You're a good person and you have a lot of support from the good people on this forum! You may feel like you're dealing with this alone, but trust me you're not. We are all here for you!
You have to remind yourself that the pain you may be feeling, no matter how bad, is only matched by the beauty that still exists all around you! It may not seem like it now, but it's moments like these that will make you stronger in the long run! The troubling times that test one's heart and soul will end up doubling the strength of your resolve, courage, and compassion! You'll get through this and you'll come out on the other side stronger then ever!
Try to focus on the things that make you happy. Try to discover new things that will bring you happiness. You're much stronger then you realize and you can take this pain and turn it into positive forces.
It's hard for others to see into our individual "mental prisons". Your roommate most likely cares for you but just doesn't understand how deep these holes we can fall into get... You say you don't have anyone but just look at the positive responses you've received just in the last hour! You've been there for us in the past and now we are all here for you now! We may not be sitting there right next to you but we all offer our virtual shoulders you can cry on anytime you need to! .. As for the insomnia - I know all about that! Olstyn has it right - try to exercise before going to bed. It can be extremely hard to fall asleep when you have a lot on your mind. The best thing you can do is to try and sleep ONLY when you are really exhausted. Exercise is also a great way to release some pent up negative energy!
Just keep pushing forward. It will be worth it in the end. I promise.
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