Sorrow. [Need shoulders to cry on]

[angllady2]

You might as well PM me too. I am always "giving my animals too much credit" and "making them too human". This is me, deal with it.

I talk to each and every one of my snakes, and I will swear in court they talk to me too. I am not joking. My male pastel went on a feeding strike for the breeding season. No big deal. But he got it into his head he did not get enough girlfriends for his manly self, and when everyone else started eating again, he refused.

I would ask him each week if he was ready to eat, and every week he'd look me in the eye and I could hear him saying, "No, not until I get another girlfriend. That darned Kodama had three, and I only got one!" Laugh if you want to. Feel free to call me crazy, it won't be the first time. But it's true. After the last of my non pied girls ovulated, he still would not eat, and he kept giving me that look. Finally I took him out of his tub and sat him down for a talk. I told him, " Look, I know you think this breeding thing isn't fair, and you are right it isn't. However, I'd like to remind you I never intended to bring you home in the first place, but since you've been here I've only ever done my best for you. You know your my favorite male, why else would I get you out all the time ? You also know that I breed for quality babies, and let's face it you are not the best quality pastel. Yes you are more beautiful than when I bought you, but you are still not my ideal pastel and you know it. If it were only me breeding, you wouldn't have had any girl to breed with, but Kyle gave you a shot because he isn't as hung up on quality as I am. Now, Akira just ovulated, and the chances are good you get to be a daddy for me. And I have to admit, I'm kind of excited about it. Maybe one of your babies will be the kind of pastel I'm looking for, stranger things have happened than that. Now, you must get down off your high horse and eat something. You are starting to loose weight, and if you keep it up you won't be ready when the next season rolls around. You know Kyle is set on making a firefly, so he's probably going to ask me to pair you up with Mori when she gets big enough. And he's toying with the idea of making blasts with you and Freckles. So, if you are a good boy, next year you might have three girls too. But you need to eat."

Kyle comes in as I finish my lecture and put him away. And he tells me, "You know that snake cannot understand you, and you sound like a complete idiot talking to him like that, right ?" I told him to mind his own business, and he knew I was crazy when he married me. Feeding day was two days later, and guess who ate not just one rat but two ?

So sure, I'm crazy. Certifiably nuts. Gone round the bend, cheese slid off my cracker, porch light is on but nobody's home, toys in the attic, absolutely bonkers, utterly mad, however you like to say it. But I'll tell you a secret, all the best people are.

Gale