Take your pinky finger, and your thumb, and wrap it around your snake to make an O shape about the same size as the belly of your snake. Then take a coin and see which size coin fits in your finger circle (Dime, Penny, Nickel, Quarter) Then take the coin and go to the nearest vending machine. Buy your favorite beverage (unless its pepsi, Pepsi doesn't work for this method. If you use Pepsi, then the estimated age of your snake will be WAY off) Now take your beverage back to your place and sit on your couch or chair or whatever you sit in to relax. Now, using the finger circle you made before, put your fingers around the cap and open the bottle (hopefully you still have your fingers in the circle position) Now take a drink from your beverage, you've earned. Now this is the most important part: Spit out your drink in a spray of shock and disbelief as you realize this is a hoax and I have no idea what I'm talking about.