cheating

[TJ_Burton]

I have been involved in more then one serious/long term relationship. I have been on the cheating end, and the cheated end. I can tell you first hand that some things are extremely situational, and that once a cheater DOES NOT mean always a cheater. I also believe that if someone cheats once, and they feel deep regret, there is a very good chance they will never make that mistake again in their life, with you or anyone else. Sometimes people need to find ways to figure out how they feel; other times it is as simple as losing control with an alcohol filled night. When I made my mistake, I had to talk to my closest friend about it over and over because of the amount of guilt I was dealing with. Of course I wanted to admit my fault to my partner at the time, but I knew it would destroy her, and do nothing other than crumble our relationship while causing her to deal with the pain that I needed off my chest. So rather than telling her, I decided that the regret I felt was mine to bare, and that telling her was simply a selfish act. In the end we are no longer together, but for different reasons, and we left one another on good terms. To this day she does not know that I slipped up, and I will continue to bare that truth on my own.

I have a very simple rule of thumb when it comes to cheating:
- If you do it once, make sure I never find out because I don't want to know. If you did it and know you are not happy with me, leave me and move on.
- If you do it twice, I still do not want to know, but this is a clear sign that you are not happy where you are and you should move on.
- If you tell me, don't expect me to want to stay.

People make mistakes; life and love are not perfect...