due to a couple posts on this site (christians, and gays) i've been thinking about how much of an overbearing :cens0r::cens0r::cens0r::cens0r::cens0r::cens0r::cens0r: my father is. really. a little background... growing up, he was never around. i'd be lucky to see him twice a year. that was fine as far as i was concerned... i didn't know it should be any different. then, in 9th grade, due to some difficult circumstances with my mom (whole nother thread! but i've come to terms) i moved in with him. he was a tyrant. i was not allowed to talk to boys outside of school. period. i wasn't allowed to do anything that normal teens were able to do because i might meet a boy. he was insanely overprotective of my sister michelle and i because my older siblings (his kids from his ex) were the basic 'wild teens,' sneaking out at night, drinking, doing drugs, my sis, mary became a mom at 16. so, because he was too busy doing drugs himself at that time, i was allowed no life. he ended up moving us 80 miles away from school so we absolutely couldn't hang out with ANYBODY.

and he liked to tell people that he didn't mind gay people as long as they stay away from him and his. how generous! a few years ago, my brother (not his son) 'came out of the closet.' hows that for staying away from his family?

somewhere along the line, he decided that michelle and i both had to marry ojibwe men. we lived 3 or 4 states away from the nearest ojibwe rez. michelle ended up with a white boy and he got mad and got over it. i ended up moving to wisconsin to help out my family (sick uncle) and i was supposed to find myself a nice ojibwe guy to settle down with. i knew that wasn't going to happen, we were still 4 hours away from lac du flambeau where i was supposed to find this guy. i wasn't gonna drive all that way every weekend!

he ended up leaving wisconsin (he never planned on staying) and expected me to go with him. when i said no, he got mad as hell and told me i was gonna end up a good for nothing single mother of two like my cuz and i was never gonna go anywhere in life if i stayed. too bad dad. i'll take my chances. about 6 months after he left, i met matt. matt is german and norske. when i told my dad, he flipped out and i didn't here from him for a year. i heard from everybody else what he was saying about me though. i'm not even gonna bother repeating it, but you can imagine.

so, after a year, i called my stepmom to wish her a happy birthday (she still kept in touch with me) and he answered it. he pretended that nothing was ever wrong between us. fine. i'm not gonna make a bigger issue of it. this was a year and a half ago.

so, we've talked a few times but our relationship has never gotten and never will get back to what it used to be. i've accepted that. life is less stressful that way anyways. well, this year he decided not to call me on my birthday. fine. whatever. that's the way he is. but seeing as how i didn't get a call from him, i didn't really feel the need to call him a week later for fathers day. childish or not, i feel it's justified. so, today, my phone starts ringing. my stepmom. i didn't answer cuz i was visiting with my cousin and didn't want to be interupted by her. so she left me a drunken voicemail wanting to know why i didn't call for fathers day!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so then, i was too pissed off to even call her back and discuss it. so i text her and told her why i didn't call. so she tried calling again. nope. sorry. not home. then my cousin's phone starts ringing! really the nerve!!!
they can't remember my birthday but god forbid i don't call to honor him and tell him what a great dad he is!!!!

sorry this is so long! i tend to ramble when i'm worked up! and, really, this is only the tip of the iceberg of paternal problems i have! again, sorry... just need to let out some steam....