Parents

You're right, it's not the end of the world. It is just very frustrating.

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Originally Posted by lovepig78

Unless OP can prove he pays for the electric bill, since his snakes use them, he pays for the water he showers with, pays for the internet he uses to make thread posts, pays for the space he lives in, and pays for the gas on his vehicles......

Then and only then will OP not owe his parents anything....


And going to youth group doesn't mean you are going to get brainwashed... OP seems to know what he believes in...

im 1000% sure OP wouldn't get brainwashed

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Ok cool, so people who pay for other peoples electric, water, internet, and rent bills (oh and gas expenses) get the ability to seize property from the receiver of these benefits if said receiver does not do as the they are told. Oh and the receiver has to respect these donators for the rest of his life even though he did not ever even choose this contract, he just happens to be stuck in it because of biology.
Not to mention that these donators went through all the processes of taking on the responsibility of the OP by going through the magical art of copulation. :rolleye2:

And what exactly does the OP "owe" to these people? Money? Respect? Time? Please clarify.

It's kind of like paying your bills. If you don't make the payments they come take your car. Once he is out on his own he can respect their ideals or not and he can respect them or not. But as so many have already said as long as he is living in their house there are rules to follow. Once he is on his own he can do whatever he wants as long as he conforms to society's rules and laws.

There will always be rules to follow no matter where you are it's time to learn that now.

As for comparing home to a prison, you got to be kidding.

On rules - yes, 'their house their rules'...but once rules cross That Line, it turns into a Tyranny situation. Rules should not be so concrete that compromises can't be reached, especially with an older teen.

On 'prison' - or rather the quote "As for comparing home to a prison, you got to be kidding." Why do you have to be kidding?? Home can indeed be a prison if that's how you're treated. If your parents act more like wardens, controlling every aspect of your life, then home is in fact a prison. I know someone whose life was like that. His parents repressed him in every way. Everything had to be their way or nothing. No compromise, no 'let's talk about this'. He was a prisoner in his own home...and the scariest part is that they never noticed what they were doing. They still don't see it to this day, and never will. He got out of there when he finally realized he had nothing left to lose - they'd taken it all away. And let me tell you...I saw all this. I'm VERY glad he chose to get the heck out of there... it allowed him to actually start living.
Sorry...that's a touchy subject for me...

Anyway, when parents refuse to compromise even when the 'child' tries to have a serious discussion on the topic, that's when respect no longer applies. Bottom line - respect is EARNED. By either party, parents or offspring.
If I were in this situation, I would start looking into options for getting another place to live once I was 18. :)

Well I still believe as I said as long as you live in their home you abide by their rules. Legally he is still considered a "child" and therefore his parents are responsible for him. Now I agree with you that once he is old enough to go out on his own then that's what he should do if he is not happy there.

I know this is not the popular stance here on this thread but the "child" should not be the one making the rules around the house. Yes some parents can be too strict but they seem to let him do pretty much what he wants in others venues. Don't you think he should comprise some as well? I don't know him or his parents and I don't know how things are around his house but he seems to have it pretty good from what he has said so far.

I too have known people that grew up in extremely strict homes and most of these people went on to become good successful people when they left home.

As for respect, I'm a lot older than you probably and we were always taught to respect our parents after all they do everything for you until you are grown and leave home. You don't think they have earned your respect after all that?

Don't mean to rant just my two cents worth.

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Originally Posted by Roadtrash

It's kind of like paying your bills. If you don't make the payments they come take your car. Once he is out on his own he can respect their ideals or not and he can respect them or not. But as so many have already said as long as he is living in their house there are rules to follow. Once he is on his own he can do whatever he wants as long as he conforms to society's rules and laws.

There will always be rules to follow no matter where you are it's time to learn that now.

As for comparing home to a prison, you got to be kidding.

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Paying your bills is a voluntary transaction between two independant parties where there is contract law which states that property can be taken if the debt is not paid. Clearly being born into a family is not a voluntary transaction, a child has no say whatsoever where he is born or what rules he has to be subject to. I do agree that if he wants to keep the animals he has to conform to his parents rules but this is a situation of force and therefore should not invoke any kind of respect. They are incapable of using logic and empirical evidence to change the OP's mind so they are using force to attempt to bully him into obeying their ideals.

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Originally Posted by Roadtrash

Well I still believe as I said as long as you live in their home you abide by their rules. Legally he is still considered a "child" and therefore his parents are responsible for him. Now I agree with you that once he is old enough to go out on his own then that's what he should do if he is not happy there.

I know this is not the popular stance here on this thread but the "child" should not be the one making the rules around the house. Yes some parents can be too strict but they seem to let him do pretty much what he wants in others venues. Don't you think he should comprise some as well? I don't know him or his parents and I don't know how things are around his house but he seems to have it pretty good from what he has said so far.

I too have known people that grew up in extremely strict homes and most of these people went on to become good successful people when they left home.

As for respect, I'm a lot older than you probably and we were always taught to respect our parents after all they do everything for you until you are grown and leave home. You don't think they have earned your respect after all that?

Don't mean to rant just my two cents worth.

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Sure, so long as he lives in their home he "has to" abide by their rules but that is a very different statement than he "should" abide by their rules. The choice is up to him, if he wants to keep the animals, he has to submit. If he wants to not go to church then he loses the animals. In the same way that if someone is robbing me, I can choose to keep my life by giving them what they want but it is not a very moral situation.

What rules is the OP making? He is simply stateing a personal preference "I would like to keep snakes and ride bikes without being forced to go to church." In a rational household this would be no problem.

Yeah and only 1/3 of smokers die from lung cancer but this doesnt mean they should smoke. The remaining folks might be able to walk but maybe they could be marathon runners if they never smoked.

Yeah, you were "taught", you weren't "reasoned" into that belief that you have to respect them, they "told" you to and I'd bet they reinforced it in a myriad of ways.

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Originally Posted by Argentra

On rules - yes, 'their house their rules'...but once rules cross That Line, it turns into a Tyranny situation. Rules should not be so concrete that compromises can't be reached, especially with an older teen.

Anyway, when parents refuse to compromise even when the 'child' tries to have a serious discussion on the topic, that's when respect no longer applies. Bottom line - respect is EARNED. By either party, parents or offspring.
If I were in this situation, I would start looking into options for getting another place to live once I was 18. :)

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Teens who think rules are flexiable are learning what when it comes to real life? Not all rules can or need to be flexiable. If rules for kids especially older teens aren't concrete how can you expect them to respect or even concider Laws that keep me and my family safe?

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Originally Posted by Freakie_frog

Teens who think rules are flexiable are learning what when it comes to real life? Not all rules can or need to be flexiable. If rules for kids especially older teens aren't concrete how can you expect them to respect or even concider Laws that keep me and my family safe?

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What laws would that be that keep you and your family safe?

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Originally Posted by OctagonGecko729

What laws would that be that keep you and your family safe?

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how about speed limits, drinking and driving, texting and driving, shoplifting, legal gun ownership, drug use, passing a stopped school bus? just to name a few.. how many teens are killed every year because of texting and driving? or people killed by morons who think drinking and driving is a flexable rule, our state had a mother of two killed by two shoplifters fleeing the scene, how many parents have to bury their children because someone thought 25 in a neighborhood is flexable? ect ect ect..If you don't get your kids to follow the little rules because you're flexable what makes you think someone who they don't know can get them to follow the big ones.