Ball pythons are notorious for being picky eaters. If she was fed live and then pre killed rodents and has now been switched to f/t (frozen thawed) that may be why she is being picky.
How are you heating them up? You want to make sure you are warming them up past room temperature and to a temp similar to their body temperature when they are alive. Make sure you don't heat them up so much that their insides start to cook. It may turn her off of them and can also cause their skin to soften and bellies to explode.
Also if she was previously being fed rats she may not take mice. Some snakes will not go back to mice once they try rats... apperantly they taste better lol.
I personally feed in cage because I don't like having to handle and disturb them so soon after eating. It can stress them out and sometimes even make them regurgitate their meal. Some people feel that feeding in cage can cause cage aggressiveness but I have never had an issue with it (just make sure they don't accidentally swallow any of their substrate while eating).
A good way to tell what size of rodent to be feeding is to go off of the largest part of their body. Snakes can eat 1.5x their largest girth. I typically go for meals the same size or slightly larger than their biggest part. From the looks of her in the picture she should be able to small rats or rat pups if those are too big.
There are some risks associated with feeding live which is why it is better to pre-kill the rodent before offering. Mice are typically pretty dumb and docile and won't fight back but rats can take pretty large chunks out of your snake and cause injury. If you do choose to feed live make sure you supervise until the rodent has passed out and never leave them running around in there overnight. You also may have trouble switching her back to f/t if she starts eating live, and you'll be faced with this same issue later.
In regards to getting her to start eating, you are on the right track. Feeding her at nighttime when she is most active and wiggling the prey infront of her nose with tongs should do the trick eventally. You can try rustling the rat around in some of the clutter, sometimes it tricks them into thinking the prey is running around. Just make sure the rodent is warm enough and dab them with a paper towel if they are wet.
Do not feel bad! You are not a bad owner and there is no reason to feel guilty. Lots of people have issues getting new additions to start eating regularly. You sound like you've got her viv set up nicely, my only advice there would be to get a hygrometer so you can keep track of the humidity in the tank (you want it around 50-60%).
Good luck and![]()