I managed to get it down to the 60 range. I had some tin foil covering 4/5 of the screen top.. I took it off and put a piece of dry cloth over 3/4 instead. this seems to be doing the job.

and we did make pretty good progress with the male yesterday, he didnt freak out and try to high tail it off the bed this time. He started getting curious and flicking his tongue.

It seems that once he noticed me holding the female he loosened up and got a little more friendly.