Question for Female Herpers! (but guys are welcome, too.)

[bcr229]

My husband and I didn't get snakes until after we were married and our daughter wanted one. Now we're at the point where we trade off who gets the next one. He got an albino boa for his birthday last September, then I got 3 BP hatchlings from a breeder, and now he wants a Surinam boa next spring after seeing one at the Hamburg, PA expo recently.

[swolek]

I always ask my fiance but he always says "yes". I guess he knows what's good for him :p. But in all seriousness, he knows my snakes make me happy so he's cool with me adding to my collection. His only pet rule is no spiders.

[Dandelioness]

My SO would probably be pretty miffed if I got another dog - he isn't too fond of them - but he couldn't care much less about the snakes. They don't have a smell, they don't take a ton of space, they don't bother him. He doesn't like to handle them much but he's pretty into browsing classifieds with me and talking about hypothetical breeding plans... haha, I don't get it but whatever.

Not to say anyone's situation is "controlling", I'm only speaking for myself here, but we both come from extremely long and unhealthy previous relationships so we are both very much for "do whatever you want, it's your money, etc, as long as you're there for me when I need you it's 100% cool".

I feel like I could probably have a room of wall-to-wall snake racks before he would wonder if I'm in over my head.

[ApollosDragons]

I've been lucky enough to not have a cap on mine. If I ever ask about getting one his response is usually "as long as you think we have the money for it and you want it, go for it." I usually get a 'you know the answer' look if I ask any more.

In the past, with my parents they always said "no snakes" and my ex boyfriend said "no snakes" and often got huffy if I brought home another critter.

My only suggestion would be to sit down your significant other and try to explain what and why you want. Maybe try going over that you already have all the supplies you would need and how it would help future plans.

Good luck!

[Cupid]

My hubby doesnt put a limit on the snakes, as he loves them too. I'm actually the one making sure I dont get too many, as I take care of them. (I actually had to say no to a burmese because I simply dont want to clean massive snake poop!) The money we make is 'our' money, so as long as bills are paid, whoever has left over money gets to spend it as they like. We talk about each large purchase we make (if its more than $50) and if it involves an animal, we talk about it.

As long as we can afford the animals without cash and space being tight, we are pretty much open to new snakes, or an extra dog, etc..

[Marrissa]

Oh boy. My boyfriend and I would have major trouble if he tried to put a limit on my pets. At first he didn't like snakes. He still doesn't care for them but he takes an interest in what I'm saying, he asks to hold my big male sometimes, he'll hold them for me if I'm doing complete cage cleanings, he deals with the rats in our bedroom, he feeds them for me when I'm gone (he likes watching them eat too), etc. As time goes on and the more he is around them, the more he seems to like and get into the reptile world. We went to the East Bay Vivarium one weekend and we were both running around like kids in a candy shop. He was amazed by the burms and monitors and enjoyed the frog and lizard setups. He kept asking me if I was going to get anything in a tone like he wanted me to. I just didn't see anything I couldn't live without.

He has his hobbies and I have mine. If it makes him happy I don't want to tell him no and he feels the same. I might think it's a lot to spend several thousand on a guitar, but wouldn't think it's that much for a certain combo/gene I want. Acceptance of hobbies is what is needed. I wouldn't tell him no and he wouldn't tell me no on my hobbies either. He knows full well that when we get a house of our own that I'm getting a reptile room and that there will be no stopping me from new additions. Once I'm a nurse or have a good CNA job I'm not holding back as much.

When we first met my plan was to have a fish room and breed show quality bettas. That plan got scrapped when I got into BPs last year. I actually got him into fish because he loved my 75 gallon aquarium. He now has several 10 gallons set up and a 50 gal waiting for the day we get our own place (we rent an apartment). While I've branched away from fish, he's gotten more into them. As a whole my hobbies are more expensive than his. Nice morphs and horse upkeep and shows doesn't come cheap.

[ROACH]

Well I'm not married or dating at this moment so I figured Ill buy all I can before I do. BUT if my wife or girlfriend had a hobby I wouldn't stop them from getting what they wanted so I don't think they should stop me from getting what I wanted. As long as funds were there to get it and bills were paid!

[xFenrir]

The only reason my boyfriend tells me "no" when I put on the puppy eyes at a show or pet place is because we both moved back in with our parents for the time being. My mom has an "over my dead body" policy about snakes and my bf's mom is just tolerant of our boa (it took my bf, his dad and his brother outvoting her for her to agree to let us keep it at their house, and now she's comfortable with her as long as she doesn't have to be near her). It's just simply a matter of not having our own place; since we don't own the houses we're not going to impose animals that they don't want around. Once we have our own place again, I know probably one of the first things we'll do is go out and get a Beardie and maybe even another boa, lol.

That's one of the main reasons I haven't really been on BP.net; it's hard to look at all these people getting awesome new pets and I can't.

[Cendalla]

My hubby grew up in a house that had a goldfish and a cocker spaniel- that was it. He knows nothing about critters but he know in marrying me that animals were going to be a part of our household. He thinks my critters are neat and will keep me company when I clean (he really likes to help on feed days) but really doesn't have much do do with them (or my Ts).

We support each others hobbies. I have to keep myself in check. Do I really need another snake? Do I have enough food? Is it time to clean? Should I get an aggressive tarantula? I have to decide that because he doesn't want to step on my toes.

I have seven snakes, 30 tarantulas, two corgis, a cat, a beta, a horse, two birds, and a 4 year old child. If I had to rent this would be very difficult to pull off. We bought our house and now I don't have to worry about laws, room, moving, and all that jazz. My hubby is military and we have been pros at packing up and moving but it doesn't mean that we like it and it is really difficult to do that with the snakes. Especially keeping up with the constantly changing laws.

When I do bring home a new critter I try to not raise an eyebrow when the newest video game shows up in his collection. Even though he doesn't have much to do with my critters its kinda cute to see him show off one of my snakes or one of my more impressive Ts to a friend. His buddies are always scared of them and are really impressed that they are his wife's. Then they start complaining that their wives only collect shoes and what not.

Good luck

[M&NSnakeDen]

My hubby grew up in a house that had a goldfish and a cocker spaniel- that was it. He knows nothing about critters but he know in marrying me that animals were going to be a part of our household. He thinks my critters are neat and will keep me company when I clean (he really likes to help on feed days) but really doesn't have much do do with them (or my Ts).

We support each others hobbies. I have to keep myself in check. Do I really need another snake? Do I have enough food? Is it time to clean? Should I get an aggressive tarantula? I have to decide that because he doesn't want to step on my toes.

I have seven snakes, 30 tarantulas, two corgis, a cat, a beta, a horse, two birds, and a 4 year old child. If I had to rent this would be very difficult to pull off. We bought our house and now I don't have to worry about laws, room, moving, and all that jazz. My hubby is military and we have been pros at packing up and moving but it doesn't mean that we like it and it is really difficult to do that with the snakes. Especially keeping up with the constantly changing laws.

When I do bring home a new critter I try to not raise an eyebrow when the newest video game shows up in his collection. Even though he doesn't have much to do with my critters its kinda cute to see him show off one of my snakes or one of my more impressive Ts to a friend. His buddies are always scared of them and are really impressed that they are his wife's. Then they start complaining that their wives only collect shoes and what not.

Good luck

Haha we are in a similar situation. My man is in the forces. His gaming bugs the hell out of me sometimes, but I'm like "okay, Melissa. He deals with some of the snake bills so, I can't complain too much."

He's currently playing the new call of duty....that I actually bought for him. PROGRESS!! Lol

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