that are dry

[Morph Momma]

I have tons of drama in my life...losing a contempt of court hearing and having to pay my baby daddy thousands of dollars and knowing I don't get to see my daughter for months on end, come home to have my TV and phone cut off cause I can't pay the bills because my school screwed up all of my paper work and has shorted me over a thousand dollars over several months...and am blocked from enrolling in the new semester so I don't know whether I will get paid for the month of June and my financial aid also got blocked so no money there either....don't know how bills will get paid for July....

And that was just the last 2-3 months...imagine that kind of crap for years on end....that is my life....been in a horrible custody battle for over 5 years now...

All these were out of my control....if you can control it that is one thing...if not that is a totally different thing....You absolutely cannot control most of those things so why waste your time....

The most important thing to remember is: Someone always has it worse than you!!!

I don't know whether you are religious or not but here is a great line:

If he brings you to it....he will bring you through it....

[MikeV]

Let me tell you my story, so you KNOW I can relate

I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Reynauds syndrome 3 years ago.

I am in constant pain. I use to skateboard.. bike ride, hang out with friends

Now I hate my life

I am alone, I have no friends, I am a jerk, And all of this has made me a harder person.

I bottle everything up. Nobody understands my situation. they think I am making up my illness. I seriously just cry sometimes because of the lack of understanding in my family.... and If I said I wasnt a LITTLE depressed, Id by lying to you.

I hate my life.. and I cant stand the people around me

I have often thought about suicide and what it would be like if things were differen't

I also have severe insomnia. I sleep 3 hours a night.

Now, what has kept me going

Little things.. like my cat. I have a 9 year old cat that ive had for a LONG time. I love her more than I love my brother. im not joking


I have my computer.. I love my computer. I love gaming.

I have had all the physical activity stripped away from me in my life so Ive had to find other ways to stay as happy as possible.


And although I am a little depressed about my situation, it would be 100% worse, I would probably have killed myself already, if it wasnt for these little things I love

Think about all the little things you enjoy most in life, and also think of your family

thats how you pull through stuff like this


Good luck!, you'll get better!!!

[Repsrul]

Let me tell you my story, so you KNOW I can relate

I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Reynauds syndrome 3 years ago.

I am in constant pain.

Now I hate my life

I am alone, I have no friends, I am a jerk, And all of this has made me a harder person.

I bottle everything up. Nobody understands my situation. they think I am making up my illness. I seriously just cry sometimes because of the lack of understanding in my family.... and If I said I wasnt a LITTLE depressed, Id by lying to you.

I hate my life.. and I cant stand the people around me

I have often thought about suicide and what it would be like if things were differen't

I also have severe insomnia. I sleep 3 hours a night.

I know what you are going through. I too have constant pain(I have an appointment with a rumatolagist next week my doctor thinks I may have fibromyalgia), daily headaches, server migraines(I take daily medication to try to cut these down and I need to inject my self when I do get one), depression(I have been diagnosted), anxiety(I have been diagnosted), very bad insomnia(I have been on so many perscribed meds that did not help) and a few years ago I thought about ending it all.

Not much makes me happy. Most people annoy me even if they have not done anything. I try to be nice to everyone but it is hard because of the way I feel everyday. After all it is not anyone elses fault.

What keeps me going is my animals. I have two cats, three dogs and all of my snakes. When ever I have had a bad day(which is pretty much everyday) they always cheer me up.

[4theSNAKElady]

Laura, if you need to talk to someone, please call me. I would be happy to listen and help you in any way I can.