I too am very very sorry for you loss. I have echo the sentiments of others though. Sometimes in life, we get dealt a hand of cards that just absolutely sends up into survival mode. On forums like this we also frequently get young children who post things like that and I honestly figured that's exactly what your post was.
If your at a point now where you can do the right thing by the animals that's great. In the future though, when you hit the wall and you can see that you are not able to do the right thing by your animals, for whatever reason, it's time to find them a good home.
Do you have pics?