I am a brand new owner and would love some opinions about balancing stress and socializing.

I've had her since the begining of the month, when I first got her I gave her several days of being left totally alone to settle in, and then attempted to feed her, she showed zero interest. I didn't know when she was fed last so I wasn't worried. I handled her a couple times before trying to feed her again but she only tried striking me or the mouse and didn't touch it when I left her alone with it for a few hours. Since she was too stressed to eat I have not handled her at all other than to weigh her once (I didn't have a working scale when she arrived) and since then and she has successfully eaten twice (yey!)

However, the reason I had started handling her somewhat early is she is extremely defensive and I am very lucky her teeth aren't big enough to break skin. If I go into her tank to refill her water, clean, mist, etc she will repeatedly tag me, and will even try and get me through the glass (though only if I've been in the tank first). I've learned to put her hide over her but twice she's poked her head out to try and bluff. I do my best to move slowly and confidently but I have a very high startle reflex so when she strikes I usually jump. It's annoying and counterproductive but not something I'm ever likely to be able to control.

Since I've been trying to minimize stress and get out of her way as quickly as possible, I'm reinforcing that being defensive is effective and gets me to go away. While I can respect that she may not be a good socializer, I would very much like to get to a point where she's comfortable with me performing basic maintainance or at least that I can move her into a seperate bin while I do it (since I'm basically giant predator swooping in from above)

Currently my plan is to give her one more meal on Friday and if she eats wait two days, handle her briefly (10 minutes) on Monday and Wednesday and try feeding again on Friday. If she doesn't eat I'll leave her alone till she does and reevaluate from there.

I would love opinions on if this seems reasonable, or if I should wait longer, or honestly anything else you might have to offer. I suspect I erred by trying to handle her early rather than waiting till she ate, I'm sure she would appreciate if y'all could help me from making similar newbie mistakes.

Thanks and sorry this is so long, I didn't know which info was most relevant so I just gave it all.