I feel horrible. Has anything similar to this happened to anyone?

[shelliebear]

I had an experience like that. I bought a rat pup from a small pet store as a feeder, because that's the only size my baby BP can take for now.
They put the little guy in a paper bag, so I could hear and feel him moving around in it. Poor thing couldn't even see yet.
So I ended up feeling bad, and took him out in the car. He was so cute. I snuggled with him for forever, and then remembered I had just paid what little money I had for it as food, and my mom is TERRIFIED of rodents (NONE IN THE HOUSE EXCEPT FROZEN ONES! are allowed).
I eventually gave him to my fiance, who...gave the rat to my ball python. It was so sad. I went upstairs and covered my ears, crying.
I'm now trying to switch all my snakes to F/T (all but two are). I can't do that again.
I'm sorry about what happened. I understand.
When you're not in the scenario, you think, "It's part of nature." but then you see the mouse or rat and you think, "But does ti have to be this one???"
Again, sorry, and I understand.
Shellie