Funniest CL ad ever (satire)

[Lolo76]

Somebody posted this Craigslist ad on another forum (the original has since been flagged/removed), and I thought the folks here would get a good laugh from it... too funny!!

"New Home Needed ASAP"

Please help! After two long years of being on a waiting list for a dog, we have been notified by breed rescue that, at long last, our number has come up and ... WE ARE HAVING A PUPPY!

We must get rid of our children IMMEDIATELY because we just know how time consuming our new little puppy is going to be and it just wouldn't be fair to the children. Since our little puppy will be arriving on Monday we MUST place the children up for adoption this weekend!

They are described as:

One male -- his name is Tommy, Caucasian (English/Irish mix), light blonde hair, blue eyes. Four years old. Excellent disposition. He doesn't bite. Temperament tested. Does have problems with peeing directly in the toilet. Has had chicken Pox and is current on all shots. Tonsils have already been removed. Tommy eats everything, is very clean, house trained and gets along well with others. Does not run with scissors and with a little training he should be able to read soon.

One female -- her name is Lexie, Caucasian (English/Irish mix), strawberry blonde hair, green eyes quite freckled. Two years old. Can be surly at times. Non-biter, thumb sucker. Has been temperament tested but needs a little attitude adjusting occasionally. She is current on all shots, tonsils out, and is very healthy and can be affectionate. Gets along well with other little girls and little boys but does not like to share her toys and
therefore would do best in a one child household. She is a very quick learner and is currently working on her house training. Shouldn't take long at all.

We really do LOVE our children so much and want to do what's right for them. That is why we contacted a rescue group. But we simply can no longer keep them. Also, we are afraid that they may hurt our new puppy.

I hope you understand that ours is a UNIQUE situation and we have a real emergency here! They MUST be placed into your rescue by Sunday night at the latest or we will be forced to drop them off at the orphanage or along some dark, country road. Our priority now has to be our new puppy.

$10 rehoming fee but price is very negotiable."

[Lolo76]

Oh, and behind the humor of course is a sad message... how people can so cavalierly give up their "beloved pets" really boggles my mind.

[darkbloodwyvern]

^^ I've seen this one around. I like kids, but I'd rather have the puppy honestly! (Don't worry ya'll I have no children and will never have them, I much prefer to be the cool aunt!)

It is very sad... Many times pets might be able to adjust, otherwise, if you plan to have kids, adopt an animal that is kid safe! My best friend has an amazing dog that loves kids and plans to have a baby someday. Their dog will always have a home with them!

[PitOnTheProwl]

We tried this but after a couple of hours the other family brought our 15y old son back
Guess we are stuck with him for another 3 years

I too am tired of people coming up with lame reason that they have to get rid of their pets.

[DellaF]

Hilarious!

[SlitherinSisters]

That is hilarious! Oh I so want to post it on my local craigslist!!! It is ridiculous to see all the ads of "I don't have enough time for my pet". It's a bunch of bull. The most sickening ads are the ones in which the people are getting rid of a dog they had for 8 years! How could you do that. There have been plenty of times I've threatened Athena (my dobie) that I was going to put her on craiglist for her home remodeling jobs, but she's MY problem. I'M the one who brought her home, I'M the one that should have to deal with her. If I birthed a child that got in the way of my life I can't just re-home it! My pets are my children, I couldn't imagine not having time for my own children.

My favorite are the people that 'don't have the time' for ball pythons. Really?

[PitOnTheProwl]

We have someone here in SA trying to rehome a 10yo cat!!!!!!

[SlitherinSisters]

We have someone here in SA trying to rehome a 10yo cat!!!!!!

Poor kitty. I'm wondering if these people get rid of their pets once they start to have health issues.

[Swingline0.0.1]

Poor kitty. I'm wondering if these people get rid of their pets once they start to have health issues.

Exactly. I think that every time I see that. Also "I am moving and my new place will not accept pets". Really??

[PitOnTheProwl]

Exactly. I think that every time I see that. Also "I am moving and my new place will not accept pets". Really??

If they really wanted the pet they would have thought of a "pet deposit" or a "pit-bull friendly" place. Some people just have their heads way up in the dark.