Handling or "taming" a new snake is quite low on my priority list. When I first bring home a new snake (or accept it, if delivered), I'll check it over carefully & gently before putting it in it's home to rest without being disturbed & with plenty of privacy. I can & have probed snakes for gender, but I would never do it upon arrival- that's excessively stressful in my opinion, & I put the health & welfare of the animal first. If it turns out to be the "wrong gender" that was sold to me, I'll work it out later with the seller- initially, I'll take their word for it. If it's a snake that I'm sure I'll never breed, I may never bother with gender anyway. Some I can tell by less invasive methods (appearance) anyway.
Keep in mind that their immune system is not likely as good as ours, & stress negatively affects the functioning even for humans- now remember how confusing & stressful a new home is for a snake. Snakes stay alive by following their instincts...they learn their way around to stay safe from weather & predators. It's not just your unfamiliar home itself but how a snake may have gotten to you: was it shipped? did it travel by car or truck? All this affects your snakes, & IMO, makes it that much more important to give them time to settle in.
Eating is "job #1". I want a snake to be eating at normal intervals for at least 3 meals before I do any handling, with no refusals for anything other than being in shed. You have plenty of time to get acquainted, but if you stress a snake into refusing to eat, you may also end up with a sick snake that just goes downhill. Put their needs first & you'll have a better experience.
Handling can interfere with a snake's instincts to feed- keep in mind that anything that picks up a snake in the wild is normally a predator about to eat them. If a creature that was 100+ times your size scooped you up, would you be thinking about having lunch? I doubt it.Until proven otherwise with gradual experience, snakes figure us for being predators- try to put yourself in their place.
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