Convincing her!

[midnightLeo]

If you became a small time breeder in the last 10 years or more and had a significant other who was not really into snakes how did you make it work. How did you talk her into it. Or in some cases (marriage) talk her into letting you spend the money to get started? Feedback, stories let me have it. Not something I'm trying to do in the near future but, in a few years down the line maybe when I retire. Thanks guys and gals.

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[enginee837]

My wife was adamantly against snakes, that is until both my daughter's fell in love with a couple bp's and wanted them for pets. Apparently she has no problem saying no to me but saying no to her babies is a whole different deal all together.

[Stewart_Reptiles]

Who says they have to be convinced or like it

One day I told my husband that one of my childhood dream was to own a snake, he told me he was scared of them and did not like them but if it was what made me happy than I should get one...............than I saw the first Pied and decided since I could not afford it (10K at the time) I would make my own and that's how I started breeding.

There is no allowing the other to spend money in our house not the way it works we are equals, their is money for bills, life necessities and savings and than there is money dedicated to leisure, hobby once all bills have been paid and essentials have been bought, some of that money is spend on things we do together and some is spent on what we each like to do.

Now fast forward almost 10 years later my hobby pays for itself and generate a profit, for the rest my husband went from being scared to not liking snakes to being more educated about them, and he is ok with me having a snake room and breeding snakes and rats. We do not share this hobby it's mine alone and it's fine with me.

Relationships how about compromise and supporting one another choices.

[wolfy-hound]

My husband and I were equal partners in life. We didn't "allow" each other to do things.

That said, my husband intensely disliked and feared snakes and he asked that I not keep snakes. He was okay with all the other things I did and kept and because I respected his feelings, I never got a snake while he was alive.

Now though, I have plenty. And monitors, tegu, etc. I don't have to worry about anyone saying "I forbid!" to anything I want to do or have, and I haven't worried about that since I moved into my own place as an adult.

If you share your home with someone, it is only respectful to sit down and discuss things. Just as they should take into account how much you want to have this hobby, you should be taking into account their feelings. If it's fear, find a way that it doesn't bother them... use a garage or a single room or even a different place(friend's house). If it's money, then figure up the budget and see where you can cut YOUR expenses, i.e. don't eat out or take your lunch to work, or stop smoking or don't go out drinking... etc.

Deal with it like a rational adult and there should be some way to work things out so that everyone is happy!

[aLittleLessButter]

My husband was and is still afraid of snakes. He was on deployment when I asked him if I could get my first one and even though he hates them, he is a sucker for making me happy so he said yes. Before the end of his deployment I had 5 and now I have 9. He doesn't care any more for them now but as long as they are in their own room and in a secure rack, he is fine with me indulging myself in my hobby. He did not "allow" me to have snakes. I believe anything in a relationship should be mutual so I asked him if it was ok. If he felt too uncomfortable with having them around I would have accepted it and moved on. In exchange for him being ok with it, I put absolutely no pressure on him to touch/hold or otherwise enjoy their company.

[DVirginiana]

My husband isn't terrified of my snakes, but he won't hold them or anything. I don't breed, but I've got a pretty large collection considering the size apartment we have. IMO it shouldn't matter whether or not the other person likes snakes; it's what you want to do. As long as their fear isn't so bad that they're going to have constant panic attacks just being in the same house and you're not spending so much you cause financial issues, there's no reason it can't work out just as well as someone having a painting studio or music room.

[bcr229]

I was the one who said "NO WAY" when my daughter said she wanted a king snake. The hubby said yes and I wouldn't have to deal with it.

Three years later and now most of the snakes in the house are mine...