How do you get through ambivalence?

[Vasiliki]

"The Art of Happiness" is an interesting little book a friend gave me. While it never applied to me directly (they were things I already lived by), the quotes in the book were worth a read. They are derived from the teachings of a greek philospher back in the day, from his verbal lectures to his students.

I think you might enjoy picking it up and giving it a quick read. If you were closer, I'd lend you mine, as I have lent it to numerous people now.

Relationships ending is never easy. As said by someone above me, it is a form of death. Something that you once relied on isn't there anymore. It's changed. Essentially, you are alone right now, when you once weren't. That's hard to come to terms with.

I don't believe depression is soley genes. It is far too common to just be blamed on chemcials in your brain. You are allowed to feel sad, angry, hurt, frustrated, helpless, lonely, regretful, unresolved, without direction.... We've all been there, and all gone through it. It's just a matter of allowing yourself to feel these emotions, but not have them rule you for too long. Give in to them for now, allow yourself to be weak. Cry. Give yourself up to this moment for now. Only then can you start to rebuild, after all the pieces feel like they've fallen away.

It will take time. Goodness knows it's not something you can fix easily. Sometimes it takes years. But you'll get there, one step at a time. Don't let it overwhelm you, and don't try to shoulder this by yourself.

Every ending is just a new beginning in disguise. Gosh, it sounded so corny when someone told that to me when my common law partner of 6 years left me for his girlfriend on the side.... and their baby girl (which I had no idea about). It broke me. And people kept telling me it gets better, it gets better. Well, it didn't for a long time. But I did get stronger. And eventually I found someone who was everything I'd always hoped for but never dreamed I'd have. But it was only after I stopped trying to control my life and started doing things for myself did everything start falling into place.

You'll get there. It's just raw right now. Hard to feel anything but pain. But wounds heal. They'll mend, scar over. You'll remember them, but eventually they won't hurt anymore to think about.