Such a sad story. But you're right to think of it as a learning experience. It was a hard thing to have to do but you'll be a wiser and stronger person because of it. I'm a believer that everything happens for a reason. Maybe the baby needed to go now because it would have had very bad problems later on in life. Thinking things like that always make me feel better because I don't feel that it was a senseless death/loss anymore. I also think that maybe now, you'll love the others in the clutch that tiny bit more, and appreciate them all the more as well. And that's a good thing in itself.