I know how you feel- you've been a thorough & conscientious owner, & it's just "not fair", & with your first snake even. This is not a typical situation or there wouldn't be so many of us keeping snakes- it's really rotten luck. I really don't think it's anything that you did (though do keep Lysol away so that reptiles aren't breathing it). We're not seeing your snake, but your descriptions are pretty complete- & I'd have to agree it doesn't look too good, but I'll hope for you & your boa anyway. I hope you get the help you need from the vet(s). And know that we're here for you too.