I think the point some are trying to make is that it wasn't a lawful order. He absolutely should have listened to the Dispatcher (who is NOT "Just a phone operator")...like you said above...all this could have been avoided for all the reasons you stated. He wasn't trained, experienced, nor mentally prepared for the consequences. But, following him wasn't against the law. Stupid, but not against the law.
Thank you for doing a job that not many are willing or able to do.