She used to be a cutter and has numerous big scares on her hips that she would go at before I knew her. I'm not trying to defend her behavior but some things that also happened to her that make her anxiety worse or made her anxiety worse.

#1) her first real boyfriend was an ass and made her do nunerous things she didn't like but went along with because he said he "cared" about her. He ended up practically raping her (tried to undress her, she said no, he got pissed and started yelling, so she submitted and allowed it against her wishes not to). It was a horroble expreince for her (she was only 14), and there was a lot of unplesant things that happened during the process that I don't need to go into detail. He finished, showered, and she left. He said he would call her the next day and never did, he ended up having sex with a couple more girls the next few days even though they were still "dating", that is when she began cutting. And it just escualted from there.

#2) when we first began dating and up till the 7 month mark I flirted a lot with other girls and thought about cheating on her, I never did because I didn't want to be a cheater, but I still consider myself one after everything. I told her and no the trust has pretty much gone, I can't have any friends that are girls.

Now as for me I used to cut and burn myself frequently. I would take a blow torch and heat up nails till red hot and brand words into my body. My friends at the time told me it was all a show for attention and that I was making it all up, I would often go and cry in a corner. They began naming my crying attacks as "kevin breaks" and made it the school joke for anyone who acted upset. They even marked it as their funniest high school memory in the year book. I currently have no real friends as they all think my mental illness is a joke....so f them. They even told me I made up my attempted suicide...yeah like you can fake that? The only people I really have in my life now are her and my snakes. I don't want a different girlfriend, she is the best thing to happen to me belive it or not, as I used to be a real ahole and have a new girlfriend every week. I just need to get it through to her, and myself that we need to figure out something better. I currently can't see a therapist or psychologist because I have no health insurancs. I applied for medicaid but they denied me because I still technically live with my parents. Bs...but whatever.

She was always there for me, talking me out of more suicide attemts, etc. And I'm going to be there for her. She needs help, and support is sometimes what people need most, something I didn't get during my problems.
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