OK where the hell is everyone finding vermiculite and perlite sans Miracle-Gro for an egg tub? No one told me that they pulled it from all the big stores, and that Miracle-Gro is the only brand that is sold at Walmart, Home Depot, Lowe's Fred's and Tractor Supply Co.

Do I have to buy online? And if so where can I get it quickly?

Also, will cypress mulch work as an egg substrate? It seems to retain humidity extremely well, doesn't mold, and doesn't stay wet to the touch, at least not on the surface.

I need to know because I'm running out of time and I was not prepared for this. The sphagnum peat moss that I used last year has Miracle-Gro in it and I do not want to use it again.