My mother turned off the heat mat!! :'(

I'm really worried about my snek, Bellatrix... My mum went into my room while I was at work and turned off Bella's heat mat because she's a total idiot. I have no idea how long its been off for - most likely just overnight, but it could have been much longer. I can't find much online about what to do, but Bella is freezing :'( I've got her inside my dressing gown against my chest while the heat mat warms back up to the right temperature, but I'm really worried she might get sick. Its nearly feeding day as well, so I'm worried she might have a problem eating if she's too stressed. I can feel her moving around now and her tongue is flickering a bit so I know she's not dead... But she was so cold and still when I picked her up. This has never happened before (I've had Bels for almost 2 years and never had an incident like this). Any advice or info would be gratefully received, thank youuu.

She will be fine. Turn the heat mat back on and leave her alone. Skip this feeding day and try the following week


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snakes handle cold temperatures much better than hot ones; she'll be alright.

As they said above ^


I'm more interested in WHY your mum turned the mat off !! ???

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Originally Posted by Zincubus

As they said above ^


I'm more interested in WHY your mum turned the mat off !! ???

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The old bat has no sense of personal space. I had to move back home after graduating from university and even though I'm 23 now, she refuses to leave my belongings alone, insisting that its her house so everything belongs to her, pretty much. She often goes in my room when I'm at work purely to mess with my things. I think she turned the plug socket off without really thinking about her actions or the consequences thereof. She probably just wanted to assert her dominance over my life by turning it off to 'save electricity' or some other poor excuse. I doubt she even thought it through. I often arrive home and find my mirror has been moved to a different spot, or my clean laundry has been placed somewhere new. Its a bit creepy and I'm moving out soon, thank heavens.

Anyway, I know you didn't ask for my life story but I didn't want people to think this is a regular occurrence or that my mother intentionally tried to hurt my snake.

Sorry about this. Wow.

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Originally Posted by snakesandmoonbeams

The old bat has no sense of personal space. I had to move back home after graduating from university and even though I'm 23 now, she refuses to leave my belongings alone, insisting that its her house so everything belongs to her, pretty much. She often goes in my room when I'm at work purely to mess with my things. I think she turned the plug socket off without really thinking about her actions or the consequences thereof. She probably just wanted to assert her dominance over my life by turning it off to 'save electricity' or some other poor excuse. I doubt she even thought it through. I often arrive home and find my mirror has been moved to a different spot, or my clean laundry has been placed somewhere new. Its a bit creepy and I'm moving out soon, thank heavens.

Anyway, I know you didn't ask for my life story but I didn't want people to think this is a regular occurrence or that my mother intentionally tried to hurt my snake.

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I've discerned a few things through this post.

1. You should probably be grateful your mother has a house for you to fall back on since you apparently had to move back in.

2. You aren't checking your husbandry often enough if you don't know how long the heat was off for.

3. Really? a mirror and some clothes required a tantrum? lol. No offense but that's just silly.

As others have said your snake will be fine now that you've got his husbandry back on point. Try not to be so hard on your mom though. Don't refer to her as an idiot or old bat especially publicly. That's not cool. Nobody's perfect and remember without our parents there's no us so always show love, gratitude, and respect. ;)

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Originally Posted by predatorkeeper87

I've discerned a few things through this post.

1. You should probably be grateful your mother has a house for you to fall back on since you apparently had to move back in.

2. You aren't checking your husbandry often enough if you don't know how long the heat was off for.

3. Really? a mirror and some clothes required a tantrum? lol. No offense but that's just silly.

---

1. She never said she was ungrateful, think back to 23, privacy means a lot at any age especially when your becoming a young adult. Graduating from a University is a great accomplishment and think of the finacial burden.

2. I don't know how often your at home but I work 12-16 hours a day during the Summer. Accidents happen.

3. I never heard a tantrum.. Did i miss a Post?

I have come down hard on people that open their 1st thread making statements like " Im new on here but lurked for a long time, ive done tons of reseach and want to buy some Ball Pythons to breed, what enclose, heating and morphs should i buy" = ANSWER (NONE) ...

But this wasn't that, this was a honest mistaken that can happen to almost anyone in a similar living arangment and they wanted to know what the consequences might be.....
Be nice until its time not to be nice (ROADHOUSE) ;)

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Originally Posted by predatorkeeper87

3. Really? a mirror and some clothes required a tantrum? lol. No offense but that's just silly.

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i think it has more to do with not feeling their space is respected. i would have panic attacks if i continuously came home to find things moved around by someone other than me; i'd be anxious to leave my room. i understand where OP comes from: moving back home is a big adjustment (i went through it and still live at home) from having control over your own space to being under your parents' thumbs. however they're still a person and the notion of their space and belongings should be respected is not that crazy of an idea.

just wanted to provide another side of the story. :D

OP... your snake will be fine.

I kind of agree with Sully on this one to an extent, but times are changing and there may be some cultural differences here too. It has been my observation over the years that the more automated and liberal a society becomes the slower people mature. My grandmother had a house and kids at 16. My parents at 18. At 18 I had a security clearance and was responsible for people's lives. I had my first child and house at 23. My oldest son got it together at 26. I see a trend here and not just within my own family.

The one thing the OP did that I really think is improper was hashing internal family issues publicly. Unless there is something illegal going on respect your family and iron differences out internally.

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Originally Posted by Mr Sully

1. She never said she was ungrateful, think back to 23, privacy means a lot at any age especially when your becoming a young adult. Graduating from a University is a great accomplishment and think of the finacial burden.

2. I don't know how often your at home but I work 12-16 hours a day during the Summer. Accidents happen.

3. I never heard a tantrum.. Did i miss a Post?

I have come down hard on people that open their 1st thread making statements like " Im new on here but lurked for a long time, ive done tons of reseach and want to buy some Ball Pythons to breed, what enclose, heating and morphs should i buy" = ANSWER (NONE) ...

But this wasn't that, this was a honest mistaken that can happen to almost anyone in a similar living arangment and they wanted to know what the consequences might be.....
Be nice until its time not to be nice (ROADHOUSE) ;)

---

I graduated college, I'm aware of the finances. I haven't lived at home since 19, with the exception of being next door now that my mom is alone and needs help.

I check when I wake up at 4 am, again when I get home around 4 pm and before I go to bed. This takes 15 seconds each time lol, no excuse not to notice your heat is malfunctioning/off.

OP putting his/her mother on blast, especially calling her an idiot, in two long posts when all that was required was "My heat mat was turned off for a while, will my snake be ok?" sounds to me much like a tantrum, we may be at an impasse on this however. No reason to air the problems on the internet.


Right, a mistake, which did not call for the response it received here in my book but again that may be an impasse. I come from a generation or at least a family where if you call your mother an idiot it will win you the taste slapped out of your mouth.


Patrick Swayze is gone man, we gotta let him go lol.

Relax the snake will be fine, one day without belly eat is not gonna kill your snake they are more resilient than you think, and rather than bash your mother in public (you know the one that gave you life, put a roof over your head all those years, took you and your snake back in when you needed) just be thankful to have her in your life (that's what grown up mature people do)

As someone who's primary community consists of abuse and recovery victims of varying ages: moms behavior has red flags all over. Whether or not she's doing it consciously, that is an invasion of space with intent to gain control over her grown adult kid. I had more respect and autonomy at 16 than what this person who has apparently successfully completed at least one round of college is being given. So yes, having someone invade your space, touch your things, and endanger the well being of your pets is grounds for being upset, and I would say justifies venting a little.

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Originally Posted by predatorkeeper87

I graduated college, I'm aware of the finances. I haven't lived at home since 19, with the exception of being next door now that my mom is alone and needs help.

I check when I wake up at 4 am, again when I get home around 4 pm and before I go to bed. This takes 15 seconds each time lol, no excuse not to notice your heat is malfunctioning/off.

OP putting his/her mother on blast, especially calling her an idiot, in two long posts when all that was required was "My heat mat was turned off for a while, will my snake be ok?" sounds to me much like a tantrum, we may be at an impasse on this however. No reason to air the problems on the internet.


Right, a mistake, which did not call for the response it received here in my book but again that may be an impasse. I come from a generation or at least a family where if you call your mother an idiot it will win you the taste slapped out of your mouth.


Patrick Swayze is gone man, we gotta let him go lol.

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I save my tongue lashing for people on here that are Ignorant, Lazy & Clueless who will in fact ruin the lives of animals.
I didnt go to college, in my day "luckily" learning a trade, dedication, hard work, common sense and life skills gave me opportunity. I have 2 Girls so I understand the bit of Sass with the side of Dramatics..my girls call me "Retarded" and I call them Princess & My Angel... But hey maybe it's a NY thing because we love eachother to the Moon & Back :rofl:

Yes Swayze is Decades past old news.. But he sure did get the girls excited back in the day and I have to thank him for that;)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mr Sully

I save my tongue lashing for people on here that are Ignorant, Lazy & Clueless who will in fact ruin the lives of animals.
I didnt go to college, in my day "luckily" learning a trade, dedication, hard work, common sense and life skills gave me opportunity. I have 2 Girls so I understand the bit of Sass with the side of Dramatics..my girls call me "Retarded" and I call them Princess & My Angel... But hey maybe it's a NY thing because we love eachother to the Moon & Back :rofl:

Yes Swayze is Decades past old news.. But he sure did get the girls excited back in the day and I have to thank him for that;)

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Believe me...I would have loved to learn a trade earlier or in fact instead of college haha. I didn't tongue lash the OP by any means, just speaking my mind lol.

I bet OP's mom loves them as well, just a different type of person lol. hahaha I don't know dude...the NY people I know are meeeean! lol kidding.

hahaha ahhhh yes, the ol' switcheroo lol

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Originally Posted by Lizardlicks

As someone who's primary community consists of abuse and recovery victims of varying ages: moms behavior has red flags all over. Whether or not she's doing it consciously, that is an invasion of space with intent to gain control over her grown adult kid. I had more respect and autonomy at 16 than what this person who has apparently successfully completed at least one round of college is being given. So yes, having someone invade your space, touch your things, and endanger the well being of your pets is grounds for being upset, and I would say justifies venting a little.

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pffft! this...this right here is why kids want a "safe place" to run and cry if it rains too hard...we equate moving a mirror to mental abuse...

OP can hash it out with their mom offline, if they can't get along, OP can move out. Its that simple. Come on people...

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Originally Posted by predatorkeeper87

pffft! this...this right here is why kids want a "safe place" to run and cry if it rains too hard...we equate moving a mirror to mental abuse....

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he never said they were equal: he stated the behavior described by OP is a common behavior for abusers described by the victims he's worked with. this is why he used the term "red flag." you tried to equate her being upset to a tantrum; he tried to explain that OP mom's behavior can have serious consequences on a person if they get out of hand.

just trying to help you understand where they were coming from.

Not to mention we're getting one side of the story here.

The thought of one of my kids talking about me like this on a public forum when I'm older and nice enough to let them live with me as adults .... I'm cringing.

But you know, none of us know the whole story either way I guess.

At the end of the day, the snake should be just fine... get the levels back to where they should be, maybe put a sticky note near the enclosure that reads PLEASE DO NOT UNPLUG as a reminder. It could have been a complete and innocent accident for all we know.

I don't think you mentioned it, but do you have a thermostat for your heat mat? My Jumpstart thermostat is hung on the wall so I can always see the temperature of my UTH. If you don't have a thermostat, the heater should be unplugged as of now anyway because it can reach well over 100 degrees!

If you do have a thermostat, consider mounting it on the wall so the temps are always visible.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by tttaylorrr

he never said they were equal: he stated the behavior described by OP is a common behavior for abusers described by the victims he's worked with. this is why he used the term "red flag." you tried to equate her being upset to a tantrum; he tried to explain that OP mom's behavior can have serious consequences on a person if they get out of hand.

just trying to help you understand where they were coming from.

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you are welcome to disagree with everything I post ma'am, but I can assure you that what the OP described will have no lasting consequences other than OP not getting their way until they move out.

I understand the line of thought you and the others are sharing, but I don't agree with it. Its silly to call your mother an idiot for the reasons stated, plain and simple.

Since more than one person has an issue with the word "tantrum" thus far, I'll reengage my argument with the rephrasing of airing OP's dirty laundry for no reason instead.

Don't get me wrong, all you guys are a great bunch, but I love when we don't agree about everything. Makes my day a little more interesting. Hopefully the OP learns a couple things. Special kudos to predatorkeeper. Nice to hear that a least a few from your generation have the mental alignment to survive if the power goes out for a few weeks.

When I was 15 and my mom came in to clean my room/pick up laundry/do whatever normal house things moms do, and she accidentally unplugged an important heat mat in the process, I would get pissed and come online and call her an "old bat", a "total idiot", and complain about personal space and her "touching my things" and invading my space and accuse her of abuse. I honest to god would have done something very similar when I got mad haha.

Fortunately, I'm 23!



The snake is fine, the OP has a house and doesn't need to pay $1600 a month of their own rent, heck.

.. opinions are my own. LOL

I actually can't imagine any of my peers, even 21 year olds, responding this way on the internet to their mom unplugging a heat mat. It sounds MUCH younger than us. So I'm actually having a hard time believing the OP is as old as they claim they are lol.

(Okay that's all, backing out)

I think the post has gotten way off topic. If I was a young person & had a problem with my Husbandry, asked for advice and got all this personal Nonsense, I'd probably find somewhere else to get help or get none at all. After all we should be here to help the animal in the end.
Just because you pass by pigs rolling in the mud doesn't mean you have to STOP & join them.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by predatorkeeper87

I've discerned a few things through this post.

1. You should probably be grateful your mother has a house for you to fall back on since you apparently had to move back in.

2. You aren't checking your husbandry often enough if you don't know how long the heat was off for.

3. Really? a mirror and some clothes required a tantrum? lol. No offense but that's just silly.

---

Wow,

I never said I was ungrateful for a place to live, only that I would like my personal space to be respected, especially where my snake's, or any living animal's, welfare is concerned.
I check the husbandry every morning and usually every night, but I work really long shifts. The reason I didn't know how long the mat had been turned off for is because my mother couldn't recall the time she turned it off herself. Nothing to do with how I care for my snake. And at no point was I throwing a tantrum; I was answering a question that somebody asked me.

You should try trolling less and maybe also try being a nicer person. I dread to think how you deal with real life people.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Lizardlicks

As someone who's primary community consists of abuse and recovery victims of varying ages: moms behavior has red flags all over. Whether or not she's doing it consciously, that is an invasion of space with intent to gain control over her grown adult kid. I had more respect and autonomy at 16 than what this person who has apparently successfully completed at least one round of college is being given. So yes, having someone invade your space, touch your things, and endanger the well being of your pets is grounds for being upset, and I would say justifies venting a little.

---

Thank you, I'm glad someone gets it. I was mostly angry that she had potentially put my snake's welfare at risk. Now I know she's alright, and I've spoken to my mother about the dangers of fiddling with the snake's home, its all okay.

1. You can THINK about rapping your mom in the head with feeding tongs but you can't actually do it. (Humor, people)
and
2. If I understand you, the wall plug is controlled by the wall switch? I have that situation in my viv room, but I need that wall plug. For many people, clicking off a switch is an automatic behavior. It kept happening with my son (and my Herpstat 6 was controlled by that switch...uuuggghhh), so I covered the switch.You can tape the switch in place and just lift the tape to turn the outlet off and on as you need to. I covered mine with a cute, deep-framed little picture because I didn't want tape just hanging on my wall.
Also,
people here are very well-intentioned. Sometimes a person's button gets pushed, but it smooths over, just like it should in a family.
Welcome to BP.net. I love it here!

My response to you was not a troll, it was my general feelings towards how you act to your mother, especially at the age you claim.

I'm a straightforward person, I have no issues communicating in the real world, but thank you for proving my point further.

Welcome to Bp.net, you can get a lot of great info here and the community is great, just don't go off saying rude things about someone willing to let you in their home and I have nothing but help for you.

P.S. long shifts are not an excuse to neglect an animal you chose to take in. I'm not saying your a bad danger noodle parent but there are no excuses worthy in my book unless you, your family or the house is on fire.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mr Sully

I think the post has gotten way off topic. If I was a young person & had a problem with my Husbandry, asked for advice and got all this personal Nonsense, I'd probably find somewhere else to get help or get none at all. After all we should be here to help the animal in the end.
Just because you pass by pigs rolling in the mud doesn't mean you have to STOP & join them.

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I'll agree I strayed off topic but as you can tell I'm fairly straightforward and will say what needs said in my mind haha. No disrespect intended to you or anyone else in the thread on my part.

No disrespect taken... I just worry people don't want to hear personal attacks whether they opened the door or not and then the animal looses who possibly needed the help if they say the heck with this FORUM and the Super Snake Keepers on it. Lmbo.

OP, how's your snake doing? I'm sure that she is okay because like others mentioned ball pythons can handle colder temperatures better than warmer ones. Try to calmly explain to your mom that it's very important that she doesn't touch any of your cords for the ball python's enclosure. I'm sure that she will understand. If not, it's time to find a new place for you and Bellatrix to live.

Haha what an intense thread for such a simple question. I am glad your snake is doing well. Don't worry not all of us here are so "straight forward".

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Originally Posted by AntTheDestroyer

Haha what an intense thread for such a simple question. I am glad your snake is doing well. Don't worry not all of us here are so "straight forward".

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I only used 3 simple lines initially, everyone else seemed to have an issue with it so it turned into a conversation. I didn't see any tempers lost so I wouldn't call it intense. Certainly not as intense as that thread with the kid who said his parents were going to starve his snakes to death, which to me was the same situation...a kid blasting their parents about the care of their animals....

I guess it all just depends on people's moods when they swing into a thread, and the passive aggressive use of quotation marks lol.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mr Sully

No disrespect taken... I just worry people don't want to hear personal attacks whether they opened the door or not and then the animal looses who possibly needed the help if they say the heck with this FORUM and the Super Snake Keepers on it. Lmbo.

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fair enough, this thread started like that thread with the kid who claimed his parents wouldn't let him feed his snakes in my book, so I said it like it was. Guess I'll bow out now since I seem to be on the minority end of things. good day gentlemen and ladies lol.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by JodanOrNoDan

Don't get me wrong, all you guys are a great bunch, but I love when we don't agree about everything. Makes my day a little more interesting. Hopefully the OP learns a couple things. Special kudos to predatorkeeper. Nice to hear that a least a few from your generation have the mental alignment to survive if the power goes out for a few weeks.

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Thank you, it kills me to see someone say that about their parents for no good reason...

and that's the beauty of open forums, good discussion. Some people get a little too hurt over it I suppose but that's life lol.

Wow...I don't agree with the bashing on the parents but simple someone ASKED why the op mom did it. That's a personal question that required a personal answer.
So personally I think this thread should get back on topic or stop completely and the op can open a new thread if still worried because everyone is pushing the op away and what happens next time they have an issue? They're gonna go to another forum or none at all and put the snakes life at risk because the op can't feel comfortable to be able to talk on here. Just my 2 cents though. This is exactly why I don't like other forums and stick to this one. Except some everyone is just rude or expects you know everything blah blah blah. That's why I love bp.net let's just drop this thread to much criticism and hate :)


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Quote:

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Originally Posted by BBotteron

what happens next time they have an issue?

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Maybe they will start off like an adult and not like this......

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Originally Posted by snakesandmoonbeams

because she's a total idiot.

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Originally Posted by snakesandmoonbeams

The old bat has no sense of personal space.

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Just an FYI, YOU don't have personal space until YOU are paying for it. :gj:

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Originally Posted by PitOnTheProwl

Maybe they will start off like an adult and not like this......



Just an FYI, YOU don't have personal space until YOU are paying for it. :gj:

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I was hoping someone saw that point...its not your space until you buy the roof...

I'm not disagreeing with any of this I'm just saying this thread should be locked it's become off topic and if I remember correctly the issue is solved. Sorry if I'm coming off on the wrong way I'm a bit tired lol


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Quote:

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Originally Posted by predatorkeeper87

fair enough, this thread started like that thread with the kid who claimed his parents wouldn't let him feed his snakes in my book, so I said it like it was. Guess I'll bow out now since I seem to be on the minority end of things. good day gentlemen and ladies lol.

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Don't feel too bad, a lot of people probably just don't want to get involved but I'm with you. You just don't go bashing your mom publicly, makes you look like an immature teenager that doesn't appreciate what the parents have gone through for them. You don't like what your parents are doing, take a hint, it's time to be a responsible adult and move out. I went through the same crap when I got out of college, my dad was always bumping heads with me for no good reason. I got the hint and moved out. The years after that my father and I had the best relationship we probably ever had. It was just time to grow up. Op has parents that love him I'm sure but they are probably ready for him to move on but can't kick him out.

On the other hand, I do agree with some of the others, the mother is completely invading privacy and handling things the wrong way. Yes it is her house so she has the right to do what she wants but there is a much better/healthier way to go about it. Simply talk about what's going on.

My take is both Op and mother are in the wrong, Mother shouldn't invade privacy, op can move out but shouldn't bash mother publicly.

Interesting thread to say the least, may have got off topic but the new topic is more interesting anyway lol.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by BBotteron

I'm not disagreeing with any of this I'm just saying this thread should be locked it's become off topic and if I remember correctly the issue is solved. Sorry if I'm coming off on the wrong way I'm a bit tired lol


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I agree. Whatever the backstory is about why the heat mat got unplugged, OP got their answer. The snake is going to be fine.

This is a snake forum... not a soap box to lecture someone on how they talk about their parents on the internet. Scold them all you want but do you really think it's going to change their behavior if they already have done it? Was it wrong? Sure. Does it really matter? No.

Just saying. Answer the questions, ignore the stuff that really doesn't matter to you or the snake. I've been shaking my head at this whole thread.


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Quote:

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Originally Posted by Kira

OP, how's your snake doing? I'm sure that she is okay because like others mentioned ball pythons can handle colder temperatures better than warmer ones. Try to calmly explain to your mom that it's very important that she doesn't touch any of your cords for the ball python's enclosure. I'm sure that she will understand. If not, it's time to find a new place for you and Bellatrix to live.

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Hey, Bellatrix is fine now, she returned to normal behaviour after a few hours. Thank you for asking :)

I did have a conversation with my mother about not turning off the plug socket, and she apologised profusely and seemed genuinely sorry that she'd potentially put unnecessary stress on my snake. I do have a new place to move into, but they need to re-fit the plumbing before I can move in - hopefully it will only be another month or so!! My new house is a very pet-friendly place so I'm sure Bella & I will be much happier there. :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by snakesandmoonbeams

Hey, Bellatrix is fine now, she returned to normal behaviour after a few hours. Thank you for asking :)

I did have a conversation with my mother about not turning off the plug socket, and she apologised profusely and seemed genuinely sorry that she'd potentially put unnecessary stress on my snake. I do have a new place to move into, but they need to re-fit the plumbing before I can move in - hopefully it will only be another month or so!! My new house is a very pet-friendly place so I'm sure Bella & I will be much happier there. :)

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Excellent . Happy Days !!


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I would just like to make one final post to clarify the situation to people, who clearly know nothing about my life or myself as a person, but who seemed intent on judging me and accusing me of neglecting my snake.

I pay rent to my mother. I am not living in her house for free. I do a LOT to look after her, the house, and also her animals as well. I moved back in when I graduated university because she was seriously ill and needed some help at home. Now that she's better, I'm moving out ASAP. To assume that I was living here free and being disrespectful is a gross exaggeration and very unkind.

In NO WAY do I neglect my snake. I can't believe I even have to explain this to some of you. I've had Bels for nearly 2 years, as I mentioned before, and she is the love of my life. She is very healthy and happy. When I get home at 2am from work, it would be incredibly inconsiderate to my family to turn on the lights to check on Bella's temperature etc, especially when usually the temp. is steady and the husbandry is not adjusted by anyone except myself (usually). We have a small home and sound/light permeate very easily, and because my mother is a light sleeper I choose not to wake her up because that would only cause more issues.

Issues, which include the invasion of my space. I know perhaps I shouldn't have labeled my mother as an 'old bat', but I'm sure you'd be angry too if someone had impacted negatively on the welfare of your living creature whom you love. As a human person, I feel I deserve the right to have my own personal space in a home WHICH I PAY RENT IN. To have my belongings (which I paid for with my own hard-earned money) moved, stolen, broken, or adjusted without my permission is not okay. Especially when that impacts on Bellatrix and her wellbeing.

As I mentioned previously, there has never been an incident like this before as I always make sure she is at the right temperature, fed, and cleaned. I think the more judgmental and, quite frankly, rude people among you should take a long, hard look at yourselves. Yes, this is a public forum, and freedom of speech is allowed, but you really needn't have been so rude. I was worried for my snake, and angry at the flagrant disrespect of my mother and the way she potentially endangered a living being. I wanted a simple answer and some advice. Someone asked me why she turned off the heat mat, so I answered honestly. I don't feel I should have been trolled and put down as much as you have been doing, since none of you actually knew my living situation. Just because someone is older than me, doesn't entitle them to full respect, especially when their behaviour is sub par.

In future I'll keep my questions short and simple so I don't hurt the sensitivities of those of you who can't bear to hear about a human being living a human life with human problems.

Finally, I just want to say thank you to those of you who actually provided me with solid advice and were understanding about the situation. I came here for advice and moral support that my baby would be okay, and I am now happy that Bellatrix will be fine. :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by snakesandm
oonbeams;2511566

Hey, Bellatrix is fine now, she returned to normal behaviour after a few hours. Thank you for asking :)

I did have a conversation with my mother about not turning off the plug socket, and she apologised profusely and seemed genuinely sorry that she'd potentially put unnecessary stress on my snake. I do have a new place to move into, but they need to re-fit the plumbing before I can move in - hopefully it will only be another month or so!! My new house is a very pet-friendly place so I'm sure Bella & I will be much happier there. :)

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Now THIS is the kind of post I like to see. I'm glad the noodle is feeling better, and I'm glad you've hashed everything out with your mom. Also congrats on your new place.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by snakesandmoonbeams

I would just like to make one final post to clarify the situation to people, who clearly know nothing about my life or myself as a person, but who seemed intent on judging me and accusing me of neglecting my snake.

I pay rent to my mother. I am not living in her house for free. I do a LOT to look after her, the house, and also her animals as well. I moved back in when I graduated university because she was seriously ill and needed some help at home. Now that she's better, I'm moving out ASAP. To assume that I was living here free and being disrespectful is a gross exaggeration and very unkind.

In NO WAY do I neglect my snake. I can't believe I even have to explain this to some of you. I've had Bels for nearly 2 years, as I mentioned before, and she is the love of my life. She is very healthy and happy. When I get home at 2am from work, it would be incredibly inconsiderate to my family to turn on the lights to check on Bella's temperature etc, especially when usually the temp. is steady and the husbandry is not adjusted by anyone except myself (usually). We have a small home and sound/light permeate very easily, and because my mother is a light sleeper I choose not to wake her up because that would only cause more issues.

Issues, which include the invasion of my space. I know perhaps I shouldn't have labeled my mother as an 'old bat', but I'm sure you'd be angry too if someone had impacted negatively on the welfare of your living creature whom you love. As a human person, I feel I deserve the right to have my own personal space in a home WHICH I PAY RENT IN. To have my belongings (which I paid for with my own hard-earned money) moved, stolen, broken, or adjusted without my permission is not okay. Especially when that impacts on Bellatrix and her wellbeing.

As I mentioned previously, there has never been an incident like this before as I always make sure she is at the right temperature, fed, and cleaned. I think the more judgmental and, quite frankly, rude people among you should take a long, hard look at yourselves. Yes, this is a public forum, and freedom of speech is allowed, but you really needn't have been so rude. I was worried for my snake, and angry at the flagrant disrespect of my mother and the way she potentially endangered a living being. I wanted a simple answer and some advice. Someone asked me why she turned off the heat mat, so I answered honestly. I don't feel I should have been trolled and put down as much as you have been doing, since none of you actually knew my living situation. Just because someone is older than me, doesn't entitle them to full respect, especially when their behaviour is sub par.

In future I'll keep my questions short and simple so I don't hurt the sensitivities of those of you who can't bear to hear about a human being living a human life with human problems.

Finally, I just want to say thank you to those of you who actually provided me with solid advice and were understanding about the situation. I came here for advice and moral support that my baby would be okay, and I am now happy that Bellatrix will be fine. :)

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Rather than beat a dead horse here, I'll just say the fact you were taking care of your mom and paying for a room changes the OP dynamic considerably.

I made observations based on the info provided, which was incomplete. I can assure you if you took what I or anyone else in this thread said as rude then you haven't experienced enough life yet lol, as there was nothing in this thread bordering on "rude".

I still think you have a lot of learning to do in life, but that's up to you to do my dear. You are young, I'd consider all the posts in this thread and learn on them rather than take offense, its simply better in the long run.

Again, I'm glad the snake is fine.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by predatorkeeper87

I only used 3 simple lines initially, everyone else seemed to have an issue with it so it turned into a conversation. I didn't see any tempers lost so I wouldn't call it intense. Certainly not as intense as that thread with the kid who said his parents were going to starve his snakes to death, which to me was the same situation...a kid blasting their parents about the care of their animals....

I guess it all just depends on people's moods when they swing into a thread, and the passive aggressive use of quotation marks lol.

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I certainly was not intending any aggressive tone. In fact I was feeling quite jovial when I posted. That being said there is a difference between being straight forward with your answers and forcing advice on someone.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by predatorkeeper87

Rather than beat a dead horse here, I'll just say the fact you were taking care of your mom and paying for a room changes the OP dynamic considerably.

I made observations based on the info provided, which was incomplete. I can assure you if you took what I or anyone else in this thread said as rude then you haven't experienced enough life yet lol, as there was nothing in this thread bordering on "rude".

I still think you have a lot of learning to do in life, but that's up to you to do my dear. You are young, I'd consider all the posts in this thread and learn on them rather than take offense, its simply better in the long run.

Again, I'm glad the snake is fine.

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I'm sorry but this is exactly beating a dead horse.

You made assumptions about OP. Yes, your comments (and the comments of others) were rude because you made said assumptions. Those assumptions cast the OP in a pretty negative light - Bad pet owner, disrespectful to parents, free-loader, ungrateful. And as it turns out, OP is none of these things. They were just having a really stressful moment, as most human people with emotions have. So yeah, it is pretty rude.

I really don't understand why you feel the need to focus so heavily on OPs age and life experience... this is a snake forum... not a life coaching site. And it is extremely rude to tell someone they don't have enough life experience or that they have a lot of learning to do in life when you don't know this person. I don't know this person. But I do know some pretty grown up 23-year-olds that would find this generalization pretty offensive.

Call me old fashioned, but when a member calls their parent a "total idiot" and "an old bat" (especially when it's in their first two posts), I don't find that the least bit respectful regardless of the circumstance and I find it hard to overlook those words. I don't judge people based on their age, but I sure as heck will judge them based on their actions. Actions can change, though, and I'm glad to read about the happy ending. It just took a long and winding road to get there in the course of this thread!

This post reminds me of the job interview question, "Have you ever had difficulty working with a supervisor or manager?" When that question is asked, they're not really asking about your past supervisors - they're asking about you. They want to know how you are to work with. The answer you choose to give them will tell them more about you than about your previous boss. So, if you launch into a story about how your old boss yelled at everyone, or was unreasonable in his or her demands, or was a bad manager, the only message they will get is that you bad mouth people. If you talk about how your boss accused you of not working hard enough when you clearly did, they'll assume that you're someone who doesn't work hard. If you mention a boss who played favorites, they'll think you're a difficult person to work with. So, you have to be very careful about answering this question - even if you had legitimate complaints about your old boss. And, lots of bosses earn every one of those complaints. You can't say so. It's never a good idea to bad mouth your former boss for any reason. Keep in mind that any story you do tell should be the Disney story - positive and with a happy ending.

If the OP's question would have been phrased as if it was the situation, not the person, that was difficult, this thread would have been very different. In the end, the OP took proactive steps to resolve it in a mature fashion and the end result was a productive one. Hooray.

Having said all of that, that portion of this thread has run its course. I'm sure we all learned a thing or two from each other which, ultimately, is the goal of this forum. Now, if we could learn a few more things about snakes and less about the OP's personal life in this thread going forward, that would be great. Thanks!