Like the other posts above mine, I congratulate you on getting the job done, & you don't need to feel bad, IMO. It should get easier & until it does, it's better
to be a bit of a pest (or tease) than to feed live & get your snake injured. For me, it's not a hard choice at all. Different snakes react to different techniques-
if my rosy boa hesitates, I use tongs to nudge her neck with the f/t mouse & she'll usually whip around & grab it. My super-shy Korean rat snake usually goes
after a "dancing" f/t mouse from his hide, but sometimes I just have to leave it (at night) & it will be gone by morning. Most of my snakes are "rat" snakes, &
mostly they just easily take f/t from my tongs, but I've lived with BPs & many other kinds of snakes...it comes down to whatever works...No guilt!