I get the cheapest cat food I can find and grind it up in a coffee grinder. In addition, I will use the dust left over in the bottom of Harlan rodent food bags (soon to be switching over to hog chow). Around once per week, I'll throw in an apple or some other type of fruit. They are roaches, they will eat just about anything.
My large colony has been up and running for over four years. I feed bearded dragons and chameleons from my colony. When the colony gets too big (which is fairly often) I give a bunch away or sell off some of the excess.
Good luck. And Jasbus, quit being so hard on yourself. You can grinded it up if you want!![]()