Sometimes I hate him!

[PorcelainxDoll]

Sometimes I swear my husband is the biggest idiot in the world!
Mu husband decided to take 40$ of our rent money to go buy pot! Not to mention we have no money fpr gas, or groceries. I havent eaten in 3 day because I kbow that money is all we have! Both of our hours have been cut and we live paycheck to paycheck. He tells me not to stress, but I was stressed before this. Hes 31 years old and apparently would rather have pot then a home and groceries. Im so mad and upset and lost because I have no idea what to do.
Sorry I just had to rant some.

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[Mike41793]

And youre still with him because....?

[DooLittle]

That sucks, I'm sorry to hear it. Hopefully things work out for you.

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[gsarchie]

Yikes. Sounds like a serious issue. Have you really not eaten in 3 days? If so, do you receive any assistance from the state? If not I would pay a visit to HHS and look into food stamps and even possibly cash assistance. That said, if you take money while someone you live with uses your money for drugs then you have no business asking for help from others.

[ChrisS]

First off go eat! Don't worry about money if he's not. Then leave and go get assistant. There are so many programs that help women, from shelter to food. You don't have to leave him for good but he does need a wake up call.

[PorcelainxDoll]

I get exactly 17$ in food stamps. I dont qualify for more they say I make too much money. I only make 1200$ a month and my bills are over 1000$. That leaves me with $200 for gas groceries and animal food.
My husban has a job but got fired for 2 weeks, then he got his job back but his next few checks are going to be very low. He knows we already live check by check. And yes I havent eaten in 3 days. I wish I could go spwnd money and nit care but its my credit that will get ruined if bills arent paid.

I just dont understand how a 31 yo can be so selfish and irresponsible.
Im not asking anyone for money. I am just ranting. I am very upset.


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[PorcelainxDoll]

And youre still with him because....?

Honestly I have no idea. Probably because I rely on the money he gives me when his checks are good to survive

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[BrandiR]

I think one poster was suggesting that you leave for a bit to give a wake up call. Personally, I'd advise against this. I don't think it's ever a good idea to leave with the intent of returning just to teach someone a lesson.

I've seen this a lot and more often than not, the lesson learned is "I can behave however I want and as long as I shape up for awhile after, she'll come back".
Either the relationship is worth salvaging or it isn't. Sure, sometimes people reconnect after a break up, but that shouldn't be the intent.

This tactic will almost undoubtedly exacerbate the problem and create a cycle of controlling behavior and emotional harm (for both parties).

[MrLang]

Bad guy train coming through.. choo choooooooo

If you really haven't eaten in 3 days then I think there is a lot more being poorly executed here than meets the eye. A box of pasta and a can of sauce is 2 dollars and would make at least 6 meals.

Does it matter what the 40 bucks is for? Let's just call it 'leisure.' Just to play devil's advocate, how much a week do you spend on feeding your pets? I'd consider pet ownership to be a luxury just the same as feeding the mind for relaxation. Haven't you spent 40 bucks a month on feeding the pets that help you maintain peace of mind and excitement from life? Since the whole 'pot' thing is going to get ripped to shreds...

Alternatively (I have no idea if he even has health insurance) he could get a visit with a psychiatrist for depression/stress, pay a co-pay, spend time he could otherwise spend looking for work dealing with these visits, be required to come back for follow-up (more co-pay), get prescribed a food for the mind that has more inhibiting immediate effects (klonopin, valium, etc) and high chances for chemical dependence, pay more co-pay for the prescription, and still be in exactly the same spot (and potentially having spent more money in the process).

So if it's the idea that he spent it on 'pot' that's turning you away I think you need a new husband (your preference, not his failing).

If he's simply being irresponsible with money in general then shame on him.

If your husband is actually out of work / getting small paychecks then he is definitely due more than 17 dollars in food stamps. When I worked at TJMaxx bringing home 200 dollar a week checks I got over 100 dollars a month in assistance.

Good luck, hope I did not offend too much.


EDIT: 100% agree with BrandiR

[PorcelainxDoll]

My husbands a felon. He gets no goverment assistance.

Im not mad about him smoking pot. Im mad that he took it from designated bill money. I put up all our bill money to the side. He took money from that particular amount that he knows not to touch..

Mr. lang no theres nothing going on we were doing fine up till 2 weeks ago. I am mad at him being irresponsible..
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