Quote Originally Posted by Mindibun View Post
I asked my boss to call in a favor for me with the vet that he works with. I have an appointment to take the girls tomorrow at 1:45 in the afternoon to be euthanized. I will ask if there are any other options, but I know deep down that this is probably best. I just need to hear a doctor say, "No, you've done all you can. Let them go in peace."

I wanted to spend the night with them but they are just so very tired. I held Dexi for a bit, petting her like I always do and she was bruxing SO loudly. -lol- I don't think I've ever heard her be that loud before. I'll give them a good meal before bedtime and spend a little more quiet time with them. Tomorrow I'll probably take them outside in a carrier for a bit and let them get some fresh air.

I thought for certain that when I came home from work and saw them that I would start crying all over again. But I made up my mind that I didn't want them to sense any negativity from me and I've been happy and talking in baby voices all night. I haven't allowed myself to be sad. There will be time for that tomorrow.

I've made up my mind to fix up their cage, repaint it and get it nice again and donate it to a local rat rescue. I think that would make the girls happy (if they could understand things the same way we humans do).

I just want to be in the room when they put them out. I know that this doctor (who is actually purely a bird doctor - never anything other than birds) has a chamber of sorts that he lays the animal(s) in to administer the gas. I've asked him to use a heavy dose of isoflurane and hopefully bipass any needles altogether. He seems to be perfectly ok with this. I just need to be the last thing the girls see, and I need to know that everything went smoothly and there were no problems and the girls are "ok now." I hope the vet will let me into the back when he does it...
Your such a sweet person. I will definitely keep you and your girls in my thoughts a prayers. There are few things harder than letting go of something you love and it is clear you love them. Remember the good times with them, the love, the laughs that a small creature can bring to you. They have been lucky to have you and you have been lucky to have them!