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Thread: Wife dilemma...

  1. #1
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    Wife dilemma...

    Long post so sorry in advance...
    I am newlywed and have a snake rack (6*41qt) and the means to buy food/vet bills/misc. To acquire this rack I had to make a deal with my wife that I wouldn't purchase any more snakes until our baby is here. So that's the back story you need.
    I was on KSL (essentially craigslist) and there is someone who needs to get rid of his snake ASAP like tomorrow sort of thing. His ad says that if you pick the snake up, he's yours. SO with a cost of 0$ I asked my wife if this would be okay, she got insanely upset and said no.
    My question to you guys is what would you do? Would you roll over and say okay, or would you put up an argument. If you would argue, what would you say?

  2. #2
    Registered User dustin860's Avatar
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    Re: Wife dilemma...

    Happy wife happy life bro !


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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  4. #3
    Registered User Wicked's Avatar
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    I don't think that it's problematic that you're buying the snake, but that you're getting another snake to take care of when there's a baby on the way. Another snake means less time that the baby gets from you, which is why I think your wife is upset.

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  6. #4
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    If you have the means to support your pets, you have the means to buy one with money after the agreed-upon date. And if you have a baby human coming soon, it's not unreasonable to say no more additional animals until you see what life is like with the new family.

    Anyway, free snakes do come up from time to time. It's probably not the last opportunity for a freebie.

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  8. #5
    BPnet Veteran dkatz4's Avatar
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    Dude, i'm there too. i got my snake against my (pregnant) wife's wishes but got away with it b/c my son had suddenly became obsessed with snakes the month before and its just one little animal. Of course i want more snakes now, but i am waiting no matter what tempting herp comes along because...

    A: dont piss off your pregnant wife
    B: not only do babies take a lot of your time and attention, but also your energy. So even when you are not actively tending to the baby, previously simple tasks and routines (ie snake care) become arduous.
    C: DO NOT piss off your pregnant wife

    and D: In all seriousness, it has nothing to do with the food/vet budget but everything to do with your attention and consideration budget. She needs to know that your family means more to you than your hobby. Of course you and i know that a bargain snake is not going to actually tear you away from your wife and unborn child, but in principle, you committed your priority to her (them), and whether or not one more snake would really make any difference in your day to day life, breaking that commitment would send a very powerful and very hurtful message.

    There are plenty of snakes on the internet, but your family is the only one you've got.

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  10. #6
    Registered User Andylee11's Avatar
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    Consider her feelings and acknowledge them . Then do what you want to do .

  11. #7
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    Re: Wife dilemma...

    Quote Originally Posted by Jaust View Post
    Long post so sorry in advance...
    I am newlywed and have a snake rack (6*41qt) and the means to buy food/vet bills/misc. To acquire this rack I had to make a deal with my wife that I wouldn't purchase any more snakes until our baby is here. So that's the back story you need.
    I was on KSL (essentially craigslist) and there is someone who needs to get rid of his snake ASAP like tomorrow sort of thing. His ad says that if you pick the snake up, he's yours. SO with a cost of 0$ I asked my wife if this would be okay, she got insanely upset and said no.
    My question to you guys is what would you do? Would you roll over and say okay, or would you put up an argument. If you would argue, what would you say?
    I'm not a guy, so, take this FWIW.

    You made an agreement with her. "Purchase" is not the same as free, but assuming you came to a mutual understanding of something like "no more snakes" until baby arrives, I can understand why she said, no. This is not about you rolling over. Things will be much better for your new family in the long run, if you all can graciously extend consideration to each other.

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    BPnet Veteran piedlover79's Avatar
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    I'd be wary of a 'free' snake, it's probably worth less than free if it has any diseases that it could bring into your rack system and cost you a fortune. I assume you don't have a separate rack for quarantine.

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  15. #9
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    Instead of saying "Would you roll over and say okay, or would you put up an argument?" you should phrase it more honestly with "Would you honor the agreement you made, or decide to pick a fight over not getting your way?"

    You agreed and yes, it's free, but it's still a new snake and it will have expenses in food and bedding and such. It will take time to care for. Also, it's one free snake in a virtual sea of free animals that will continue to be available for many years, because there's always someone who gets a pet and changes their mind later on.

    What if you get the free snake and then find out it needs vet treatment? What if it's got parasites and you have to treat it AND treat all your equipment? How much will you need to spend on it? How much of a budget did you agree on for vet treatment for your pets?

    You have the rest of your lives to live together. Breaking an agreement just before you two have a baby arriving isn't a great idea. Getting pets just before a baby arrives isn't even a good idea.

    just my two cents.
    Theresa Baker
    No Legs and More
    Florida, USA
    "Stop being a wimpy monkey,; bare some teeth, steal some food and fling poo with the alphas. "

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  17. #10
    Registered User RoyalBlood20's Avatar
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    Wait 9 months and see if you can handle it lol babies are a whole nother ball game.

    ...........
    Reese - Normal BCI

    Luna - Hypo Boa (BCI)
    Snape - Normal BP
    Roxy - Normal BD
    Cosmo - Red Leatherback BD
    Dax - Normal Crested Gecko
    Fez - Gargoyle Gecko





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