RIP Snake, I also hope you had a decently good life. It's good that you're able to come here and be honest about your mistakes, that tells a lot about your character. I don't know what I would do if anything happened to my first ball python, Captain Hook. I love her more than my dog. Don't get me wrong I love Ivan too but i've only had him for a month so not as attached I guess. My wife is one of the only things I love more than this snake. I'd probably cry for days...and i'm a man I do not cry.