Wife says no....

[bg1906]

I was in a similar boat. I grew up with parents that never would let me have a snake in the house. I got the typical, when you own your own home you can do what you will. So now that I do own a home, I had to then go through it with my wife. Her response is based on fear. I let my wife know that I had wanted a BP since a young boy and that now that I had the opportunity I was going to do it. She wasn't thrilled but its good to remind the wife that marriage is a give/take relationship (compromise). What I did then was begin to slowly introduce all my research into BPs to my wife. I bought the book, The Ball Python Manual, and I let her know about the things that make BPs so popular (manageable size, temperment, etc). I then also purchased VPI's, All About Ball Pythons (2 part VHS tapes) and asked her to have an open mind and at least watch them with me. Hearing Dave and Tracy Barker talk about BPs and her seeing first hand a large BP on the video and seeing the snakes kind nature, made her more accepting. But she also had concerns. Her next concerns were food items (rats and mice), she didn't want to have live rats or mice in our home that could possibly say escape. So after watching the videos she become aware of f/t. Next she didn't want frozen rats in our fridge/freezer, so I assured her that I'd get stand alone freezer and keep it in the garage (compromise). Her final worry was hearing that snakes are escape artists and she was worried the snake would get out. So after meeting Adam here and becoming aware of companies such as Animal Plastics, Vision, etc., I learned that their were companies that made enclosures strictly for securely housing reptiles. I then showed her the cages by Animal Plastics and the fact that they had locks. Once she saw that we made another compromise. That was that if I got the cage, made sure they were no means of escape, and made sure I kept it locked, she'd be willing. Lastly, I took her to a reptile show so she could see snakes up close first hand in a good environment. That was a positive experience as well. Next, I started by first buying everything I needed including the cage BEFORE I got the snake. I then started working on fine tuning my husbandry needs by researching, asking a ton of questions here, and also setting up my environment before the snake arrived. Once the snake arrived, everything I had promised my wife I would do, I had done. That date was Sept. 22, 2005. So far, so good. She even came and held the snake the other day (w/ gloves of course)! So I'd count this as a victory! Just stay persistent and do what you can to ease her fear. The best weapon against fear/ignorance (in the true sense of the word, not offensive) is knowledge and education. It worked for me!

Hope that helps.