Convince my parents

So I've got one ball python now and he is doing so so so so perfect. My mom knows I take great care of him. She also knows I'm obsessed with snakes and she thinks it's wierd. It's hard to explain to her why I want another snake...preferably a hog island boa. So me and her are going to an expo august 27th and I'm pretty much certain I want a hog island boa, every time I say it to her she says like...."yeah right your acting like the rain man". I don't know what that means.plz help I need a way to tell her I want another snake without her getting mad. Just a pet not a breeder

be persistent. sometimes when people see how important something is to you, they sometimes have a change of heart. lots of people think snakekeeping is weird, i dont think thats going to change anytime soon. but if it is something you are really into, if you are persistent enough youll probably have success. good luck.

She makes me so mad because she won't give me an answer she just says " because I said you cant"

Tell them what makes you want a Hog island boa so bad... Are you fascinated by its pattern/ colors? Do you want a snake larger than a ball python, but not quite as large as a mainland boa constrictor? Maybe you like the more active personality that boas tend to show when compared to ball pythons? Impress your parents with knowledge about the species, and what about that species gets you so excited, and perhaps they will change their minds after all.

Like Mike said, it increases your odds to show you know EVERYTHING there is to know about the animal you want your parents to let you keep. Other than that your best help comes from them seeing how well you take care of your current pets, showing responsibility tends to pay off in the long run. Also, if you don't get the snake you want right away don't throw a hissy fit at your folks, they could see it as a lack of maturity and confirmation that they made the right choice. Play it cool and even if you don't get the snake you want at this show, there's always the future and other expos. Good luck!

I'm 26 years old and my parents still give me a weird look when I tell them I'm getting a new snake. Few people would bat an eye if you mentioned adding a new fish to your aquarium, maybe a good route would be to show her that having more than one reptile isn't abnormal, and that 'collecting' snakes, per say, isn't as crazy as she may think it to be.

Rain Man was a movie about a guy who discovers his long lost autistic brother is a math savant, and plans to take advantage of his abilities for gambling purposes. He comes to realize that he actually cares about his brother, and takes care of him, rather than exploiting him. The title comes from the fact that the guy's only memory of his brother was from early childhood, when he couldn't pronounce his autistic brother Raymond's name, so called him 'Rain Man'.

So, your mother is saying you sound like you're autistic, which isn't very nice. She most likely means that you sound obsessive and recite facts frequently, which means you are a reptile geek like the rest of us here. You might try asking her if she would rather you were reciting sports statistics, and ask her if she has anything SHE really loves to do and talk about. (Most folks have a hobby that they are passionate about, after all).

In your place, I would remind her that there are worse things to be passionately interested in, after all.

Find out why she won't let you have it and then try to purswade her off her idea and on to yours. Hope you get it!!!:snake:

How old are you? Who pays for the animal? What happens to them if/when you go to college? Just to add another perspective, she may just not want the added responsibility of another animal herself. Her roof, her rules. When you move out, you can get whatever you want. I had to wait until I moved out to get my snakes, and it worked out fine in the end.

I am sorry, but if you live under your parents roof I do not care if your 40 and they say no that is the answer. It is their home, they pay the bills! Be happy with one and when you move out get more.

I pay for everything with the snake I have now

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Originally Posted by brikwall96

I pay for everything with the snake I have now

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That is well and fine but it is still you living under your parents' roof. So basically they have the say in what you can and cannot have. Just saying.

Here's something to consider--if you start setting aside all of the money you would use for the boa (cost of cage, animal, food, bedding, etc), and keep setting that aside, then when you move out, you not only will be able to get the boa, you'll probably be able to get 2 of them. Or an older animal. Or a morph.

I agree, though--unfortunately, the owner of the building gets to dictate what's allowed in the building. No one's saying you shouldn't try to convince her, but it is a matter of doing something for her, because she has no obligation to say yes, and you don't have an actual right to it.

Perhaps instead of asking her to allow you to get the boa...you should ask her what it would take for her to allow you to get the boa?

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Originally Posted by ballpythonluvr

That is well and fine but it is still you living under your parents' roof. So basically they have the say in what you can and cannot have. Just saying.

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Oy, seriously? Are we living in a Roman State via Ceasar's rule? This is America,
and in America we manipulate people to get what we want. Look, every kid knows what arguments and behaviors work best on their parents. If you don't, then figure it out. You got one snake, which is getting your foot in the door. Now your mom is clearly entertaining the idea, so go with that. But, what can you do to reinforce her entertainment at the idea of another snake?
Honestly, start keeping them in the dark about snake care. The more they know about how much you need to do for one snake, they will multiply that by 2 and be less ignorant but more hesitant.
Don't try to warm your parents onto your snake by taking it out in front of them. If they want to see your snake, they will ask.
Don't nag them. They know you want one.
And then again, there is also the old saying that "Apologizing is easy than asking for permission."

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Originally Posted by nachash

And then again, there is also the old saying that "Apologizing is easy than asking for permission."

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I am sorry, and I do not wnat to fight, but this is what is wrong with youth today. To many allow and encourage youth to go against their parents and do what they want. Yes my son has a snake, yes he wants another one, but this is my home and my rules. Maybe one day he will get another, but when I say no I mean it. If he did break my rules there would be a punshiment, that would be getting rid of the snake if that is what the broken rule was. Why are jails so full?? Because there are people who think it is their right to do as they please. Learn respect and follow the rules that are set.

I currently have the same problem. I'm almost 20 years old but since I still live with my mom and pop I still can't Have a larger snake. My.mom is the main issue as well. She has a phobia of large snakes And since she hears the word python She is paranoid of it escaping And killing her in her sleep. She allowed me a Baby garter I got from an expo because it was small. Now That he has put on a few inches she constantly nags about How big it is and tells me that one day I may come home to it missing and my dog with a new toy. We have had our share of arguments over the subject but I Have given up. I'm moving out next summer and my girlfriend who whole heartedly supports my hobby said I can have a snake room (yes she is That cool. :) ) I don't really want to wait but I Have to. Its her house and her rules sure I pay her rent....but she is Still my "landlord". I currently have a seperate savings account for snake funds. By the time I move out ill have money for a few morphs....more than I would Have now. So Just be patient. If you keep baggering her she will probably be more not up for the idea like my mom was.


Just my $.02

I love that people think youth is SUDDENLY rebellious. Anyone can run their house like they want to, sure. But as much as you want your rules kept is generally how much kids will strive to break them.
My dad's as Machiavellian as any parent, a former JAG officer with an authoritarian streak. His will can be bent like any other.
Your snake gets wrapped around a metal pipe. Do you try to rip it off? No, you slowly pull it around. Same as your parents.
Oh sure,
"when I put my foot down I mean it. I never compromise when I say no!"
please..., those kinds of parents are the easiest to trick. All you need to do is humor their need for control.

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Originally Posted by WingedWolfPsion

She most likely means that you sound obsessive and recite facts frequently, which means you are a reptile geek like the rest of us here.

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:D this is sad but true hahaha

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Originally Posted by tsy72001

I am sorry, but if you live under your parents roof I do not care if your 40 and they say no that is the answer. It is their home, they pay the bills! Be happy with one and when you move out get more.

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i would have to disagree.. everyone probably did something similar at some point in their childhood where they were furious at their parents.. they just need to realize if its not going to hurt anything then whats the big deal? AND if your 40 and living in your parents house (which there is nothing wrong with really) there is no way you shouldnt have some say in the rules around the house lol i love my parents and all but it doesnt matter who you are, you have to give respect to get respect.. maybe its just my generation but oh well..

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Originally Posted by nachash

I love that people think youth is SUDDENLY rebellious. Anyone can run their house like they want to, sure. But as much as you want your rules kept is generally how much kids will strive to break them.
My dad's as Machiavellian as any parent, a former JAG officer with an authoritarian streak. His will can be bent like any other.
Your snake gets wrapped around a metal pipe. Do you try to rip it off? No, you slowly pull it around. Same as your parents.
Oh sure,
"when I put my foot down I mean it. I never compromise when I say no!"
please..., those kinds of parents are the easiest to trick. All you need to do is humor their need for control.

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i agree haha my dad is a navy master chief and has always been stern (understatement) but at the same time i wouldnt have it any other way cause i like how ive turned out but now that i look back on it as long as you make stern parents think they have control.. its like... do what you want all day everyday haha

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Originally Posted by tsy72001

be happy with one and when you move out get more.

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please sir, may i have another?

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Originally Posted by tsy72001

I am sorry, and I do not wnat to fight, but this is what is wrong with youth today. To many allow and encourage youth to go against their parents and do what they want. Yes my son has a snake, yes he wants another one, but this is my home and my rules. Maybe one day he will get another, but when I say no I mean it. If he did break my rules there would be a punshiment, that would be getting rid of the snake if that is what the broken rule was. Why are jails so full?? Because there are people who think it is their right to do as they please. Learn respect and follow the rules that are set.

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I completely agree with this. Manipulation is not the way to go here. I have two daughters myself and if they wanted a snake, they would have to ask me and show me that they really want this and show me that they can be responsible.

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Originally Posted by tsy72001

I am sorry, and I do not wnat to fight, but this is what is wrong with youth today. To many allow and encourage youth to go against their parents and do what they want. Yes my son has a snake, yes he wants another one, but this is my home and my rules. Maybe one day he will get another, but when I say no I mean it. If he did break my rules there would be a punshiment, that would be getting rid of the snake if that is what the broken rule was. Why are jails so full?? Because there are people who think it is their right to do as they please. Learn respect and follow the rules that are set.

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haha im sorry i cant help but laugh at that.. not trying to be rude but its parents like that that have the sneakiest children. the more you rule with an iron fist the more your kids are going to find ways to sneak around it. im in my 20s now and my parents tried that for a while when i was 12-16ish then when they realized it was a lot easier to be the cool parents we got along so much better. as long as we let them know what we were doing and where we were gonna be etc they didnt care all that much. we even started hanging out at the house soo much more haha so point of the story.. if your gonna be a iron fist parent then your gonna get hurt when your kids rebel and leave as soon as they can get a foot out the door and push you away as fast as they can.. but if you want to be a little slack and see it from your kids point of view and take interest in it with them.. then your going to have a lot better relationship at the end of the day..

That is NOT true. My parents where very strict and I NEVER got in trouble or did what they did not want me too. Was I perfect, NO. My kids are not perfect, but they know the rules and follow them. Will they test me, yes I am sure they will. What I was saying is do not encourage children to break rules. I am a teacher and students that break rules get into trouble, so if you break rules at home you get into trouble, if you break rules in the adult world, you get into trouble.

And my boys and I do almost everything together. They are with me or my dad at all times. We ride together and have the same hobbies. yes they have friends, but guess what their friends like to do things with us. Kids strive for structure and boundries.

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Originally Posted by zach_24_90

haha im sorry i cant help but laugh at that.. not trying to be rude but its parents like that that have the sneakiest children. the more you rule with an iron fist the more your kids are going to find ways to sneak around it...

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YUP...
Now, I'm not going to lie, I am one of those sneaky kids grown up. Sigh, parents shudder at the idea of their kids manipulating them, when good parenting is entirely manipulation. If some end up having kids unable to play them as parents, they'll have dull kids.
Look dude, you see one group of people (parents) saying what they'd say to their own kids. You're not looking for advice from them as your own parents. The other group is people telling you to bide your time. I don't disagree, but only bide your time if you can't push things along.
The third is the portion saying to do what you want, but in a smart way.

"Come to dark side, let your hate flow through you"