Need to talk to someone, feeling hurt and angry over my daughter and sports.

[Dracoluna]

Well, I feel better having you guys.

A few clarifications:

She is 16, so yes she's a minor. Second, all three of her coaches and her trainer all know about her injuries, and they all still push her. The school is one of the worst in the state for sports, and they all see her as the ticket to the big time. It disgusts me.

She wants to run, she loves it. And I am fine with that. What I am not fine with is her getting hurt like she does. She has deep muscle scarring on her left leg from cross country, and who knows what tonight's xrays will turn up? I understand bumps and bruises, heck I do that in my own kitchen. But the reason she falls so much is because of her injured leg, and everyone but me just keeps pushing her to keep going.

I just feel like the only voice of reason, and I'm getting drowned out by everyone else telling her she could be one of the best if she just ignores the pain and tries harder.

Gale

I read the post and it's scary how close it is to the situation I faced in high school. I was good enough at soccer that as a freshman, was offered a starting spot on the varsity squad. This was my dream at the time as I'm uber competitive and LOVE soccer. The issue was I'd pushed myself in the private league I'd played in for years and gotten to the point I had no cartilage left in either knee at the age of 14. Despite the doctors telling me I couldn't run/play, I ignored it and pushed myself to train. My mom put a stop to it with a call to the school stating I was not allowed to play. I'm pretty sure I cried and called her every name in the book. For about 4 years, I held it against her and was a sulky teenager. Now at 30, I've not had knee surgery despite the doctors telling me I shouldn't be able to walk though I do have to wear the lovely braces with hinges on them some days. Looking back, despite being angry with her, I'm glad my mom made that decision. Had I played, there is a very good chance I'd have knees that weren't my own or worse, forced to wear braces/wheelchair-bound. Because of what she did along with diligent physical therapy, I can walk and even jog on soft surfaces. With the damage your daughter's doing to herself, you need to follow your instincts despite her love of it. As a teenager, you see the love and the passion for the sport which drowns out the reality of you still have the rest of your life to live. That's where parents have to come in and though I swore she'd shattered my dream back then, my mom saved me because I'd be miserable if I couldn't move and walk around normally. Hope that gives you some support and maybe sit down with the doctor and your husband to really look at what's happening. Maybe if he hears things like she'll be in a wheelchair at the age of 20, he'll come around to reality. A parent's job is to raise and protect their child even if that means protecting them from themselves.