Identity Freud?? Can anyone help?

So I know nothing about laws or anything but the story is that a close friend of mine got into a huge fight with her parents. Her parents decide to call the credit card company in which she has her card...in her name and account and cancelled it.

As soon as she told me this I was like ..how can this be..Doesn't the card holder have to cancel it?? It is her own card and it is not affiliated in any way of he parents.
The story is the representative of the credit card company asked to speak to the card holder(my friend) so they can confirm that she is giving her dad permission to cancel the account on her behalf. So...the dad hands the phone over to her mom who pretends to be here. They ended up cancelling the card on her without her permission.

Now they have kicked her out of her house, wont give her car keys to the car SHE OWNS and pays for. They wont let her in the house to get her clothes or anything. I actually have her stayin in my apartment because I live a block away.. I'm not even there..I'm up at school.

As of right now...she got her car back...she keeps a spare key underneath the tire. Is there anyway we can get them in trouble for canceling the credit card?? she's not looking for money or anything...She just wants to her parents to pay for their actions. It just makes me sick how parents can do that to their own flesh and blood. They knew she had no place to go, they expected her to roam the streets all night.

sorry for the rant...things like this piss me off. I could never hate my kid enough to let them roam the streets all night

How old is she? If over 18, then yes, she has legal right to sue her parents for identity fraud if she can prove it unless her parents co-signed on the account.

I have a friend who kicked out her 18-year-old out of her house to roam the streets on her own. My friend had strict house rules - no random guys coming in and out of the house - she has another daughter that she wants to protect. And the 18-year-old would sneak them in. My friend does not allow her kids alcoholic beverages before 21 years old. She comes home drunk as a skunk puking her guts out that she had to take her daughter to the ER for alcohol poisoning. My friend has her under her car insurance. The girl wrecked her car which made the insurance premium jump up by $200 a month. So, she took her out of her insurance because she couldn't afford it. So the daughter didn't have a car when she got kicked out. So, she's basically screwed. But, I completely sided with my friend on this one. If you can't behave, then hey, good luck on your own.

Not that I'm saying this is what happened to your friend. I'm just saying that just because a parent kicked a kid out of the house doesn't necessarily mean they love them less.

That is very illegal. Call the local sherrif's office, get a hold of a lawyer(at least for advice on state laws).

Retaining her property is also tantamount to larceny.

It will be a pain in the ass and require dedication and time to bring up charges, but I'm sure it can be done.

There is never any guarantee of legal punishment, but it is quite possible that she can get one or both parents with probation or even minimal jail time.

I'm not an expert, but have had a bit of experience with criminal and civil court..

I am in no way condoning revenge, just giving you the facts. Just curious, what was the fight over? You don't have to tell us if its private but I can't understand why in the world parents could do that to their kid.

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Originally Posted by anatess

How old is she? If over 18, then yes, she has legal right to sue her parents for identity fraud if she can prove it unless her parents co-signed on the account.

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She's 20. I don't think they co-signed..I'll ask her.

She's a good kid..I can't even think of what they could of fought about to the point where they would kick her out. I have met her parents and they are pretty crazy/strict. Her mom makes her squeegee the shower doors after she takes a shower.

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Originally Posted by anatess

I'm just saying that just because a parent kicked a kid out of the house doesn't necessarily mean they love them less.

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I have to disagree. Then again, none of my family members are jerks.

just tried to call her.....the number is disconnected. I guess her parents took that away too....She was paying for it but the account was under her dad's name so he had the right to.

She abrubtly signed off like an hour ago in the middle of a conversation, so i called her and her dad took her internet cord cause he pays for the internet

Was the credit card issued based on the credit of the parents with the girl merely issued a card? Is the title to the car and the insurance and license plate in the name of the parents in order to save her big money even though she is paying for it? If so the parents have done nothing wrong here. They probably don't want to be liable for her if she is not following their rules in the home where she was probably living for free. They probably told her to get her own credit card and that she could have the car when she got her own insurance and license plate. Her parents will probably report the car as stolen if it is in their name.Maybe I'm wrong but it sounds like an old story to me about a kid that won't follow the rules of the home and will now find out how unappreciative that she has been of what her parents have been giving her.

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Originally Posted by dsirkle

Was the credit card issued based on the credit of the parents with the girl merely issued a card? Is the title to the car and the insurance and license plate in the name of the parents in order to save her big money even though she is paying for it? If so the parents have done nothing wrong here. They probably don't want to be liable for her if she is not following their rules in the home where she was probably living for free. They probably told her to get her own credit card and that she could have the car when she got her own insurance and license plate. Her parents will probably report the car as stolen if it is in their name.Maybe I'm wrong but it sounds like an old story to me.

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Her own credit, not affiliated anyway to her parents. Title of car and insurance is in her name alone.

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Originally Posted by chetman7

Her own credit, not affiliated anyway to her parents. Title of car and insurance is in her name alone.

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if those things are true it would be illegal for the parents to cancel the card and keep her car from her.

Definitely sounds illegal. -Shrugs.-

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Originally Posted by mainbutter

I have to disagree. Then again, none of my family members are jerks.

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None of mine are either - well, not THAT bad. But, my husband was kicked out of his house when he was 18... on New Years Day. My husband was being a teen-age jerk and that it killed his parents to have to do it, but it was the only way for him to learn. Which, I was very grateful for because then my husband shaped up (can't afford drugs and an apartment at the same time), so he was a very upstanding young man when I met him at age 20. And I love his parents very very much. And so does he.

This is a family matter that I think is best worked out privately before running to the authorities. That could leave scars that won't ever heal. Perhaps this young woman could find a third party to act as a mediator between herself and her parents. They could meet in a neutral place with this person and discuss what needs done to make them all comfortable.

Quite honestly this is a 20 year old adult. It sounds like she needs to leave the nest and establish her own home where she can make her own rules. If she can afford a car, credit cards and so forth there's no reason she shouldn't be able to manage a nice, small apartment of her own. There seems a really strange thing going on with this generation that they want to stay home with mommy and daddy but still want to be an independent adult. That just generally never works out very well.

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Originally Posted by frankykeno

This is a family matter that I think is best worked out privately before running to the authorities.

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There are three sides to every story.

Once the legal system gets involved the decisions may be taken out of the hands of both parties. Best to work it out privately, if possible.

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Originally Posted by JohnNJ

There are three sides to every story.

Once the legal system gets involved the decisions may be taken out of the hands of both parties. Best to work it out privately, if possible.

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Exactly. If trying to resolve this privately doesn't work, then no harm done really but once you call in the police or the lawyers it gets very hard to reverse any decisions you've made. I think an attempt at mediation first is probably the best course of action (and this young lady setting up her own residence seperate from her parents).

Hi,

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Originally Posted by chetman7

I have met her parents and they are pretty crazy/strict. Her mom makes her squeegee the shower doors after she takes a shower.

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Annoying possibly but hardly terrible - my dad still makes me do that when I go home to visit as water spots on the glass get on his nerves. :rolleyes:

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Originally Posted by frankykeno

Quite honestly this is a 20 year old adult. It sounds like she needs to leave the nest and establish her own home where she can make her own rules. If she can afford a car, credit cards and so forth there's no reason she shouldn't be able to manage a nice, small apartment of her own.

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Indeed it's not like she is too Jung to survive on her own or anything. Sorry couldn't help myself. :oops:

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Originally Posted by frankykeno

This is a family matter that I think is best worked out privately before running to the authorities.

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Originally Posted by JohnNJ

Once the legal system gets involved the decisions may be taken out of the hands of both parties. Best to work it out privately, if possible.

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This is very true - aside from the emotional and familial fall out your parents credit rating is usually linked to your own in the credit companies database and having them convicted of identity theft and similar offenses could ruin the credit rating of everyone involved for a very, very long time.

I would say that the legal/ criminal justice system should be the very last thing tried.


dr del

It depends on the state, but if she is 20, the car and insurance and credit card are all in her name without anything affliated with her parents, then yes it's illegil.
However, if she is refuseing to follow the rules of the house, no matter what YOU think of them, then they have every right to boot her out. It's THEIR house, and THEIR rules. It's not like they threw a child out on the street.
If she has the ability to pay for a car, credit card payments, insurance etc.. let her get her own place to live. Her parents have every right to take away any privledge that they pay for. I don't have a lot of sympathy for the "they kicked her out", since no one I know at 20 doesn't have someone they can go bum a couch off of. Obviously she has, since she is staying with you.
She should be able to call the credit card company and let them know it was not her, and they will re-instate her card, with a security feature to make sure no one can cancel it that isn't her. (security question). If she has the spare key to the car, and removes it, then she's clear there. If the parents report it stolen, then she can easily tell the police, "Here's the title in my name, the insurance in my name, and the registration in my name. They filed a false report". If the parents don't call it in stolen, then all they did was take the key, which is petty, but not enough to bother with authorites. Since the parents did not USE the credit card, it's not identity theft, per se. It's again.. petty.
If any of it is in their names... at all, co-signing, using their insurance, etc.. they were within their rights.
Good luck with your friend. She should get her own place, and stop trying to live with mom and dad, if she wants to have her own rules.

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Originally Posted by dr del

Indeed it's not like she is too Jung to survive on her own or anything. Sorry couldn't help myself. :oops:

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:rofl: I'm glad *someone* said it!

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Originally Posted by cshouston

:rofl: I'm glad *someone* said it!

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Came looking for Freudian or Jungian references, left satisfied.:)

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Originally Posted by dr del

Indeed it's not like she is too Jung to survive on her own or anything. Sorry couldn't help myself. :oops:



dr del

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I can't believe it took this long! :D