I was the same way when I got my little one. I'd owned a large female but not anything small, and for some reason it made me more nervous than the large one.

Here's a trick that helped me. When I first got the snake, I put an article of my clothing in the tub with her. I just used an old shirt that I never really wore anymore. It helped her get used to my scent.

If she is in feeding mode when I go to pick her up, I'll sometimes touch her nose with a t-shirt. It snaps her out of it, and she instantly goes back to her usual self. If she really REALLY doesn't want to be picked up, she'll hiss at me. If I push the matter, she'll ball up. Striking is always her last resort. She's only ever struck at me once, and that was a feeding day after a long shed.