Get a big fat life insurance policy on the wife! LOL JUST JOKING!!!
I can relate with your wife about the retic, although I am a fan of the giant snakes. I have several boas and they can crap a pile if you know what I mean. I couldn't imagine cleaning up after a 20 foot retic craps! I guess you use a shovel!!! Retics also can be expensive to feed and house. I also would imagine they are hard to handle when the get 12 ft or longer.
Take your time! Maybe look into the dwarf or super dwarf retics.