Differences Between Canada and the USA

[frankykeno]

Well just my personal observations anyways.....

- you have way too many types of gravy...gravy should be brown and served on the Sunday roast....period

- guns are for hunting and cops not pickup trucks

- school overcrowding in Canada means it's not planting or harvesting season

- most people in Canada have never seen an eskimo or a polar bear and no we have never met your third cousin John who moved to Saskatchewan

- we can pronounce Saskatchewan

- we make better beer

- you make better cars

- we talk slower and "eh" is the proper way to end each and every sentence

- discussing childbirth with the girl in line at Becker's is quite normal, Canadians like to share and remember we talk slow so be patient

- we make great hockey players, you know how to buy them

- the only time Canadians are in a hurry is if Crappy Trash is about to close (if you are from Canada you know what Crappy Trash is)

- it's socially acceptable to do a complete engine overhaul in the parking lot of Crappy Trash....crowds will form and some guy named Jim will do your timing

- smart Canadian women do not give birth during hockey season, if they accidentally go into labor during the playoffs they don't expect their husband to show up

- nobody in Canada is quite sure what grits are and we don't really want to know

- you haven't lived until you've eaten poutine! (Americans tend to think this is a rude word?)

- you gave us WalMart

- most Canadians don't speak french other than the curse words (we also mumble through the french part of our national anthem)

- you have boring money....it's all green and none of it is referred to in fun terms like the looney and the twoney

- the proper response to a standard Canadian greeting is this..."how ya doin eh? good eh and yerself?" (please note that "eh" can be used not only at the end but also in the middle of a sentence...oh and it's also a form of punctuation depending on the tone and emphasis you give it )

- everyone who lives "out west" is a hippy, everyone who lives "down east" is a fisherman or a Newf

- Newf's make the best moonshine...it's called "screech"...drink it at your own peril (don't say I didn't warn ya!)

- people from Quebec will look down on you if you can't speak french, but they are french and therefore cannot help themselves

- people from Quebec are not actually speaking french (they speak le français québécois but are too snotty to admit it)

- our Acadians are sort of like your Cajuns...they make the best music and the best food

- socialized medicine rocks!

- you had a President that almost got impeached for immoral acts in his office, we had a Prime Minister that nobody wanted to sleep with

- your Presidents have many bodyguards, our Prime Ministers have been known to punch a reporter or two that got in the way or flash them a rude hand gesture....Canadians consider this an asset in a leader

- referring to the "rack" you have in Canada is not a reference to your wife's build, it's the antlers on your wall from last year's buck

- dead animals are considered a form of home decor

- we think pot is legal in Canada, they keep changing the laws though and let's be honest...the poor pot smokers just can't keep up!

- at the border the US guards will strip search you, demand documentation and glare menacingly at your grandma....the Canadian guards will simply say "have a nice trip eh?" (or you might stop for a lovely discussion of someone's recent childbirth experience)

- some Canadian provinces still have Grade 13 in high school, don't worry we don't understand why either

- milk comes in bags, three bags come in a bigger bag....if a Canadian asks you to grab a bag of milk it can mean two things....#1 if you are home it means get a single bag out of the fridge cuz the jug is empty, #2 if you are walking out of the house it means stop at Becker's and grab a bag of milk cuz we are out of milk (confused yet?)

- you have Vitamin D milk, we have Homogenized milk...it is commonly referred to as "homo milk" (stop laughing!!!)

- sausage gravy scares Canadians...remember gravy is brown and you get it on Sunday with the roast beef....white lumpy stuff is unnatural!

- we have a Queen, it's a lady over in England, not a guy wearing his mom's dress

- we don't have African-Canadians or Irish-Canadians, if you were born in Canada, you are a Canadian, if you weren't you're not...oh other than the French-Canadians but being french they can't help being a bit irritating that way

- Indians in Canada are from India, we have First Nations people or Aboriginal People...do not call them Indians please they don't appreciate it and heck they aren't from India!

- we like our clean water so please keep buying it, we need the cash to build more hockey rinks

- Toronto, Ontario is NOT the capital of Canada

- we don't have rednecks, we have "hicks"

- we aren't sure why you folks are in such an all fired hurry to get places, how will you have time to discuss life while standing in a bank line this way?

- there's a whole bunch of Canada you can't drive to (no roads) but that's okay...most of us didn't want to go there anyways

and the last and most important thing....

WE DO NOT HAVE ACCENTS...YOU DO! (well okay the Newfs do have accents and nobody understands what they say but they make good booze!)

[Laooda]

Hahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Good stuff!!!!

[ZEKESMOM]

LOL gotta love it

[Uncle Festae]

Ha ha, good one Jo

Don't forget this one...

In Canada 4/20 is a National holiday, not just another day in April

[recycling goddess]

the reason babies are not born during the playoffs is simple... 9 months AFTER the playoffs is not another playoff

[tmlowe5704]

Ha ha, good one Jo

Don't forget this one...

In Canada 4/20 is a National holiday, not just another day in April

It is not just another day in April here.

[Stewart_Reptiles]

people from Quebec will look down on you if you can't speak french, but they are french and therefore cannot help themselves

This is so true.

[recycling goddess]

AND many of them refuse to speak english LOL

[Stewart_Reptiles]

AND many of them refuse to speak english LOL

True even if they can they won't, it's just the French thing, being rude as usual :eek:

[Uncle Festae]

AND many of them refuse to speak english LOL

pffft, I wish my wife would refuse to speak english Would make the day go by so much quicker LOL

I loved it when her parents stayed with us...All french, all the time...couldn't understand a word