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Thread: Idiot Sightings

  1. #1
    BPnet Veteran cardell75's Avatar
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    Talking Idiot Sightings

    Good for a laugh anyways.......

    IDIOT SIGHTING #1:

    We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman
    told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a
    'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute,
    and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a
    1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a
    1/4 horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.He
    said, "NO, it's not. Four is larger than two."

    We haven't used Sears repair since.


    IDIOT SIGHTING #2:

    My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window
    and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also
    handed her a quarter. She said, "You gave me too much money."
    I said, "Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar
    bill back." She sighed and went to get the manager who asked
    me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the
    quarter, and said "We're sorry but we cannot do that kind of
    thing." The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75
    cents in change.

    Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.


    IDIOT SIGHTING #3:

    I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor
    call the local township administrative office to request the
    removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too
    many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is
    a good place for them to be crossing anymore."

    From Kingman, KS.

    IDIOT SIGHTING #4:

    My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She
    asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He
    said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

    From Kansas City .


    IDIOT SIGHTING #5:

    I was at the airport, checking in at the gate, when an airport
    employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage
    without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was
    without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly
    and nodded, "That's why we ask."

    Happened in Birmingham, Ala.


    IDIOT SIGHTING #6:


    The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the
    street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged
    coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
    I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
    Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing
    driving?!"


    She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS


    IDIOT SIGHTING #7:

    We were having a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear
    coworker, as she was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.'
    Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do
    this more often." Not another word was spoken. We all just
    looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

    This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.


    IDIOT SIGHTING #8:

    I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into
    itself and for the her life of her, couldn't understand why her
    system would not turn on.

    A deputy at the County Sheriff's office, no less.


    IDIOT SIGHTING #9:

    When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to
    pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it.
    We went to the service department and found a mechanic working
    feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from
    the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and
    discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the
    technician, "It's open!" His reply, "I know. I already got
    that side.
    This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS .(The
    government probably kept this one in business with stimulus
    money.)


    IDIOT SIGHTING #10:

    When I left Hawaii and was transferred to Florida, I still
    had the Hawaiian plates on my car, as my car was shipped from
    Hawaii. I was parking somewhere (I can't remember where) and
    a guy asked me "Wow, you drove from Hawaii to here?" I looked
    at him and quickly said "Yep. I took the Hawaii/San Francisco
    Bridge". He nodded his head and said "Cool!"


    STAY ALERT! They walk among us..... they VOTE, they REPRODUCE and they believe in Global Warming...
    Charles B. Cardell
    www.ciderinc.com

    People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing
    it. - George Bernard Shaw

  2. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to cardell75 For This Useful Post:

    RockyTop (02-08-2010),Sarin (02-08-2010),Snakeman (02-08-2010),Swingline0.0.1 (02-08-2010)

  3. #2
    BPnet Veteran tonkatoyman's Avatar
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    Re: Idiot Sightings

    You are so right. Want to see their relatives just tune in to Jerry Springer.

    By the way if you have ever been to Canton Ms. you would understand that one completely
    Last edited by tonkatoyman; 02-08-2010 at 03:05 PM.

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    cardell75 (02-08-2010)

  5. #3
    BPnet Veteran twistedtails's Avatar
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    Re: Idiot Sightings

    That's some funny stuff right there!

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    cardell75 (02-08-2010)

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    BPnet Veteran snakey68's Avatar
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    Re: Idiot Sightings

    You have to laugh dont you crikey some people
    There is a moose loose aboot this hoose !

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    cardell75 (02-08-2010)

  9. #5
    BPnet Veteran Snakeman's Avatar
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    Re: Idiot Sightings

    lo these are hilarious. this is why common sense isnt so "common".
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    BPnet Veteran FIEND_FO_LYFE's Avatar
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    Re: Idiot Sightings

    HAHAHA
    These made my day.


    THANKS.

    -Theo

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    cardell75 (02-08-2010)

  13. #7
    Registered User RockyTop's Avatar
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    Re: Idiot Sightings

    Quote Originally Posted by cardell75 View Post
    they VOTE, they REPRODUCE and they believe in Global Warming...

    Best line of the day.

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    cardell75 (02-08-2010)

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