i'm broken

[cecilbturtle]

so i have a heart condition that is well... bad. what kind of heart condition is good right?

my son turns one tomorrow. odds are i wont see him graduate kindergarten let alone high school.

what do i tell him? how do i prepare him? do i keep it a secret? bp.net is the only one who knows....


please oh PLEASE dont tell me to "live life one day at a time." or love him the best i can while i can. i dont need to hear that...

how do i prepare my kid for the inevitable?

[Mft62485]

Maybe make some home movies that he can watch while he grows up.

[youbeyouibei]

I'm sorry. I truly am. It was a stupid movie that I can't think of the title of but make him video diaries. Give him any and all the insight or the thoughts that come to your head. Read him your favorite books on the video. Digital storage is dirt cheap anymore and while it won't come close to comparing to living your life with him, if that's the most you can offer him, seize every means you possibly can. Write him your story, the story of your life. Your hopes, your dreams, your achievements, your failures, the memories you hold most dear...give him as much of you as you possibly can to KNOW you even if you're not there in the physical to be with him.

I hate that for you and I'm incredibly sorry...I don't really know what else to say. Whatever you do, DON'T GIVE UP! There's a saying about not going quietly into the dark night and that's spot on! Doctors make mistakes all the time and a prognosis isn't a sentence necessarily. Hang in there, man and as always, we're here to help in any way we can.

[llovelace]

The name of the movie with the video diary was "My Life" starring Michael Keaton.
Are you registered on a transplant list?

[mark and marley]

I'm sorry. I truly am. It was a stupid movie that I can't think of the title of but make him video diaries. Give him any and all the insight or the thoughts that come to your head. Read him your favorite books on the video. Digital storage is dirt cheap anymore and while it won't come close to comparing to living your life with him, if that's the most you can offer him, seize every means you possibly can. Write him your story, the story of your life. Your hopes, your dreams, your achievements, your failures, the memories you hold most dear...give him as much of you as you possibly can to KNOW you even if you're not there in the physical to be with him.

I hate that for you and I'm incredibly sorry...I don't really know what else to say. Whatever you do, DON'T GIVE UP! There's a saying about not going quietly into the dark night and that's spot on! Doctors make mistakes all the time and a prognosis isn't a sentence necessarily. Hang in there, man and as always, we're here to help in any way we can.

i agree entirely.i have a 1.5 month old daughter thats what i would do.video documentary. dude my eyes are tearing up just thinking about this. and i agree with the previous post drs make mistakes.they make scientific guesses.my mom battled breastcancer for four years of treatment.she wasnt supposed to win the battle docs said but she stayed strong and pushed through it..stay strong,dont go quietly in the dark night leave your imprint in day light.never give in and fight til the end.all of our energies are focused on your health.best wishes buddy

[wilomn]

I've given this a bit of thought of late.

Just be true to you. You know what you need to do, what you want to do, what you can do. If he's got half a brain he'll never doubt that you loved him and if you're not there, that you would have done just about anything so that you could have been.

Worrying about things you can't change, the future whatever it may be, will simply depress the heck out of you. You won't stop, but you need to be willing to recognize what you're doing. Feeling like crap, like you're disappointing your son is, I think, bothering you. Good fathers aren't all that common. Take some solace that you are one. It counts whether or not he remembers all of it personally or through what you leave for him, if you wind up having to do that.

I can speak for myself, though yours is a more immediate concern, if you strive to be the man you want to be, the rest will fall into place. It's not as easy as it sounds and there are constant failures, sort of like real life, but with your end game being so possibly near, your successes are meaningful in a way, for me anyway, different, more intense, valuable, than before.

Be who and what you want, what you always wished you were. Even if you think you're faking it, just do it. Eventually, like that little wooden boy, it will become real.

[mpkeelee]

i dont know what to say, im not a father. this is terrible. but if i were you i would invest in a nice video camera and start taping everything. thru the years he can watch new tapes and see different sides of you and he can learn more and more about you as he grows up. im sure i can speak for a lot of people here when i say you will be in our thoughts and prayers.

[Highline Reptiles South]

Not to get off target, but is transplant not an option? Your a young guy in a good shape. The perfect candidate?

[killerphade310]

My dad had a heart condition but he didnt really take care of himself he was a mean drunk, havent seen him since i was 14...all i can say is take care of your self