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BPnet Veteran
Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
 Originally Posted by Seru1
Instead of thinking about the bad ones think about all the good friends in life you've picked. And all the great family you didn't but got anyway. It's easy in times like these to get abit down and its healthy to. But don't ever forget you have alot of people that care about you!
And some of those people are right here just a click away and ready to talk. Can't do much else but we can talk. ^_^
I've been trying, trust me I have. Always try to stay optimistic but sometimes it just doesn't work. Pretty sad when most people you have things in common with are online and live across the country.
I do appreciate all the advice though, and it will definatly be taken.
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BPnet Veteran
Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
 Originally Posted by bsash
Exactly, we could always talk. God knows I am on here enough, ha ha.
Yeah, I am too when I am not working at night.
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Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
Don't make the mistake of thinking your feet are nailed to the soil where you currently live.
I imported my husband from Sweden. It's completely 100% possible to form a relationship online, realize that you can go wherever you WANT, and move to be with that person (or they move to be with you). Do not write off that possibility. Sometimes the local pool just isn't deep enough.
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The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to WingedWolfPsion For This Useful Post:
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Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
My husband's comment is, "Who is this guy she's dating, and what rock did he crawl out from under? He should go back there. I'm sure there's a perfectly good rock with a nice slimy underside that misses him very much."
My comment? Is that armchair psychologists are adorable, but they make [very bad] boyfriends. Sure, if you're still attracted and the rest of the relationship is swell, I wouldn't dump him just for an idiotic comment like that. But he has hobbies, too, right? Sooner or later he's either going to have to get a grip and wrap his brain around the idea that this is YOUR hobby, and these are YOUR pets, and it makes you HAPPY to have them... or, well, not.
Frankly, the armchair psychology is just a way of attempting to exert control over you. Either (a) he's got a problem with the snakes, or (b) he's the controlling type. Hopefully it's (a) and he'll get over it. But (b) is not cool. Because trying to convince you that stuff that makes you happy is actually pathological? Is the very definition of pathological.
(And hey, good luck. I know the feeling you're talking about, and it sucks rocks.)
Last edited by JLC; 05-04-2010 at 07:40 AM.
Reason: language
-Jackie Monk
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Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
 Originally Posted by WingedWolfPsion
Don't make the mistake of thinking your feet are nailed to the soil where you currently live.
I imported my husband from Sweden. It's completely 100% possible to form a relationship online, realize that you can go wherever you WANT, and move to be with that person (or they move to be with you). Do not write off that possibility. Sometimes the local pool just isn't deep enough. 
I like how you were pretty successful with that, most people think the worst of internet dating. I personally don't mind if people do that but at my age that's something I wouldn't try LOL. But I admire how you made your possibilities of finding someone more likely from doing that, pretty smart
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Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
 Originally Posted by wolfy-hound
Dump him now. He's a controller. He doesn't want you to have the animals because they take you attention away from him. He wants you to move in with him so you will be in "his space", and therefor more under his thumb. He's already dictacting to you what you will and will not have and do. He already doesn't make you happy, he doesn't want you to do what you like to do, so why are you even bothering to ask other people?
Why should you be the "happiest girl alive"? Just becuase he said he wants you to move in with him? You don't need him. You are your own person, with your own goals and life, and just wanting to be with someone just because they are willing to say yes is no reason at all.
Dump him. He's treating you like garbage already, he's just doing it with a smile on his face.
Read this whole thread. You all had good adivse but wolfy hit every point. X1000
By far best advise here
And as far as my comment on this. Hes asking you to choose between snakes or him correct?
He should "love" you for who YOU are and WHAT you do. Not what he wants. Next he's gonna tell you to quit your job  
 Originally Posted by WingedWolfPsion
I imported my husband from Sweden.
Sorry but that made me laugh. When you said "imported" i thouhgt you ment bought one 
Had to keep reading Nothing wrong with online (I would not do it personally but do not look down upon it)
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Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
 Originally Posted by CoolioTiffany
I like how you were pretty successful with that, most people think the worst of internet dating. I personally don't mind if people do that but at my age that's something I wouldn't try LOL. But I admire how you made your possibilities of finding someone more likely from doing that, pretty smart 
Well, I am 37, not sure what your age is, lol.
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BPnet Veteran
Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
Excellent advice above. However, here's one more aspect. I can't speak from firsthand experience, but I've a friend who started off the same way, and six months later we started seeing the bruises. Controlling like this is often the first step towards abuse. I'm not saying he is an abuser, but don't get sucked in. You have years to find the right guy, and you will find one who is all this guy is and more, who will not only deal with your passions but take them as his own.
1.0 normal ball python, Simon
1.0 spider ball python, Noah
0.1 genetic blurry ball python, Eleanor
"You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed."
- the fox
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Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
 Originally Posted by WingedWolfPsion
Well, I am 37, not sure what your age is, lol.
You're about 33 years older than me, making me 14 y/o
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Re: Ladies of Bp.Net, I need some help.
 Originally Posted by CoolioTiffany
You're about 33 years older than me, making me 14 y/o 
You're using fuzzy math, Tiff
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